Mum and daughetr constantly ill after she started nursery

[Beya4567]

Since my daughter started nursery last November me and her have never been so ill..

Every few weeks I have had a cough,flu like symptoms ..I'd feel better for a few days and then come down with it again ive had coughs,colds,flu conjuctivitus in both eyes...I'm begginging to worry something is wrong with me..I'm just wandering if this is normal.

She seems to continually have a cough and ive never been in my entire life ....

Help reassure me and if it's normal how long does it last

It's very normal unfortunately. It will last until you both become immune to whatever is going around.

But every few weeks 😪

Yep.

Really I'm beginning to think there's somehtjng really wrong with me medically

Very very normal!

What for the parent to catch everything too

Take some vitamin C and Zinc, it’ll boost your immune system.

Very normal. Make sure you eat well, and take a multivitamin to help boost your immune system. The first year at nursery can be difficult for this- but better you build immunity now than when they start school and are exposed again to all manner of extra germs! 🤧

Years a go when I worked in nursery, if we got fresh staff or children we would never see them (or at least well) for a good 6 months. Then you build your immunity and you're solid.

We had gastroenteritis in the baby room one year, so bad we shut for 3 days to deep clean and sterilise everything. That Friday one by one we cancelled our evening plans as we'd all been sick and went to bed expecting the worst. Next morning we were all fine.

Just gotta hold on and get through it, then you'll be solid.

Can be totally normal unfortunately. It does settle down eventually, but the run we had over like 2 months of noro, COVID, flu, chickenpox, colds, was rough as chickenpox was the only one that I didn't catch. It will settle down

This happened to DC1 and DH. We used up most of our annual leave covering DC1 sickness in first 18 months or so at nursery.

DC2 had a childminder, was sick much less often, could be coincidental but imagine much higher odds of illness in nurseries because there are so many DC and carers.

Agree it’s normal. I was at a talk recently with Joeli Brearley and she quoted a study that found that when children first start nursery they’re unwell for an average of 10 days in a month.

It’s brutal. It’s part of the reason why going part time worked better for me, the children have chance to recover before they’re next in nursery, we lost less money on unused nursery days and I didn’t have the stress of trying to work out what to do about work.

Agree is also normal for the parent to catch it, your body is probably quite low, you probably aren’t sleeping well. The worst was when I would pass the nursery germs around my whole office 🫠

It’s a really rubbish time but it passes.

Had to take my dd out of nursery in the end. At first I thought it was building her immune system then she got so ill and a consultant told me it was actually just overwhelming her immune system. The next virus triggered type 1 diabetes.

It’s awful but normal

Entirely normal. It got better at 5 but I still get everything DD gets and she is nearly 7. But she has improved compared to the toddler years. It’s such a parenting perk.

Before I had DD I was never off sick, now my sickness record at work is getting close to “average”.

It's normal but very disruptive. We've been constantly ill since December, apart from perhaps one glorious week where no one was snotty and/or coughing. And I do think it's been worse this year than last, hoping we'll all have incredible immune systems in the end!

First winter (last year) was brutal. I was ill so much and I ended up in hospital with pneumonia.

This winter has been loads better.

It will get better. Once the weather improves it will be less as they will be outside a lot more. Then by next winter hopefully they won't catch everything.
The one after that, I'm hoping will be better again still.

Currently going through this too, mine started in January. It’s been on and off colds, flu, all sorts every couple of weeks and I can’t seem to shift it. Unfortunately it is normal, I’ve had the same with my other child. Have to go vitamins etc and try be as healthy as possible and wash hands when getting home from nursery asap etc.

yes totally normal. get outside as much as you can! but there's research that younger kids will then get far less illnesses when they are older, so hold out for that.

As others have said, all very normal. You will both be through it soon and she will have a stonger immune system for it.
It is miserable though, so I hope you both feel better soon.

Thankyou everyone for your responses its just very strange how I seem to be ctahcing everything and ill every week and her dad is catching nothing..I'm beginning to think there's something wrong with me lol....and that it isn't normal..when I do get an illness I cant seem to shake the cough and its driving me mad

My husband didn't get nearly as ill as me. I think it is because when they are ill they want Mama and so you're the one to get sneezed, spotted, coughed, etc. on.

There’s someone asking the same question on a weekly basis on mumsnet- yes, nurseries are cesspits of viruses and bacteria. The constant illnesses are awful and traumatising for the kids and sometimes, like in your case, for the parents too. People will tell you it’s good for the immune system but unfortunately this is a myth and there really isn’t anything good about spending your whole babyhood/toddlerhoor feeling crappy. If you have any other childcare options at all, I would consider taking her out of nursery.

Exactly, catching the next virus before recovering from the previous one is so bad for their little bodies.

https://www.ucl.ac.uk/news/2026/mar/frequent-infections-nursery-help-toddlers-build-immune-systems

"The authors suggest a typical one-year-old starting nursery will experience around 12–15 respiratory infections, two gastrointestinal illnesses (diarrhoea and vomiting), and one or two rash-causing infections in the first year alone..."