The One and Only Tea Room: Tea, muffins and champagne served at all hours

[BoccaDellaNativita]

Well folks, here we are!

We were on the brink of filling the old thread so I thought we'd better start a new one now. There was a rumour that we were going to be evicted from our old premises, but we managed right at the last minute to get an extension on the lease. So it's business as usual. We're still in our charming old tea room, overlooking our beautiful garden complete with ha-ha and duck pond. And Mellors the gardener.

Please come and join us for a celebratory drink.

In the way that everything in the tea room is however we want it to be, I think the aga is wood-fired, which is one of the reasons that Mellors must spend so much time shirt-less, wielding an axe and chopping wood.

BabyBocca does not look like this poppet so much as she behaves - and especially argues and debates - like her.

Big aww! at racingchild looking like Lucy in the Narnia film.

And yes please to hyacinths.

Oh dear Bocca - it's a particularly unpleasant bug. Please help yourself to my dehumidifier which will dry two loads on the airer in an hour.

Life has passed in the CMOT household with no loss of life or temper - Christmas Eve my mums sister came over (they haven't seen each other for 3 years due to general uselessness on both sides) - Aunt hadn't bothered to ring me about this until the morning, so I left it to be a suprise. They seemed really happy, but mum looked so old in comparison (only 5 years older, but looks 15). Brother came over as well as PIL on Christmas day, and MIL was really good about helping out (none of my family did) and tolerating parents. Brother was OK, but of no practical use. Boxing day, went to PIL and saw all the family on that side and fought with the teenagers about what they could put on DVD.

DS is welded to his new tractor - parents bought one of the Rolly Toys John Deere and trailer ones at a bankruptcy sale and he is in hog heaven. Due to weather we haven't been out with it so he is sitting on it and watching TV.

Great to see you again, cmot.

I'm glad that Christmas passed without turning into an episode of Midsomer Murders! In my family, the pattern seems to be that you don't help much or at all in someone else's house (although my dad used to offer to wash up when he was younger and fitter) but as we share the hosting it all evens out in the end. With Signor Bocca's family, it seems to be that guests here sit down and wait for all drinks, meals and entertainments to be produced, but when we go there we are expected to pitch in. Hmm.

The dehumidifier sounds just the ticket. I may investigate buying one for Chateau Bocca as festooning damp laundry around the house has never been my idea of stylish living. Which model would you recommend?

The mulled cider is delicious.

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It's just the sitting waiting for drinks etc that does my head in - although we offer on a regular basis, suddenly my mum will announce that she needs to eat now as her blood sugar is low and expect you to go get something rather than just going to the kitchen. Suppose it's the comparison to having friends to stay where everyone piles in to help with things/put the kettle on/grab beers. When we visit family, help is expected and received.

We have a Misubishi E16 from here. We bought it when we lived in a very damp, small house, and although we don't need general dehumidifying now, its marvellous for laundry as you can dry loads really quickly without turning the house into a chinese laundry. Very economical to run too. I have what I think of as an X wing dryer from Lakeland and put the dehum in the middle, with shirts etc on hangers

You deserve the Quality Street, but please have this box of Thorntons that my brother bought me, even though it clearly states that it contains gluten (which I haven't been able to eat for 10 years)

Ooh, another box of chocolates.

I really need to shift some weight as my mother gave me a very nice blouse for Christmas - the years of mentioning which labels I actually like and wear have paid dividends - but the buttons are rather tight over what on MN I believe one has to call one's norks. And I always vowed I would shoot myself if I reached this dress size, so some real willpower is needed. By the end of 2009 I will be a sylph.

My all time low as far as Christmas house guests was concerned was when I was six months pregnant. We were driving mother- and sister-in-law back to the station after the holiday when MIL commented on how much running around I had done for her and how busy she had kept me. I had been seething for days about how she seemed glued to her chair while I hauled myself up and down the stairs to the kitchen and if our car had had an ejector seat I would happily have pressed the button!

So what was your most inappropriate gift? We've received some corkers in the past, but everything this year has been lovely.

Actually, this year, we haven't had anything naff. Usually my evil SIL buys us some total tat (the year it was a Matalan candle and a bottle of dip that I couldn't eat was a classic), but it seems like BIL finally grew some, and had ordered from our Amazon wishlists - as had everyone else. DH bought me a lovely new camera, so DS has enjoyed wandering round taking pictures of everyone

I am a spoilt and ungrateful woman, aren't I?

Why ?

Oh, and I need to start a diet, or at least more exercise - 2 years of breastfeeding had reduced me to the size of my dreams, but I have put nearly all of it back on, back to my pre pg size, and would prefer to be thinner now that I have experienced it

Well, it just occurs to me that harbouring uncharitable thoughts about my in-laws or about the gifts on which people have spent their hard-earned cash is possibly not in the true spirit of Christmas!

I didn't find that breastfeeding (which I did for 18 months) helped very much with weight loss, or maybe the point is that I would have been even more gargantuan without it. I've just had a term off from going to the gym, so will be getting back to that in January. I'm not aiming for stick-thin, just to get rid of the wobbly bits.

No, but it is terribly frustrating when there are things you would like, appreciate, and use, and you find they have wasted their money on buying something that, at best, will go to Freecycle ASAP. MIL was particularly bad for buying you not quite what you wanted - so DH's requested dark purple shirt in extra tall from Lands End, would turn into a regular yellow shirt from M&S. And speak to me not of the yellow t shirt with cats on that she bought me.

I'd far rather people bought nothing than just stuff

Quite agree about stuff. Am currently planning to offload a scented candle and a photo frame as I just do not want another candle or photo frame (at least not these ones). I am also in rebellion against stuff.

