The one and only Tearoom, to be sure , it is.

[UniS]

To pinch an intro from the very first one and only tea room thread. in 2009.

The tea room is now officially open, serving hot chocolate, tea, freshly-squeezed orange juice and a range of home-baked muffins. Tablecloths and crockery are charmingly mismatched antiques (no Cath Kidston here). We overlook an attractive although somewhat overgrown garden, with a distant view of rolling countryside.

Everyone is welcome but house rules dictate that anyone indulging in fisticuffs will be ejected.

Please come in.

2011
We seem to have fetched up in Ireland, this place looks remarkably like a pub,There is even a guiness barrel over there. The NMBs are all sporting shamrocks. The mirror ball is here, but I leave teh rest of the unpacking to someone else.

Agh. No camping please. Not my cup of tea at all. Mnd you I have only ever been on the "rain-all-the-time-tent-put-up-over-cow-pat" type camping holidays. It's not the king of experience you treasure; it just gives you a newfound understanding of the horrors of WWI (ie living in the trenches, not the actual warfare bit...)

Q. How do you know if there's an elephant in your bed?
A. Your nose is touching the ceiling.

Ba-da-boom....

Girl wants to contribute a joke to the comedy marathon:

Q: What's the difference between a pile of slugs and school dinners?

A: The plate.

One of my favourite jokes: Two goldfish in a tank, one says the other -"Do you know how to drive this thing?"

DD's:

DD: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
DD: Interrupting cow.
Me: Interr ...
DD: MOOOOOOOO!

This is actually HILARIOUS if you get the timing right. Plus has potential for all manner of interrupting farm animals (Interrupting Chicken is probably my favourite).

Catita how about a glamped-up yurt? Camping pod? Four-poster and luxurious en-suite upstairs in the on-site gastropub?

My favourites:

Did you hear about the hyena that swallowed an oxo cube? It made a laughing stock of itself!

Two snowmen in a field. One says to the other "Can you smell carrots?"

Then there's the joke from tomorrow's sermon:

After a very long and boring sermon the parishioners filed out of the church saying nothing to the preacher. Towards the end of the line was a thoughtful person who always commented on the sermons."Minister, today your sermon reminded me of the peace and love of God!" The minister was thrilled. "No-one has ever said anything like that about my preaching before. Tell me why." "Well - it reminded me of the Peace of God because it passed all understanding and the Love of God because it endured forever!"

My fave so far is the Mary's snowman and the carrots. Ive never heard that one before.´

DCMB: Ok then. As long as we include some mechanism for keeping out unwanted bugs (ie midges) I'll come along and lose my camping prejudices.

Who has the baby sleep dust? Been in bed for an hour, still kicking his feet, sitting up. Lying down, waving his arms....

Oh, and Tee, here's a for you.

I was going to point out to Catita that in the Camp Site of Requirement there woud be no cow pats and all tents would (Tardis-like) contain four poster beds and en-suite bathrooms for anyone who wants them, but DCMB got there first.

Small Bean only has one joke to contribute...

... Why does Father Christmas have a black belt?

... To keep his trousers up!

Tee - and for all.

Q: What weighs one ton and wears glass slippers?

A: Cinderelephant.

q: why did the Banana go to the doctors?

A: because it didn't peel very well

yes to camping. Love it. We're very rough and ready. Oxbloke it may not surprise you to know thinks a chair is a bit too much. We have some tents but only one you can sit up in. For variuos reasons I think we may graduate to something bigger. I'm loving the idea of solar fairy light. Not least theclook on Oxblokes face when I got them out!

He finally fell asleep about 830. Had some lovely ice cream. Thanks for the .

Gwan Oxeye. Get thee to Sainsbo's and buy several strands of these (although it looks as if the BOGOF may be over]].

Keeping out bugs? There will be NO bugs, naturellement. Especially if DD will be putting in an appearance (she is very anti-bug).

I have these solar fairies. I'm very impressed with them, having had some truly naff ones previously from John Lewis of all places - although I should have kept them, as they were advertised as Christmas lights I threw them away in a fit of pique when they didn't work. It's entirely possibly they would have worked in the summer.

My solar phone charger however does appear to NOT work. Gah.

oxeye DD likes that joke! In fact it was the first one that she volunteered to us as a joke, having learned it elsewhere, that was actually funny. No, not just actually funny, but actually a joke, as opposed to a random question followed by an equally random answer.

Please, someone give me strength not to snap at my FiL. Last time we were down he really drove me nuts but he's about to push me over the edge. If I show it it plays into him. For the first time in ages, thanks to a comment he made today, I've been doubting my abilities as a mother. And he's just so damn impatient and makes very hurtful rude comments to/about people around.

Rant over.

Trying to figure out how to incorporate a treasure hunt of the campsite/property and our theme of ducks -- anyone have any suggestions?

Our collection of tents includes 2 you can sit up in, one you can only sit up in if your 5 none of them weigh more than 5 kg. 2 weigh less than 3kg each. I think we may be closer to Oxblokes end of teh camping/ glamping scale than Mauds.

AO- worry not, bruise did not develop. Key stage one child with challenging behaviour. school ARE trying to find working strategies.

Whats yellow and dangerous??

Shark infested custard!

I got to tick off an military bloke today !!! I politely pointed out that I was responsible for doing that and would they please stop helping them selfs to my kit. Then pointly put everything BACK the way it was before they started messing and THEN sorted out teh extra they needed. Their solution had included running a cable across a gap at neck height!

Tee, yay for sleeping Toddlers!

We're going on a duck hunt- you can;t go round it. got to go under, over, through... obstacle course. While carrying a rubber duck baton in the team relay style obviously.

Any one know if you can home make duck call whistles?

Challenge the girls to make up a book of duck jokes. - good for rainy days.

My tent weights 40kg.

seems you can make duck calls with drinking straws! a little try out may be needed.

Instead of a standard whistle

Too funny

I want some! We will really need some for the next tea room camping at the summer festival.

Ooops - I want beautiful flowery lights, not a duck call. Although why not?

Did wonder why we were all going to wear toy duck bill calls....

Our camping is pretty basic - fridge is a bucket of cold water in which we float the milk bottle, for example - as we are limited to what we can fit in the car (no trailer or roof box). I am always and and at what some of the people on the camping threads manage to take with them.

My solar fairy lights are all entwined around things in the garden - I just got rather wet weaving the latest acquisitions through the jasmine - so won't be coming camping with us!