Tea room the 5th - welcome to the yurt

[UniS]

Welcome to the tea room. A warm welcome to everyone, whether you have one child, none, or ten. This is a tea-and-muffin or booze-and-sofasorcanapees sanctuary for all. But certain standards of behaviour continue to apply - anyone engaging in fisticuffs will be ejected by George Clooney, ably assisted by Mellors the Gardener.

You have found us- did you like teh slide/ bridge over teh HaHa. Teh priest hole is still available, its just over there.

Mellors and I have erected the yurt, strewn rugs around and good a good fire going in the wood burner. The place is feeling toasty and warm with not a draft to be felt.The kettle is now singing away on the hob. selection of teas for all taste on the shelf along with the hand made by potters mugs. Mellors very ably fitted teh yurt window with a window sill onto which can be placed a selection of pot plants and george.

Can someone sort out RP ( who I think came over with the sofa) and plump up the hay pile for donk.

A Previous incarnation of Tea room may be found here

What's with all the willy jokes and innuendos? This thread is becoming like a Frankie Howerd sketch!

I'll have some soup please. And a lewd roll!

afternoon ladies!
Am glad CMOTD worked out amber's abilities with TP as I was also a bit confused by that!

But I would say this about Tom Holt - imho, he tries too hard and achieves a lot less than Sir Pratchett. I did start a collection of his books but gave up as they weren't getting any better. i did quite like Ye Gods though.

daisy, i might be missing the point, or you might have done my usual thing of mistaking La Winslett for Cate Blanchett - not sure, please enlighten!

bscon sarnie here too please - i have a small sleepy monkey impeding my typing here so any sustenance would be welcome!

Madbad - its just that ds really likes helping to make rolls, and he likes making them into things like rockets...

Anyway, haven't you got used to it by now? I don't think that this morning's conversation has been particularly - particularly given what some other threads get up to, even in the morning on a weekday...

And, yes, I did actually have to retie some groups of balloons for that wedding....

Mistle I love a good lewd roll. My Mum used to draw balloons on the outside of birthday cards until one day she did two rounds and a long one for a teen boy cousin by mistake

Thumb it was the quote "now B-R-E-A-T-H-E" that did it. But of course, I was mistaken, when Kate collected her Golden Globe she said "GATHER!!!" It was late. I was tired. Sorry!!

I don't think we've been badly behaved this morning by our standards even. Mellors has put his Pole nicely back on the shelf.... or was it MadBad that gave it a shove

this is for MadBad

That's kind of you, Daisy. I think. There's no sound on this computer!

Now, don't get me wrong. I have a very end-of-the-pier sense of humour. Ooh-err, Missus! But ever since Amber introduced Ivor Biggun into the conversation and Mistle turned up with the lewd rolls I've been wondering who'll be along next - Benny Hill being chased by a group of scantily-clad nymphettes, perhaps?

Hang on a minute, there seems to be a commotion down beyond the haha, on the beach.

But the lewd rolls have been around for many threads... Surely you must have got used to ds's modeling skills by now?

Oh no! I'll have the Benny Hill theme tune playing in my mind the rest of the day now

I love the Benny Hill chase tune - very un-PC I know but still! DH is very familiar with it too - he was very big in Australia, apparently,

Daisy - thanks for the elucidation - I get it now!

I'd love a lewd roll and some soup. Have just abandoned DS with his tuna bread slices - he has made tuna mudpies with it and is smearing it around the highchair and the kitchen bits he can reach

I'm sorry if I have come across as Mrs Prude, that wasn't my intention in the least. After all, I have (ooh-er) been enjoying lewd rolls with Mellors for many weeks! It just amused me that we had so many saucy references in quick succession. I do hope MJ won't give up his modelling and baking.

Has anyone seen Madbad - I thought she just nipped out with some lunch for Mellors, but she's been gone an awfully long time... and I just knocked on the shed door as it seems to be locked from the inside and I can't seem to find Mellors anywhere

[Shock]

What ever is going on in here? There are some very funny nosies coming from the shed and Mistle is hiding behind the couch with her fingers in her ears.

Dasiy LOL at Catitawithabunita, I think I'll wait until after the magic 12 week mark before making the change. Thanks for the concern about me; I should be fine as long as the pregnancy goes well. I just have to be very careful about not overdoing things, checking my blood sugar regularly etc. The worst thing is that, last time at least, I stopped being able to tell my blood sugar was running low. This is very dangerous as I discovered to my cost: you can collapse or fit when your glucose gets below a certain point.
Hight blood sugar is very dangerous for the baby, especially in the first and last trimester. In the first because high blood sugar might interfere with the development of internal organs and brain. In the last because, he gets used to having a huge sugar rush daily and on popping(!) out suddenly hsi supply plummets (with the associated dangers of fits etc).

