Tea Room the Tenth: Tea and cake and rock and roll

[MadBadandDangerousToKnow]

Welcome back to the tea room.

In the search for the perfect venue, we have now decamped to a rambling country estate. The once-decaying castle, now restored, is a boutique hotel, popular with rock and roll gentry and visiting bishops, and the tea room (which never closes) is located in a tastefully converted barn. The charming garden contains a duck pond and ends in a haha. We need the haha, of course, to stop the bison trampling the herbaceous borders. Mellors the gardener is, as ever, in charge of the grounds.

Please come and join us for a celebratory drink.

I was trying to cast my mind back, to remember why the bishops were wearing swimming trunks, but the thought is so alarming that I may just have a sherry to steady my nerves.

Anyone for a snifter?

Am not sure about the sherry, but a G&T would go down well!

Hmm. Have we unpacked the crate of booze yet? Ah, yes. Of course. The first thing that Mellors did this morning was to set up and fill the cocktail cabinet. So here's a gin and tonic. Would you like ice and a slice?

Yes please, that would be wonderful!

Ah, G&T, just the job!

I am going somewhere lovely and posh, DH has (from his sick bed) booked us a weekend away for our wedding anniversary. There will be cocktails and dinner and spa treatments! Hurray! He is also very pleased because the lady on the phone said he sounded to young to be having a tenth wedding anniversary.

DD seems to be settling nicely into Year 1, came home with a list of all the clubs they can do, and wants to do art club, which suits me as it would give me a little extra time at work on a Thursday ... and it's with her adored Year R teacher, so win-win.

Oy! Quick, give me another G&T before Jacksmama nicks it!

I knew it! We move to a castle frequented by rock stars and, the next thing we know, everyone's flirting with Mellors - are you still wearing that dress, Mary? - and stealing drinks.

I am shocked.

And who is that, having a floodlit lesson with Mellors out on the tennis court?

Well, that was certainly a workout! And some tennis, too!

A snifter? Excellent!

DCMB, good news indeed re DD and the have-it-away-weekend . Here it's the Battle of the A Level Syllabus plus working out the logistics of playing for two rugby teams. And the small matter of the French Scandal, of course.*

• "it" of course being "the break" and not what you were thinking

** What French Scandal, do I hear you say? The one involving the small matter of none of son's year getting a French grade properly awarded...

Sounds lovely, dontcallmebaby, I'm jealous!

I slipped out of the dress earlier, I'd put too much starch in, and it was rather uncomfortable for evening wear. I am now in a little black sparkly number.

Eek. I am very under-dressed for our first cocktail party in the new venue. You are putting me to shame, Mary.

I too am envious of DCMB's weekend of lurve. We will soon have notched up 15 years of awful wedded bliss.

Has the Fine Lad stayed at the same school, Amber, or moved to sixth form college? MadBadBaby has chosen two after school clubs this term and we now have a letter inviting us (well, her) to sign up for violin lessons. Must pop over to DIY/property to ask about the likely cost of sound-proofing!

Hi all -

WE DID IT!!!!

Actually what an impressive way of organising a first day of school... check this out if you will...

Half class today and basically one TA per child!

DD thought it was fab and was especially impressed that there is an office at her school and a dog puppet her teacher has!

It is lovely here I really like the new tearoom....

BOy and I survived new toddler group( in next village), with no wounds. Boy had a minor paddy, but nowt to bad, he just didn't want to share the cooker while he was making me a "pancake". Trying another toddler group tomorrow. The one in our village this time, tho as we live at opposite end of village I think the 2 are equal distances from home.

Boy has now met one of teh children he will be at preschool with on friday. And we found there are ballet classes at teh village hall, going to try boy with them next week.

So, now ,all that is settled, I'm on teh sofa with a book, a large G&T ( just to be sociable you understand) and mellors is giving me a fine foot massage. bless him.

Great news about toddler group and school, UniS and Tea. Cheers!

Can I ask a foreigner-type question?

What's with all the paranoia I've been reading about re: "The School Run" (please note capitals) and how you dress for it?

Is this one of those things I will inevitably learn once I have a school-age child, or is it a cultural thing (U.K. vs Canada)?

It seems to me you either walk your child to school in whatever is appropriate for the weather, or you bung said child in the car which means you can wear your PJ's because no-one will see you.
I'm already having nightmares about being fully dressed and made up at some ungodly hour in the morning for the sole purpose of getting Jackbaby to school.

