Would anyone like a cup of tea and a muffin?

[MadBadandDangerousToKnow]

I'm tired and in need of refreshment.

The tea room is now officially open, serving hot chocolate, tea, freshly-squeezed orange juice and a range of home-baked muffins. Tablecloths and crockery are charmingly mismatched antiques (no Cath Kidston here). We overlook an attractive although somewhat overgrown garden, with a distant view of rolling countryside.

Everyone is welcome but house rules dictate that anyone indulging in fisticuffs will be ejected.

Please come in.

Hello all!
How is everyone's Christmas shopping progressing? Apropos of this thread about rude people who give you gifts you've just given the right back because they don't like them, I've started this one : a White Elephant gift exchange so we can all get rid of any awful presents we may receive after Christmas. I nominate the mumsnet tearoom as the venue. (If Bocca says that's ok).

Good mornib everone!

I think I'll just get myself a nice cup of redbush tea. Thank you to Bocca for orgabising caffeine-free alternatives.

Actually, my mother did offer me my old 1/4 size violin for him, but as I was an incompetent violin player at the best of times, I'm not sure I'm ready for it yet. As dad is addicted to car boot sales, we also have a guitar, a full size keyboard, and narrowly missed having a clarinet.

In a seasonal turn, DS has been regaling me with 'I do like to be beside the seaside' this morning. My efforts in the carol department are so far not apparently going in.

Sorry to hear about the family cold RS - after a week of not coughing, DS is back to his impression of a 60 a day smoker. Fortunatly as this has been the normal state of play since he was 6 months old, we get no complaints - unlike when his father has a cold.

Morning all!

Do you think we should start a thread about the inability of modern man to cope with anything more than a slightly runny nose (except when they have a compound fracture and refuse to seek medical attention), or has that already been done? Is there a one child family angle here, I wonder? Is it because of the lower than average number of children in the household that the paterfamilias himself becomes infantilised and reverts to toddlerdom whenever the lurgy strikes?

Well, we're already applying for planning permission for an extension to accommodate the tea room palm court orchestra - and I think we should also invite the Mumsnet Orchestra to play a few gigs here - so I guess we could take it a stage further and apply to build a luxury retreat in our extensive grounds (which, coincidentally, Mellors will be landscaping very soon, if he wants to hold onto his job following recent complaints from customers about the overgrown state of the garden).

But don't forget that the tea room has occasional visits from a massage therapist. In the first couple of days we did also have some Norland nannies on duty but they haven't been seen for a while. I wonder whether they're out in the potting shed with Mellors?

Let me know if there are any problems with the planners in getting consent through for the extension - may be able to help!

Please could i have a nice big mug of tea to warm my hands on

Mistlejunior got up in a funny mood - very uncooperative (which is unusual when breakfast is involved) - it turns out he was having the wobbles at going to a friends house and being left on his own today (school closed) as he has never done that before. I'm hoping that it works well as we should be able to do holiday shares between us - Christmas holidays work out that I don't have to take any leave and just have to look after two extra children on 3 of my holiday days

I do think that Mellors has been tending gardens but I'm not sure its the one tearoom's that he's been concentrating on...

mistlethrush - Yes, it was in the back of my mind that you seem to be very au fait with planning procedures. A professional interest, I surmise?

Christmas holidays are a mixed blessing aren't they? Our local holiday club doesn't 'do' the Christmas holiday but fortunately it quite suits both our employers for us to take some leave between Christmas and the New Year. Otherwise we'd be trading progeny with our neighbours, too!

Anybody want some soup for lunch? I'll go and see what we have in the fridge?

Hi Guys!

what was that about Mellors and his trimming skills I have always thought one should have a beautiful lady garden

HA HA HA actually. that is so not true in RL if anyone came near my fanjo with clippers I think I would be right back in my Hong Kong phoey days!!!

Indeed, the Drama of DS's birth the nurse coming at me with a razor was The Worst Moment

Well, what haven't I missed!

T42, dear, it's Mummy here, and I think it's time you came down out of the loft and left those nice German caroller alone

JM - love your time confusion, is that your one Germanic hangover? Always used to get me Halb Drei being half past 2 not 3!!

Racing, don't you fund Rooibos gives you an upset stomach? Clearly not, so you have any teeth left? That's meant to be sympathetic, and sorry about ill Snake family - I have just got over 2nd bout of vile flu....

