Welcome to the Seventh Heaven Tea Room (BYOB. Biscuits, crisps and cake provided)

[Catitainahatita]

Hello and welcome to the seventh incarnation of the tearoom.

If you have found us by chance and/or curiousity you must know that the tearoom is a virtual safe haven for all those seeking a friendly word, a good cuppa and plenty to snack on. By virtue of its magic nature, no food can cause any physical damage, so chocolate, alcohol, transfat and all such can be consumed guilt- (and magically calorie-) free.

We have a wide range of soft-furnishing to relax on; a lovely garden with a swing and a ha ha; a variety of animals; a spa and (for some unknown reason) an apidistra.

Everyone is welcome, if you have one child, ten or none at all. We are a tolerant and fisticuffs-free zone. Instead we employ our energies swooning at Mellors the Gardner cum handiman thinking a silly things to get up to.

Please come in and say hello. You never know, you may end up joining us ...

Daisy - it is JUST the right time of year to start wandering down the garden in bare feet first thing in the morning - lots of dew - and its still SO COLD at that time!!!

Amber - thanks for those suggestions - I will give her a ring tonight and pass them on. Its so difficult - she's not well herself which doesn't help matters. Her daughter has been coming to our house on and off for 6 years and has never spoken to me - I don't push, and make sure that try not to expect any responses back - but also do include her in conversations etc. Last time she did manage to see the photos on our camera about ds's birthday cake - so felt that we almost had a bit of a breakthrough there. Its really difficult to know what to do to not make her feel any more uncomfortable...

Hello all from the bunker:

Its a good job this is a virtual tearoom. My Dr. wrote baack yesterday and said that the best thing to do would be to stay in the house and leave only if totally and utterly necessary. It turns out that the antiviral drugs that seem to be working on the swine flu are contraindicated (is that even an English word? It's an anglised fomr of the Spanish and means not recommended) for pregnant women. Fabulous.

Is also 40+ degrees now and the house is an oven. [overhot emoticon]

Tea I'll head over to that thread and put on my best Alisdair Cooke voice to give the news.

Racing Hope you survived the reports. Perhaps putting salt into your job share teacher's coffee might make you feel a littel better [wink[ [very childish emoticon!]

Donk has just been talking snails on another thread - offering to bring some... I declined on the basis of already having a surfeit... One evening last summer for some reason I went down the garden quite late (8.30/9pm?) - in my gardening shoes - and on the way down and back up again, managed to jump on 80 (no, that's not a typo, and I wasn't going out of my way particularly), yes, 80 snails on the way. Slugs are more difficult as they just tend to squash into the rather moist lawn - but snails are very satisfactory

Snails?!
I go and have a cup of tea and snails appear from nowhere.

Donk: can you explain?

Avast behind, me hearties! Oh, it's mine ...

Best not have that extra piece of cake after tea, I think...

at Amber's vast behind. Not as vast as my own, I fear.

Note to self: Must ask Mistle for diet tips.

Apparently, I am reliably told, if a piece of cheese is cut in half, all the calories fall out. I have tested this on a small slice this evening, but I'm not convinced

A frisky little Cabernet Sauvignon, anyone?

(Do remind me never to tell you of the time I nearly rammed my old boss's Swan 57 aground in the Med )

Welcome back, Justabout!

Priest Hole? Well, currently it's being used by pirates to store a large stash of illegal brandy, as far as I can tell.

.but we can always set Mellors on them for you if you need it back?

No time to grab a glass of wine and a slice of definitely no calorie cheese, then?

Certainly Catita - 'tis a well known fact that Mistle thrushes eat snails - and use a stone as an 'anvil' on which to break the shells so that they can eat them....

I just thought that Mistle has been so kind in keeping me supplied with Carrots in the tea room that I would reciprocate and provide her with some tasty snails.

Justa - the priest hole is still available to those in need - i believe the last inhabitant was Amber.

I like the idea that Justa is being all mysterious. I hope she hasn't been given the Black Spot....

Not sure we want Mistle eating snails in here do we Donk? I mean carrots, hay and tea in galvanised buckets are one thing, but snails?

Amber how do you feel about the Autism gene? It makes me feel a bit weird. All so called gene stuff does. I watched the X men tother night when the mutants could be "cured" and amidst the toshy fun there were some real moral issues - not suggesting any other parallel of course....

• Twiglets in bowl - check
• One, Two racing pigs snuggled on the sofa munching happily - check
• Bison tethered in the orchard - check
• NMBs dancing sea shanties on the deck in teeny tiny wooden clogs - check
• Mellors doing bugger all getting ready for a tango lesson with MadBad - check
• Fresh hay and carrots out - check
• Fire lit - check

All very pleasing really - do pull up a chair

Oh, I left the snails in that bucket over there with the lid on...

Where's the lid gone?

What do you mean it's empty now - where have all the snails for Mistle gone?

I think that the NMBs are using them as new steeds...

I'm quite happy sticking with the lewd rolls, cakes, flapjacks, scones, muffins....

