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Original poster

spitting mad/sad/god knows

67 replies

ggglimpopo · 04/09/2005 14:07

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KBear · 05/09/2005 08:11

When I look back at the contempt I dished out to my parents when I was younger I shudder. She will too but there's nothing for it but to ride the storm. I wish you luck and we are always here for tea and sympathy when it all gets too much.

beetroot · 05/09/2005 08:16

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ggglimpopo · 05/09/2005 08:17

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beetroot · 05/09/2005 08:21

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ggglimpopo · 05/09/2005 08:21

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beetroot · 05/09/2005 08:24

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ggglimpopo · 05/09/2005 08:25

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Springchicken · 05/09/2005 08:25

The only thing I can say is "Please don't think your alone with this". I know it doesn't make things easier but i was just like this when i was 16 and i was propbably 10 times worse.
I think my mum would've dealt with things in the wrong way but luckily, I had 2 older brothers who had already made these mistakes that I had.

I doubt she is any different to most 16 year olds, I used to lie, drink, smoke, swear, shout, scream etc but now I am 21 with my own house, a lovely fiancé and a beautiful DD.
What I am trying to say is that it may be hard now and you may feel like tearing your hair out but it will get better.

Original poster
ggglimpopo · 05/09/2005 08:25

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beetroot · 05/09/2005 08:25

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ggglimpopo · 05/09/2005 08:26

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beetroot · 05/09/2005 08:26

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beetroot · 05/09/2005 08:27

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ggglimpopo · 05/09/2005 08:28

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Nightynight · 05/09/2005 11:34

Hello ggg,

sorry to hear that things are that bad! I think I'd be considering boarding school too - all girls. The sort of place where a sneaky cigarette in the toilets and a bottle of Malibu is the height of rebellion.

It's kind of reassuringly normal and young, that she went and got someone else to help her face the music though.

I just remembered a girl at my school who did the most huge rebellion, dropped out of school, rough pubs, dreadful boys etc. She's now a university tutor, happily married to a nice man.

I guess the big question is, how long will it last before things get better?

HappyDaddy · 05/09/2005 12:19

Beat her.

expatinscotland · 05/09/2005 12:26

Holy s&^%! I'd have been SO thrown out of our house had I done that. And I knew it, too.

Good luck!

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ggglimpopo · 05/09/2005 14:11

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dinosaur · 05/09/2005 14:16

What a nightmare for you.

Between the age of 16 and 18 I was very, very rarely where my parents thought I was, but they were more naive than you and I never got caught.

I grew out of it and went on to become the epitome of responsibility that I am today.

I wish I had some good advice for you...

Janh · 05/09/2005 14:35

She'll only get better at lying you know. I was like dinosaur and got away with most things (mind you I wasn't as ambitious as her!) (Your DD I mean, not dino )

What is/are your principle objection/s to this weekend, gggl? The oaf himself? The lies? What she might or might not have done with the oaf? All of it? All of it on top of her regular attitude?

BadgerBadger · 05/09/2005 14:46

FWIW, I think boarding school's a great idea and she's a lucky girl to have that opportunity!

The time and space from each other could be the best way to heal your relationship and give each of you a different perspective on everything, aside from helping the behavourial issues.

beetroot · 05/09/2005 20:44

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colditz · 05/09/2005 20:54

Oh dear, I'm going to be unpopular for this but here goes....

She is 16, she is old enough to get married. She can sleep with whoever she likes in the eyes of the law.
She can have babies if she feels like it.

And she knows it. I think the only way to make her realise how (understandably!) pissed off you are is to really treat her like an adult. If you catch her in your purse, take her to the police station and start having her charged with theft.

Make it clear that the price you pay for being treated like an adult is being treated like an adult. Take all her pocket money away and make her get a job.

Passionflower · 05/09/2005 21:48

It's either bording school or the Colditz option.

God how awful for you...

I'd probably give boarding school a go first and if she gets herself expelled then go for the Colditz solution.

How old is the lout by the way? Baybe he'd ditch her if he knew she is only 16.

Passionflower · 05/09/2005 21:48

Oops should be Maybe not Baybe!