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Original poster

a question about late abortions...

122 replies

followthestarlover · 10/12/2005 22:45

am genuinely curious, and don't want this to turn into a big controversial thread!!!

I have been thinking about some of the links posted on the thread I started about the lady who survived being aborted... and the partial birth abortion technique which just sounds hideous.

I don't think I could bear to ever do that..even if I was dying, although obviously I have never been in that situation...

but I just wondered how they perform late abortions over here, please tell me it isn't like that?
and also, what reasons do they do them for? I think they do it if the mother has cancer that needs treating? is that right? what else?

also, how late can a late abortion be up to? I mean, say you only had 4 weeks to go.. would they induce you? what is the cut off?

I am just being really nosy here, and hope this doesn't upset/offend anyone

OP posts:
GoodKingWestCountryLass · 10/12/2005 23:28

I terminated my first much wanted pregnancy at 23 weeks because of a fetal abnormality that was incompatible with life (a term loosely thrown around but which means the child would have died during labour or shortly after birth.

My baby was wrapped in a blanket and put in a moses basket, not left to die in a bin Babies are not treated this way, most are much wanted and if they are born alive then either their parents hold them til they die or if their parents cannot do that then a midwife will look after the baby.

I was given two tablets 48 hours before I went in for an induction of labour, this was an induction of labour using pessaries jsut like of you were induced because you were overdue. Some parents choose to have their babies heart stopped before delivery, this is done with an injextion of potassium.

If you have any further questions then please ask or visit this site:

www.arc-uk.org/choices/end.html

Oh and I held my baby, took photos and had a funeral for him which the hospital chaplain arranged too

OnTheFlossDayOfChristmas · 10/12/2005 23:30

WCL, that was very brave of you to post. I hope my post didn't upset you. I was refferring to unwanted pregnancies, yours was very very different. I can't imagine it. xxxx

HunkerXmasAndAMunkerNewYear · 10/12/2005 23:30

WCL

GoodKingWestCountryLass · 10/12/2005 23:31

Re the 38 week termination, if the baby had major abnormalities the parents may have chosen to termiante the pregnancy so that no heroic measures were taken following the babies birth (to ensure no further suffering) rather than continue with the pregnancy and the baby receive medical intervention to no avail

OnTheFlossDayOfChristmas · 10/12/2005 23:32

Yes Hunker. A very brave set of parents to do that IMO.

OnTheFlossDayOfChristmas · 10/12/2005 23:32

I mean WCL. sorry.

jinglinggoblin · 10/12/2005 23:32

i did stress this was catholic teaching, they were trying to put us off the idea. i feel terrible about posting that, i really didnt think. the stuff we were shown related to women who wanted to terminate pregnancies, we were grudgingly told that it could be 'forgiven' for having an abortion if the pregnancy was going to kill you or the baby. im sorry gkwcl, i didnt want to offend anyone, was just posting what we were taught at school

Original poster
followthestarlover · 10/12/2005 23:32

gkwcl thank you for the link... and for sharing your story with us. I am so glad to know that it isn't the horrible type of thing i have read about.
not saying that it isn't an awful thing to go through.. but ykwim?

OP posts:
HunkerXmasAndAMunkerNewYear · 10/12/2005 23:34

I like to think nobody takes the decision to have an abortion at any time lightly, least of all a late one

Original poster
followthestarlover · 10/12/2005 23:34

gkwcl i hadn't thought about it in terms of keeping the baby alive after birth... that would certainly go some way to explaining why such a late abortion was carried out...
the poor parents having to make that decision though

OP posts:
GoodKingWestCountryLass · 10/12/2005 23:35

Its OK, it is very sad, but it was 8 years ago and I have accepted my decision now and know I made the right decision for my child. I know many may think I did it for myself, that I made the right decision for myself but, honestly, ending a much wanted pregnancy is not done for that reason.

My baby had a diaphragmatic hernia, his intestines etc were in his chest cavity and his lungs did not grow, he had lots of other abnoramlities of the upper body, limbs and head too But it was his pulmonary ssues that were the deciding factor as he basically did not have any lungs, only pod like structures that could not grow because of the hernia. So had he been born alive he would not have been able to breathe and would have basically struggled for breath and suffocated

sparklymieow · 10/12/2005 23:36

WCL

Original poster
followthestarlover · 10/12/2005 23:38

you know i wish some pro-life campaigners would think about stuff like that...

it's all about the rights of the child.... but surely better that way than to die from suffocation straight after birth?

OP posts:
jinglinggoblin · 10/12/2005 23:38

gkwcl, that is nothing like what i was referring to, i cant imagine doing anything other than what you did in that situation. the person i knew was told she had a miniscule chance her baby would make it through surgery so she went for it. i would have done that in her situation, but yours was clearly different. am so sorry

oops · 10/12/2005 23:39

Message withdrawn

GoodKingWestCountryLass · 10/12/2005 23:41

Can I add that had I continued with the pregnancy and delivered a live baby he would have been whipped away, taken to NICU, had venflons and been intubated - and for what?

OnTheFlossDayOfChristmas · 10/12/2005 23:41

I am happy to make my own decisions based on what i know and my circumstances at the time, and know what would be my decision every time in ideal circumatances . But I never judge anyone else who comes to a different conclusion than me. When it is the health of the baby that is the issue then everything gets even harder, if that is possible. WCL, to my mind, you did the kindest, humanist thing. And I'm sure in your heart of hearts you undoubtedly know that. xxx

Original poster
followthestarlover · 10/12/2005 23:42

can totally understand your decision... i think i would have done the same...

OP posts:
OnTheFlossDayOfChristmas · 10/12/2005 23:43

You know what WCL, we have some many older patients for whom as Nurses and Doctors we feel the same way. Relatives want to hold on and on even, all to often, when it is not in the sick persons best interest. Making that decision about such a new and precious life I cannot get my head around. xxx

GoodKingWestCountryLass · 10/12/2005 23:46

Exactly Floss. I am a befriender for ARC and I take calls from parents in similiar situations and although the issues are similiar each childs conditions are unique too.

jinglinggoblin · 10/12/2005 23:48

it is unnecessary suffering i object to. wcl, your baby was treated with respect and it must have been a heart breaking thing to go through, but i would have done the same. its the lack of respect and the fact that unborn children can be treated worse than animals that upsets me. i know abortions are sometimes necessary, i just dont understand why they arent all carried out with the amount of thought yours was. there must be a better way to do it than the suction method, i dont understand why it hasnt been replaced by something more humane

Original poster
followthestarlover · 10/12/2005 23:53

i had one by suction at around 10 weeks (i thought it was 6, doctor said 13, notes afterwards said 10)

it was that or take tablets and miscarry.
I wanted to be out of it and have it over and done with

OP posts:
oops · 10/12/2005 23:53

Message withdrawn

oops · 10/12/2005 23:55

Message withdrawn

jinglinggoblin · 11/12/2005 00:00

im not judging the women who have abortions, its the people who carry them out and think up how to go about things like this i dont understand. they have all the info on what happens, surely some of them have thought there must be a nicer way to do it. why isnt ther more research done on this stuff? isnt it important enough?

i was offered an abortion when i had my first doctors appointment after finding out i was pg with ds1. i was 19 (just) had only known his dad a month, didnt plan it, had no idea what i was going to do with my life.. but abortion didnt cross my mind. it is shocking that the doctor would assume i would want it without me having mentioned it at all. i dont get on with the medical profession very well