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Original poster

A 'friend' let her 13 year old DS go to a fancy dress party in..

35 replies

Twiglett · 14/11/2005 13:17

an afro wig and blacked up face. I was appalled and said so

She told me I was being insufferable and not to be so ridiculous .. some of the boys were dressing up as girls and it was the same thing

I need confirmation that I'm not totally barking to think this is inappropriate

OP posts:
handlemecarefully · 14/11/2005 13:18

Not a sensible choice. No, I'd be distinctly uncomfortable too.

Happy birthday btw

Freckle · 14/11/2005 13:19

Well I once went to a f/d party as Cleopatra and my outfit included make-up to make me look "exotic". Is that the same thing?

handlemecarefully · 14/11/2005 13:20

Ummm, I don't feel it's the same thing since you were going as Cleopatra....

but afro wig etc - it's a bit Bernard Manning

Gobbledigook · 14/11/2005 13:21

Hmmm, well, was he supposed to be someone inparticular - a character?

aloha · 14/11/2005 13:22

I am amazed! Not someone in East Dulwich, surely! (and I'm only half joking on that last point).
Totally inappropriate.

gingerbear · 14/11/2005 13:23

My DB once did this as his hero Jimmy Hendrix, I thought it was imaginative and not offensive.

NotQuiteCockney · 14/11/2005 13:25

If you're being a specific person, it might be ok ... presumably gingerbear's DB had a guitar or something, or headband? Something specifically Jimi Henrixy, IYSWIM.

Otherwise, no, too Black + White Minstrel Show.

handlemecarefully · 14/11/2005 13:26

That's different Gingerbear - he was a particular person i.e. Jimi H

Not just a Jamaaaaaaican patois speaking parody

Freckle · 14/11/2005 13:26

Would you feel the same if a black person "whited" up for a f/d party?

Original poster
Twiglett · 14/11/2005 13:27

no, not dressing up as a particular person .... I wouldn't have minded Hendrix or Bob Marley as they're a character and I'm not that blinkin' PC

The conversation was that her DS was not that socially aware .. didn't fit in with the cool kids and the like (this from parents who have always been cool) ... and all I could think was well that's just not going to help now is it?

No aloha .. was up in the North .. not in London .. are you coming to the open day on wednesday still btw??

OP posts:
CarolinaMoon · 14/11/2005 13:28

it's one thing to go as a particular person who happens to be a different race from you (e.g. hendrix, cleopatra), but it's pretty crass to just go as "a black person". How about going as a fat person? Or a disabled person?

tbh, sending boys in drag is a bit odd too IMHO.

so, no - you're not barking. She is.

HRHQoQ · 14/11/2005 13:28

Short of painting him all black (cost a bit in body paint!) surely a black face and afro wig was the closest he could get?

Freckle - it woulnd't (and hasn't) bothered me. I've been to plenty of parties with "White" Blacks, and "Black" Whites, and some in between........but then we were all hidiously drunk and stoned

Blu · 14/11/2005 13:29

No Twiglett, I absolutely do not think you are barking, and as for calling you insufferable....

I wonder what the party host thought, because if it was at our house we wouldn't be amused.

gingerbear · 14/11/2005 13:31

oh, that does seem odd then. Wonder what his friends at the party thought about it?

aloha · 14/11/2005 13:33

I am pretty unkeen on fancy dress anyway. Weirdo men who think it is hilarious to dress up as women (excuse me while I split my sides), or Hitler (oh my, I don't think my corset will allow this much mirth) and grown women dressed in rubber nurses' outfits.

The only good fancy dress I ever went to was for babies, and that was funny and sweet. Ds went as Superman. He had absolutely no idea.

HRHQoQ · 14/11/2005 13:34

ahh - having seen Twigletts post that says he wasn't going as "someone" it does seem a bit odd (blimey what did that makes us .)

Rhubarb · 14/11/2005 13:35

LOL! Did any of the black kids go made up as white kids with blonde wigs?????????

Rhubarb · 14/11/2005 13:35

Happy Birthday btw!

NotQuiteCockney · 14/11/2005 13:39

Black people don't have a great history (not that I know of) of dressing up as white people to mock us. So a black person dressed up as white would be different - and also more original, as it's not something we've seen before.

Original poster
Twiglett · 14/11/2005 13:40

'snot my frickin' birthday and you well know it ..

OP posts:
Blu · 14/11/2005 13:40

Quite, NotQuite!

Marina · 14/11/2005 13:40

definitely not insufferable or ridiculous Twiglett. And no, it won't help his cred at all. I feel really sorry for him if either he or his mum thought this was acceptable these days.

Gobbledigook · 14/11/2005 13:41

Oh, very odd choice then if not going as Michael Jackson or something! I'm not sure if it's offensive, just very strange. Haven't people been to parties dressed as French person with a stripey top, beret and string of onions?! I haven't but y'know...I'm just thinking!

Hate fancy dress.

Agree about blokes in drag - it just ain't funny!

HRHQoQ · 14/11/2005 13:43

"and also more original, as it's not something we've seen before"

blimey these Brits really are behind the times (so to speak) original - black dressing up as white.......wish my scanner was working so I could drag out my photos of those parties 7yrs ago - plenty of 'race swapping' going on there (and Channel 5 thought they were doing something unusual LOL).

Toothache · 14/11/2005 13:48

I personally don't really see what the problem is! I've been to plenty of parties (70s parties etc) where people have been in afro wigs and faces painted brown.

Am I missing something fundamental here?