Cnut/Cmot, my Anglo Saxon mind has found your name change much funnier than I should

Thrush Family sound like the blooming von trapps and Bocca love the Palm Court thingy

I can contribute piano, drums, bongo drums, African drums (can you spot a theme!!) and various blowy/ hitty/ bangy things. Daisy Villas is Percussion Central, let me tell you!

Rebel - love the dawning of the Cafe Thread as it all unfolds! Good on you for sticking with the madness

Can the chickens do a bit of a dance while we play - you do all know Barnyard Dance don't you? Sarah Boynton best book ever... start and end of Christmas Shopping needs

Umm, what else, thanks for good wishes re funeral, it was strangely upsetting but good to go, etc

Oh, I LOVE christmas by the way

Daisylet had an Angel on his advent calendar today - what did you all have?

JM, I thought we had settled, from Canada you are a Dominatrix? Aren't you?

And you MUST wear check shirts. All the time. And fur lined boots. And hats with flaps for your ears.

Don't you?

Any minute now, Bocca is going to tell me that she doesn't wear Velvet dresses and long flowing capes and sensible fur lined slippers

And Mistle doesn't wear cord trousers tucked into her welly boots with polo neck jumpers and shirts over the top with the sleeves turned back

And Cmot doesn't wear hessian sacking (sorry, you are just forever Anglo Saxon to me!)

And T42 doesn't wear checked pinafore dresses and pastel matching tops and tights with little sprigged flowers on them (and a sack saying SWAG over one shoulder)

and Racing doesn't wear combat trousers and shirts with long swingy necklaces

and rebel doesn't wear tartan

and I shall be so upset. all illusions shattered

Hmm, sorry guys

JM - You probably already know that, although the UK is bombarded with American culture in all its various forms, what we know about Canada is largely confined to what we have gleaned from that TV series about the Mountie (the name of which I can't remember) and this. Consequently, we do all expect all Canadians to wear checked shirts at all times. (In the same way, all Australians must wear a hat with corks dangling from the brim at all times). Please excuse our ignorance.

Daisy - I do of course wear velvet gowns, even to do the housework, but I gave up on capes, shawls and wraps (didn't the poncier shops call them serapes?) when I realised it was like having your arms tied to your sides. My slippers are velvet (one pair shocking pink and one pair black and white spotty cow pattern) and are the last word in chic. Pah!

Now, who's for soup?

Sorry about the pesky thoughtless more than one child questions

When asked, I just say "our family is complete with one child" and then nothing more. I find if you don't offer any answers people can't ask more. It has taken me a long time to learn silence!

oooo, soup please Bocca

what's the flavour today?

and the programme was Due South wasn't it?

I do have one friend who spends a lot of time talking about TTC and then says "but of course, you DECIDED to have only one child didn't you"

Was it Due South? I think you're right but Northern Exposure is on the tip of my tongue too. Was that something different?

Some people never take the hint, do they? Once or twice I said 'well, we did have massive fertility issues, you know' and that shamed the insensitive socially inept enquirers into silence. They probably feared I was going to whip out my fallopian tubes to show them!

We have a large pot of homemade carrot and orange soup and a fresh batch of suggestive 'rocket' rolls. Would that do?

Daisy you're right - no, I don't wear that!!! The earlier description was about right, but not the clothes!

I don't know how, but we FORGOT to open the advent calendar this morning - I think it was because I was having to overcome mistlejunior's wobbles and as a result things got a bit delayed.

Bocca Yes please, soup would be good - warm me up a bit which would also help.

Mistlethrush - I have psychic powers, don't you know? And did you and mistlejunior sign up for the MN Orchestra? MJ's talents deserve a wider audience.

One soup and lewd roll coming up.

Bocca the problem is with the orchestra that we're not really into competitive kazoo playing... MJ would be into competitive saucepan bashing (can you, in fact, imagine any 3.5yo boy who wouldn't want to join in and see who could make the most noise!)

Just been to softplay place (atmosphere-less warehouse full of mums in leggings and Kyles and Kylies which WS loves because she is allowed to climb anything and is not always wrestled to the ground as she is when found on top of the bookcase) and WS actually WENT OFF ON HER OWN.

This is a first and a great relief as she is very clingy prefers my company when out. Then of course the comments are all along the lines of 'well, she is an only child ..'

It was easy to see where she was by the snail trail of snot behind her.

Am strangely excited by combats and swingy necklaces. Have always wanted a 'look', but never been able to identify one for me. Although I think I would feel more at home with jeans tucked into boots look or even velvet dresses (I wish).