This will probably get me into trouble... but how can you have money worries...

[emkana]

... when the wife is a full-time GP and the husband a solicitor? I'm just reading "What about me?" by Kate Figes and the narrator in the book is the GP and she moans about not having enough money to buy a decent car or to fix the roof. Now, I estimate that the combined salary of that couple would be about £150.000 a year, wouldn't it? How can that not be enough????????
I know, I know, the woman is the narrator of the book and so it's subjective and you spend what you have so it never feels enough and all that...
but still it puts my back up, am I supposed to empathize with the narrator now over her troubled lot or what???

expat, i thnk we had a similar chat a while ago. which was why i said, that i dont know about mn, but i have met such people in rl. and to be honest, it doesnt mean they are not good parents, because one mom i know fits the stereotype perfectly, but in my opinion is a far better mom than most i have met.
i jjust dont like being made to feel that just because i live in a nice house, and have had a cleaner previously, and two cars, i have no problems. anyone who has read any of my relationship threads will know just how messed up my life is.

I'm sure they aren't a big deal for most people. Good for them! I hope they know how fortunate a situation that is.

ANY type of mortgage, however, is a big deal for millions of working poor people who struggle to pay high rents and can't get subsidised housing b/c of extreme housing shortages.

It's just a fact of life like any other.

But when folks take one out that too much for their income and then grouse about it, well, it doesn't make a lot of sense to some people who can't get one at all . . .

k, stitch, but this thread was started about money problems. not relationship ones.

but in rl most of wouldnt have this conversation. unfortunatly we all make judgements based on what we see, and on mn, we cant see all those little clues

yes, but that ws because i read someone saying about money and man issues together. i guess i am just a bit stressed, and was never particularly articulate to begin with.

enid (and i don't want to start an argument here) but have you seen the house prices lately? it's ok for me (and you i would guess) who bought back in the good old days but the prices now are ballistic. I bought a decent house 8 years ago when i was just a young poor backpacker, now i've got 70% equity... for doing nothing but living in my house!

i know we couldnt afford to buy our house now. and we only bought it four years ago.
dh spent a lot of time energy playing on the stock market to get together the money for the deposit. a lot of luck was involved of course. but i agree daddycool. houseprices are ridiculous.

my friend is a qualified surgeon, she cant afford to buy a house.

no I agree, house prices are bonkers

nice of Tony Blair to give tax relief on second homes now - hmmm Dorset house prices are set to rocket again as villages die while all the houses are bought up as tax dodges by rich Londoners who never actually visit and all the local people get pushed out of the area

The average price of a property round here is mental. We can't even afford a studio flat!!!!!!! We'd get a mortage for somethng like 85k, and the avaerage price is about 3 times that. I really think something needs to be done. Its just ridiculous

Some people are frivelous with money, can't we just all accept that as true?

A few years ago I was whinging that we couldn't afford a 4 bedr house (which I really wanted). Friend I was telling this to got very annoyed because she had debrs, and had to borrow money from her parents to even put a deposit down on a 2-bed semi, and we were able (eventually) to buy our 4-bedr house for cash (although not at all in the area where I wanted to live).

But half of my whinging was "how can we have so much money and still not be able to afford the house we want, where we want it" I didn't know whether to give up on 4 beds or to live in a less des area. I just wanted sympathy for the fact that I was frustrated, not that I was poor.

Also, she had previously had a chunk of money from a house sale, that she blew on a holiday in America. I never judged her for that, I'm glad she had a holiday of a lifetime. But why did she have to resent me for feeling financially insecure when I had a lot more money than her, which is partly because I'm more careful about my money?

we aren't friends any more...

debrs=debts.

one of the great things about mumsnet is that you can come on here and read the point of view of someone who is at the other end of the scale, whether you're rich or poor. And have frank exchanges about being rich or poor.

Ive got nothing against rich people; I only resent then when they start moaning about how little money they've got We're getting quite rich ourselves now, after years of poverty; we've got a washing machine and a hoover now.