Diet tips - not sure that I'm a good person to advise... I seem to be able to eat the number of calories (in appropriate foods) which should mean I lose weight but put weight on... I have managed on weightwatchers before - but only by having the minimal number of 'points' per day. The few weeks I managed to lose the most weight were the ones where I used most of my points on alcohol ()

Out of idle curiosity I did the AQ test... I got 24. higher than teh average computer scientist!!! eeek, I'm married to one of those. I did score high in the geek test too, tho he scored higher. ( teh husband that is).

OH well, I like my life and my husband and we seem to rub along well enough with teh rest of teh world.

DOnk, have you taken those snails awy yet?? can I get down off teh sofa with out risking a crunch under foot? There better not be any slugs in here... I hate slugs, one slug and I'm up in teh rafters with NMBs,

OH heck, there are snails in eth rafters.... eeekkkkk, where is safe??? CAN slugs swim in brandy?

Unis - no, they die happy!

Don't worry UniS, the NMBs seem to have taken the Snails for a wonderful ride in the light of the silvery moon... you can come out of the priest hole!

just to make you feel better, UniS, I got 26 on the AQ test. I have no clue what DH would get but I would bet any money it would be lower than mine !

snails... ugh... slimy things!

43 is a more decent score to get on an AQ test. You're not trying hard enough . I suspect you'd do equally differently to me on the EQ and SQ tests too!

Daisy, there's been a big debate in the SN bit about the autism gene thing. Like most of us with an ASD, I'm worried. Not because we don't want people's lives made easier and them to have the maximum opportunities in life, but because essentially it's has the potential to become a eugenics situation. It is more than a little like finding the gene for people who are gay and suggesting that we could help them improve their quality of life by giving them gene therapy so they're not gay any more, or eliminate them before birth . We've moved way, way past that as a whole society, thank goodness. But not with 'diffabilities', as Wendy Lawson phrases it.

People see the worst cases of extreme behaviour in autism (representing about 10-20% of us) and imagine that we all must have that quality of life and that outcome and all need a cure ASAP. Not so.

So much careful thought has to be done. The trouble is, the same genes seem to code for genius (which is not the same thing as having an ASD). Normally you end up with genius. Sometimes you end up with an ASD and genius. Sometimes you end up with an ASD and no genius at all. So if you take those genes out of the gene pool, what does it do for the rest of society? Yes, you've eliminated people with autism , but there go your scientists, world-class lawyers, etc too.

I value every person at any level of intelligence, ASD or not, and society really does need its experts. I see it as a potential disaster on every level.

Anyway, that's too much thinking for breakfast time.

Morning all - damp and a bit miserable here. Weather was gorgeous in Helsinki - a bit chilly, but really sunny. Thus we counteracted a lot of sitting in the office with healthy walks to and from the office and a swim and sauna (then a cheeky glass or two with dinner).

Software has made it through the engineering release which is fabulous (it is large and complex with lots of groups involved so even though my paperwork was OK and no major bugs, you can never be sure about everyone else). So just the regulatory approvals to go - which is more nerve wracking in some ways.

DS has moved to the heady heights of the preschool class now. They decided to give him a trial a bit early and he kind of refused to leave.

DH actually looked at his diary for May the other day. For 6 months I have told him that this month was not a good one, but he managed to ignore it. He was not impressed by my schedule.

DH also needs surgery on his hand - has developed a growth on a tendon. I hope it won't mean more than a week of not driving

Sorry, don't get that high a score (only 21...)

Perhaps its because it is first thing in the morning?

Morning. Raining here, too and there must be many many many slugs and snails out enjoying themselves.

I once had a pet thrush. A friend accidently destroyed the nest when builidng a barbecue and by the time he gave to to me the chick had been out of the nest for hours and there was no way it could be given back to its mummy. I raised it on tiny earthworms to start with, then discovered you could give it little strips of heart or beef and hard-boiled egg yolks mashed up with digestive biscuits and vitamin powder. When it got its feathers it learnt to fly around the sitting room and sat outside in the sun in a cat cage watching the other birds. I once put in some snails just to see what would happen and it immediately started trying to bash them open - obviously instinct. Cue a week or so discovering snails' best hiding places round the garden. I let it go when it seemed to be good at flying indoors and saw it around the garden for a while, not quite as nervous as other birds but certainly not coming too close. The next summer there was a fairly bold thrush about with some teenaged thrushlets, then noting since. Maybe future generations moved away to warmer climes or somewhere with better satellite reception ...

Anyway, end of Nature Hour for today.

Sending a virtual jug of iced mint tea to Catita and putting another one in the tea room fridge. Not exactly suitable for this weather but lovely with the fresh mint in the garden and very good, alledgedly, for us ladies of a certain age ...

amber, well-said about the genetics thing - I have read about it and I think it is ludicrous that they can even suggest they have found an "autism gene" (headlines, meeja-style) - the combination of factors required, that might in 2/3 of cases involve that particular gene, does NOT make it a cast iron situation, as even Simon Baron Cohen points out.

I get soooooooo pissed off about this "let's find the gene and cure it" attitude to everything; what a load of bollix! The rampant headlines at the time of "ooh look at us, we've mapped the human genome completely, say goodbye to disease in the near future" made me spitting mad. We don't even properly understand the genetics for eye colour, fgs, and that's relatively simple!!

OK, rant over, this is the tea room, have a muffin and a cup of lovely double choc hot chocolate and calm down.........