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Original poster

Worst Rudie Encounter

30 replies

Twinkie · 02/10/2003 11:55

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WSM · 02/10/2003 12:46

When I popped my cherry. He was 17, Head Boy and supposedly the school stud (ROFL!) we did it in his bed, it was quick and I hardly felt a thing. He was mechanical and unimaginative, we split soon after.

Also once did a really loud fanny fart at a really inopportune moment, I couldn't carry on for laughing, the bloke didn't find it so funny !

Original poster
Twinkie · 02/10/2003 14:10

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Neetsmassi · 02/10/2003 14:56

When his mum walked in on us - i was on top and lay back down very quickly so don't know if she saw anything - still don't know why she came in without knocking. Recently - we had just finished and 2 secods later I heard a "mummy I need you" - no nice cuddle afterwards!

whatsaname · 02/10/2003 15:53

When I used to live with an old flame, we'd been out for a night out with a guy he'd met from work.

This friend was staying at our place for the night and walked in on us whilst he was "looking for the toilet". He then proceeded to walk in on us a further 4-or-5 times. cheeky sod!

Also had to stop mid 'session' once - to chuck up out the window... (I'd had to much to drink). Same boyfriend actually, think maybe we drank and shagged too much. When I got up the next day and asked 'who'd been squirting silly string on the roof' he replied that it was actually my stomach acid... the previous nights activities all came flooding back!!!

Can't believe I've told everyone that!

Original poster
Twinkie · 02/10/2003 16:04

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ThomCat · 02/10/2003 16:11

I feel sick all over again thinking about this - It wasn't the worst - in fact in could have been one of the best - but it was my most embarrassing - I was still at home - boyfriend from college - he 'came in for coffee' and we put the fire on - and were getting along just fine, (with me on top!), when the lounge door opened, the light came on and there was my mum in her dressing-gown! OMG - yuck - feel sick thinking of her standing there - why did I have to be on top at the time. I suppose it could have been worse - but I don't even want to go there.

Northerner · 02/10/2003 16:15

Oh My God I am cringing reading these. I would die if my parents ever walked in on me!

Original poster
Twinkie · 02/10/2003 16:18

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ThomCat · 02/10/2003 16:31

Twinkie - 'plugging away'!!!!!!! euugghhhhh sorry - too graphic but very funny!!!!!!

Original poster
Twinkie · 02/10/2003 16:44

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doormat · 02/10/2003 16:48

Why arent we good enough for your dp twinkie?

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Twinkie · 02/10/2003 16:51

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dadslib · 02/10/2003 16:51

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ks · 02/10/2003 17:03

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ThomCat · 02/10/2003 17:12

Ha - v good Dadslib!

sunchowder · 03/10/2003 02:06

Don't know how I missed this dirty thread! I usually say the totally wrong thing and kill the thread so maybe someone will have to beg me to tell...

WSM · 03/10/2003 08:50

ROFL Dadslib

I once caught my mum at it with her LTR I was about 13 or 14.... They'd been out for the evening (left me at home alone)got back fairly late. They were fairly mullered so woke me up with their slamming the front door coming in. I lay in bed waiting to drop back off to sleep but couldn't, so I decided that I'd go downstairs and say hello. Down the stairs I go.... open the living room door and there is my mum on the floor leaning against the chair (on her knees IYSWIM) with her boyfriend thrashing about and grunting against her In a state of horrifed shock I shut the door and went back upstairs feeling sick. I waited for mum to come upstairs to see if I was ok, I waited over 15 minutes before she turned up - The b*tch had waited to FINISH before she came to see if I was ok !!!!! I'm still scarred by that to this day !

beetroot · 03/10/2003 08:55

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misdee · 03/10/2003 08:55

first time with my now ex-dh (mieow dont repeat this to him ok!!!). anyway, got the jonny out the wrapper, he went to put it on and it went flying across the bedroom. i was trying hard not to laugh at it might 'kill' the moment. anyway 2nd one went on fine. went to look for the flying jonny after and couldnt find it. 18months later when we were emptying his room as we were moving in together, we still couldnt find it. i always wonder if his mum found it at all. cringey thinking about it.

WSM · 03/10/2003 09:05

I couldn't look her in the eye for months after beetroot ! Happy to say that she has never caught me and we get on great now

Metrobaby · 03/10/2003 09:05

This is my DH's worst rudie moment. His parents were chatting to us one evening and they said they that when my DH was away at University, they had their 2 grandkids over visiting who were 8 yrs at the time. DH's parents suddenly realised that it had gone very quiet upstairs in DH's room where the boys had been playing. When they went up to investigate they found the boys busily studying DH's collection of 'magazines'. DH was mortified afterwards they had found them. Oddly enough though they only told the tale several years later to him and the magazines still hadn't been removed.

WSM · 03/10/2003 09:05

Still can't bring myself to laugh about it with her though

WSM · 03/10/2003 09:08

ROFL metrobaby. I remember finding my alcoholic uncles stash (he lived with us for a year or so whilst he 'detoxed', yeah right is all I can say!). He was in his mid 30's at the time and they were along an ummmm 'mature' theme, Electric Blue over 60's was one of them, also distinctly remember 'Shaven Ravers', ROFL !

beetroot · 03/10/2003 09:15

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WSM · 03/10/2003 09:19

Hmmmm, I would be too mortified to continue if any of our kids caught us no matter how drunk I was !