Funny - I found that it was when I stopped breastfeeding that I lost (not enough) weight. The time when I was at my thinnest was just after second mc and - ironically - when I was pregnant for about the first 3 months. I was too scared to eat. All these people complimenting me and I couldn't say why.

Watching Outnumbered out of the corner of my eye on the TV I have cunningly hidden behind the Christmas tree and draped with a chenille throw, in order to get to know BabyBocca.

Glad your Chrismasses were not all at like Midsummer Murders, but it will be deadly dull for The Tearoom, The Movie.

However, Christmas at Chateau Racing will be even less photogenic, due to quarantine regulations. For the entire time dh lay on the sofa and coughed while RC snuffled and snorted and oozed green mucus. Sister dropped in unexpectedly for the day to impart that she has finally realised that she is suffering from depression, which is actually good (realising, not suffering). So all in all, no time for Christmas. No turkey, bread sauce, pudding, presents ... not even any good films on TV!

Anyway CMOT, have you thought about who is going to play you in the movie??

Very slow typing, which is why last contribution is a non sequiteur.

I lied about no presents - parcel came from MIL in France which contained, among other things, a beautifully laundered and folded tea cloth with a hole in it. Also annual tin of foie gras which we never eat and we are running out of people to pass it on to.

RS - sorry to hear you are still a plague pit. DS is oozing too, which I find particularly unpleasant when he launches himself at me and it gets wiped through my hair. The Karvol diffuser in his bedroom s a lifesaver though.

Glad to hear your sister has realised about the depression - we have a friend who suffers, and his real turning point was acknowledging it, and has been much better after that.

I heartily recommend the Christmas compote in the M&S sale. The only sale stuff we bought today was in the food hall, which is a bit sad.

I'd like to think that Elle McPherson would be playing me. The way I feel currently, its more Miriam Margoyles though !

My fascinating fact re Midsomer Murders is that a lot of it is filmed in my parents town, so its a case of spot the location for us. Dad is an extra in a couple of episodes where they needed a tractor driving, and loves to witter on about it all.

I am at the second-hand tea towel with a hole in it. I know antique French linen is chic, but suspect that anything with a hole is exempt from that category!

Foie gras? as they say around these MN parts.

BabyBocca is slightly older, I think, than Karen in Outnumbered but they are very much cut from the same cloth. We only saw half of tonight's episode, sadly.

I saw various trailers which suggested there would be some good films on TV but I haven't found them yet. I did enjoy Narnia yesterday, so it seems very apposite that RC resembles Lucy.

I'm sorry, reeindeersnake, that you are still in quarantine. I had harboured hopes of getting to the shops today (we have a couple of garments given to BabyBocca which need to be exchanged for the correct size) but haven't been able to leave my mop and bucket.

And, yes, Jacksmama, you need to decide who'll portray you in the far-from-dull movie of tea room life.

We must find a role for Miriam Margolies in the film. Did you hear her recently on Desert Island Discs? She is a National Treasure.

Good for him. I too would witter endlessly if it were me. Off to look up Elle McPherson.

Oooops. Keep cross-posting.

Well done to Cmotdad on being in Midsomer Murders. Signor Bocca's home town is also often used as a film set but none of his family have been extras. SIL could play a gnarled old peasant in style of Brueghel.

I saw MM on a couple of things about BlackAdder, and remembered how fab she was.

Dad looks stereotypically farmer - of the sort with their trousers held up with baler twine, and rather grubby round the edges.

Am very at the tea towel. It would be bad enough to be given a tea towel, but an obviously used, damaged and undarned one lifts it all to a new level

In a cunning move, I recorded 'Curse of the Were Rabbit' and not the new Wallace and Grommit.... Nevermind, as DH has days of sport recorded to catch up on anyway. I have been trying to buy things in the sales and failing miserably. I should have bought the suit I liked when in Principles earlier, but couldn't try it on as had sleeping DS strapped to my back - so why didn't I buy it then and take it back ?

Was thinking exactly the same about MM. Could we advertise out there on MN for someone who would like to start dropping in at the tearoom and be played by MM?

Sympathetic about mop and bucket but no practical ideas, even virtually.

Will the new W&G be on BBC iplayer (I guess not)? I've only been housebound for 24 hours and already I'm desperate to get to the sales ....

CMOT, I like the sound of your father very much. Looked up Elle McP - she fits in very well with my mental image of you.

Feel I should defend MIL re holey tea towel. I know she is very well meaning, so more bemused than offended. A family heirloom, perhaps? Or she wrapped it by accident and is at this very moment absent-mindedly drying the glasses with something rather expensive in cashmere?

She is inclined to unload the contents of her cupboards on me send me family heirlooms. I have had gold bracelets, rings with diamonds, broken wooden boxes filled with rather elderly chocolates, primary school projects made by dh ... Due to the language barrier, I never quite grasp the intention behind her gifts. (Also she is as mad as a badger.)

Am orf to bed now, giggling at the idea of racinggrandmere drying the glasses with a cashmere cardigan in (I think) tasteful dove grey.

And do you think we should sack Mellors? Although he has marvellous pecs, when it comes to gardening, he seems only to do the barest (arf arf) minimum. Perhaps Cmotdad could spare us an hour a week and could keep the acre of grass in trim? After all, a ride-on lawnmower is quite like a tractor, isn't it?

No, we CANNOT sack Mellors. He has so many functions. However, CMOT Senior is a great idea, if he would just top the grass occasionally. CMOT might like to think who will play him, unless he would like to play himself?

When will I ever get time to fill in my application for Cannes? Or prepare some lessons for next term??