I am not a morning person.

Well, I'm not entirely sure, but this is my interpretation.

There is a belief that other mothers, while dropping their children at school, will be appraising the other mums and making harsh judgments of those who are insufficiently chic/fashionable/glamorous/made-up. Therefore it is essential to look groomed at the school gate and (preferably) to have the perfect school run dress. There are many MN threads devoted to this.

How widespread this belief is and how many people subscribe to it, I don't know. How many of the MN threads are in earnest I don't know. Some of them, I think, must be spoofs. But I'm not sure.

Speaking as a veteran (in every sense) of the school run, it seems to me that most of the people standing around in the playground are too tired or stressed (last minute searches for shoes and homework) to be bothered by what other people are wearing. And the ones who are smartly dressed are probably on their way to work, rather than trying to psych out the other parents. That said, I did resolve once MadBadBaby was a toddler that I was no longer going to flop around in jeans and a fleece. I heart my jewellery and make-up.

Anyway, this has taken me ages to type and I imagine someone's posted a much more succinct reply now, Jacksmama!

The School Run paranoia, including The School Run Dress is a fiction invented by mad people on MN, and does not exist in real life. Well, there is a bit of weirdness around hanging about waiting for kids, and talking to various people, or not wanting to talk to people, but the whole what-you-wear thing - haven't experienced it.

Actually one cultural difference is that if you do the school run in a car and PJs someone WILL see you because there aren't any carpool lane type things (have a British friend in the US experiencing all that) where you can chuck your child out and send them into school, you do have to park and get out with the child.

I don't do the morning school run, I do the afternoon, and with a few exceptions I do it in whatever I've worn to work that day. Then I come home and change before I get food over myself, or a kitten attacks me. I wasn't working for the first month or so DD was at school, and I did make 'an effort', but just to look nice and presentable, and generally the kind of person I would want to talk to at the school gate!

Ooh, I've just remembered, I do personally know the person who started a thread asking what she should wear to her allotment, and she swears she was genuine, so not all mad what-should-I-wear questions are a fiction.

Hm. I can't remember the last time I wore a dress.

Yes I can. To a wedding in July.

I own 2 dresses. No, 3. No, 2, I think.

Crap. Must acquire more by the time Jackbaby is in school.

Ha, I have never experienced a school run yet, miniT being too small of course, but I have read about these competitive mamas in a number of chicklit drivel novels. I think maybe this is a case of RL imitating art, rather than the other way around? It seemed to stem from the upper echelons of London and New York society though, rather than yer average village out in the suburbs/sticks, so I guess it's not a major problem

This being Mexico, land of women wearing too much makeup when even doing the washing, I shall be woefully underdressed and undergroomed for the school run once my time comes. I take comfort in the fact that this was ever so in all the big social/ work occasions I have ever atttended in Mexico. I will be the wierd foreigner once more (despite having my Mexican passport....)

PS. Amber, your new email address just doesn't wwrk. I've tried a variety of things but my messages keep coming back.. can you send it toome again?

Catita, use Amber's old email address. Amber has had problems with the new one.

I live in a rural community, and people don't dress up for the school run. Its still all very "judgy" though, but for different reasons!

Champagne breakfast on the terrace, anyone?

Fabulous Mary - the pastries taste delicious with the champers.

Day trip to Ireland today. Long day for about 3 hours actual work.

Yup, old email still works. New one is temperamental.

Boy is still at same school as before, thank goodness.

There's a protocol for what to wear on the school run?! Now I find out, 12 years later!

That gym in the castle conservatory is very good! Really enjoyed the workout there yesterday, though what a mix-up over the swimming lessons vs tennis lessons! Off exploring the far reaches of the castle later - the dark haunted looking bit with the old bats in it (or it will have when I get there )

Is there anything left for a champagne brunch?

I'm glad you explained about the confusion between swimming and tennis lessons, Amber. I couldn't understand why you spent much of yesterday flaunting yourself wearing a teeny-weeny bikini.

Thumb - I think you're exactly right about life imitating art in the context of the school run dress. It was (as best I can recall - the book wasn't very memorable) a feature of life as depicted in Notting Hell.

Jacksmama - Go and buy some dresses. Now. Far less faff about matching/coordination - just pull the thing over your head and you're good to go.