Books: I'm a Prachett fan, my favourites are any containing the fab Sam Vimes and his missus. Also a sucker for the feisty maidens in Georgette Heyer. I second the Grand Sophy and also suggest The Nonesuch. Other wise I like Ian Rankin and the delightful Lindsay Davies: her heroes Falco and Helena are just great (plus from a MN angle, they are also parents!)

Da - na- na
nana na nur na
da nana na nur na

da na na na na.....nur nur nur

na na na na....

Oh I see now; it's just a typical day in the tearoom yurt.

Crikey moses!

I laughed at Benny Hill - I still find myself singing the song when trying to get everyone whizzed up and running out of the house (like getting to nursery on time) it is a very speedy song, if rather inappropriate!

Not sure about those Guineas! We need the Bison to come and calm them down! Or the NMBs, what's happened to them?

Oh, I can spy them, they are playing in the hawthorn bushes singing "Here we go gathering Nuts and May" it's rather sweet actually. Their little carrots are parked up on the side, they are waving their little arms about, their big boy pants are cast aside and they are back to their naked ways... oh, look, the tomahawks have been put down, now is a chance to confiscate them!

Yes, there was a spurt of activity when we moved, then it calmed down a bit - its got back to normal again now hasn't it. I see MB still hasn't made an appearance - and Mellors doesn't seem to have done any of the gardening that was on his 'to do' list for today...

Do you think anyone should tell the nmbs that the May isn't out yet, and it should be knots really not nuts - so the peanuts that they are juggling with rather skillfully are not really appropriate for the song? Mind you, I'm not going to be the one that tells them - their tomahawks aren't far enough away from them... I had wondered where that big bag of peanuts had got to though!

OK, I will read up on what has been happening today in a minute, but for now I need some suggestions.

I am rather fraught. WS has grizzled all day with her cough. she won't let me put her down for a second, so I have to do everything with one hand. Every time she cries the dog whines. Every time she cries DH gets irritable because she is crying. Every time DH gets up off the sofa the dog gets in his place and DH gets cross. WS won't drink. I have been resorting to bribery with garlic croutons (her favourite food) and chocolate eggs to get small amounts of liquid down her. Now her (not very wet) nappies are getting rather dark and smelly because she is not drinking. The mess, heaps of toys and clutter are building up in a way I am finding overwhelming. Aged Parent is miserable and the arthritis is very bad. It's cold outside. I have already smacked the dog for whining and shouted at WS for grizzling. I feel like the worst parent ever.

Any ideas????

RS - much sympathy and a cup of tea for you to start with.

Is Dh ill too? If he is too ill to put up with an ill toddler in the room he should go to bed. There, that's one problem out of the way. He will feel a lot better for some nice quiet time and hopefully some extra sleep.

Will WS not drink anything of any sort? How about melon or orange pieces. What about a smoothie or a milk shake? Jelly is a really good way of getting fluid into them - as is sorbet!!!! Is she calpolled up to the limit - and have you tried baby nurophen in conjunction? Baby olbas oil is good for relieving congestion in a slightly less harsh way than normal olbas oil.

Good luck - let us know if anything helps.

Lots of sympathy and a refill on your cuppa.

Tinned fruit with yoghurt?
Ice-lolly/ice-pop?

If her wee is getting brown and smelly it is a sign of dehydration and you should be careful. Have you rung the GP/NHS Direct?

Good point about the calpol. I may have let it lapse over the day, although she had nurofen this morning. She has had a few grapes (basically liquid, aren't they?) and loves oranges. Just found three bottles of olbas oil when attempting some tidying. Actually looking for super strength though, rather than less harsh.

DH is not really ill any more; he is feeling rather better, although still awaiting results of CT(?) scan. He just feels uncomfortable when WS is ill and therefore needs someone to be grumpy at.

WS is now sharing a bowl of popcorn with me (liquid content 0).

But what the hell is the dog up to??

Catita - did I say congratulations? Things a bit hazy due to lack of sleep. Anyway, can imagine how happy (and apprehensive) you must be. Actually, I think that is a fairly common state from what I have seen of friends when they first find out, whether or not there are other factors.

I tried the GP last time she was ill (or probably actually earlier in ths same illness) and she could only suggest bribery or hospital and a drip.

Will replace the popcorn bowl with fruit and yogurt .