Yes, do agree, house prices are crazy, we were very luck in that respect. Bought our first property when we were 20, made a small profit on that and bought the house we are in now 5 years ago, its now worth £350+, we paid no where near this and there is now way know that we could afford to buy this house. Its a nice house, just the right size for us, but not a mansion exactly. Looking back, it helped us as we started so early, wouldnt be where we are now in terms of property if we didnt buy when we were so young.

Hey, I never said anything about extra cars. We have 2, and when dps clutch went he had to buy the clutch, and sneak a look in the Haynes manual at Halfords and work out how to fit it himself.

I know I couldnt afford to buy our house now and we bought 3 years ago. Also couldnt afford to buy now as dp was made redundant last year. So thnak all my gods that we managed to scrimp and save up a deposit before then. If we had to pay rent wed be stuck in a tiny cramped flat rather than our lovely spacious (compared to a flat) 2up/2down. Luckily I never got used to having money so lifes no different now than ever.

Now all I need to to get dp to understand atha just cos there is money in the bank it doesnt mean he can spend it COS THATS THE MONEY FOR THE MORTGAGE/CT etc etc so no we cant have steak this week its lentil burgers and beans as usual

Also, have been in debt, I know what it's like, and am coming out at the other side. I actually do better now, on my part time wage, dp has had no wage for over a year as he has been in and out of hospital.

All our furniture is second hand but lovely. A lot of dd's and my own clothes have been second hand, but we are clean and smart.

Not read all posts but I wouldn't have much sympathy for the narrator either. I understand that people spend what they earn and that even when earning a lot you can have cash flow problems and a small disposable income. BUT that is because those people have chosen to spend their money on other things - mortgage, cars, schoool fees, holidays so imo have no place to whine about lack of funds. If the situation is that dire, it would be very easy to free up cash.

At the moment, we are budgeting like crazy and feel 'skint' - but I wouldn't dream of carrying on about being poor - whilst it's costing us a fortune and leaving us with less disposable income than we'd like right now, we are more than fortunate to be able to move house while our other hasn't sold yet, to run 2 cars, to have Sky+, to book foreign holidays...

I think it's downright insulting for people in the narrators position to balk about being skint.

It really annoys me when people go on about how much their house is worth now, a lot of my relatives do this say "we bought our house for 45K now it's worth 100K!!" but so are all the other houses in the area so in a way it's all relative, if they wanted to move up the ladder it would be virtually impossible so whats the point in boasting about how much your house has gone up in value so has the whole country!

We have moved from London to Scotland and have bought a cheaper house than the one we had (bigger house though) there is no way we could have afforded a 3 bed house in London so we opted to downsize and come back home. We have actually lost money in doing this (long long story) but so many people try and guess how much we have made from our flat in London, they come right out and ask I usually say "enough" and that pisses them off a bit. I hate people asking how much we have paid for our new house as well. I also feel a bit funny talking about money etc.

I only listed the approx value of our house to emphasize how hard it must be for people to get on the property ladder, we couldnt affor it now so how the hell do people starting out afford mortgages.

we have had to accept a lot of financial "help" from my mother & stepfather. money is the only issue that dh & i argue about; money & my mother & stepfather's power over us.

it is impossible to have an honest conversation about money without anger & bitterness. so many of us are worried about money, whether we have "a lot" or "not enough" or "barely enough to survive on".

AS my brother the high flying, obscenely high earning bachelor London lawyer, night time popular London club DJ says
I'm just broke at a higher level

They don't, jenkel, which is why the number of first time buyers has tanked to an all-time low.

lol piffle

sorry but I think that is funny

well the morgage me and DH could comfortably afford would be about £40/£50 K on his wage alone - as if u can buy a house for that, 4 yrs ago when were were lookin we were spoilt for choice.

now if we want to buy we have to ask our parents to help us or get a morgage we can't afford to repay - where's the logic?