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Original poster

How much communication should I expect from nursery?

90 replies

sleepslikeababy · 06/10/2022 20:18

My 2 yo started nursery at the end of July. He does 4 mornings a week. He loves it, runs in every morning, and always comes out beaming.

My issue is the lack of communication from the nursery. They have an app (Tapestry) but it hasn’t had any photos added to it since August. There is Parent Mail but the last email was for the Queens funeral (last minute closure). At handover a different worker each day will bring him out and say ‘he’s eaten loads, had a great day,’ or some variation of that. I hardly ever see who I think is his key worker Is this normal?

He’s our first so not sure what to expect. I feel a bit like I have no idea what he’s doing or how he’s doing for half the week.

To clarify, we have no concerns about behaviour or development, I just feel like there should be more information shared.

Am I wrong? What’s the communication like at other nurseries? Should I not worry because he seems happy?! I don’t want to make and issue where there isn’t one…

OP posts:
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Kite22 · 06/10/2022 22:04

Well, as a parent, I'd be quite happy.
You are getting a report, every day.
They are letting you know he is happy and there are no issues.
They are letting you know he's eaten well.
If there were anything to worry about you would probably get a slightly longer hand over, but there isn't.

Okay, in an ideal world, there ought to be a few more pictures on Tapestry, but really, are they needed ?
We all managed before it was available.

There is real shortages in staffing in Nurseries. In Sept there are usually lots of new starters and lots of children who need a bit more attention and support. I think if my child was happy going in, happy coming out, and staff were reporting he had had a good day, then I would be happy with that Smile

Kanaloa · 06/10/2022 22:05

That doesn’t sound great. I’ve worked in some nurseries where tapestry/famly/other app were updated daily and good handovers were given. I’ve worked in others where the norm was ‘erm yes he’s been a good boy’ and rushing off to try and sort a million other things. Generally I preferred the first type. Can you just ask ‘hi I’ve noticed I haven’t seen many updates of Jake, how is he getting on at nursery?’

Oatsamazing · 06/10/2022 22:11

My DD's nursery is similar, we usually get a weekly picture though. I always try and think of a couple of questions to ask at pick up so they expand on the 'great day' we would get otherwise. We used to get a list of the food served and the amount eaten on the app but that has stopped now she's moved to the over 2s room. We do get quarterly menus though so I could work out what was being served if I wanted to. We also get a monthly learning update and are supposed to have a zoom call with her key worker every 12 weeks but I've only had 2 in the last year.

CanIHaveAHolidayPlease · 06/10/2022 22:15

My baby does two full days per week at a private day nursery. There are a couple of pictures uploaded per week via tapestry, a monthly newsletter for both baby room and whole nursery and the key worker is quite happy to chat for as long as necessary at pick up and drop offs about sleep, food, nappy changes etc....

School nursery was different though. When my older children went, all I ever heard was "Yes he's had a good day, see you tomorrow."

Heyahun · 06/10/2022 22:20

i manage a nursery - it’s so hard for the staff to find time to sit down with the iPad and post - the days are insanely busy! We actually now have a member of staff who comes off the floor for half a day a week to the office and she does newsletters, updates, posts photos etc

the other staff do it if they can through the week

we do make sure to log what the child has eaten, toilet trips / nappy changes and sleep at a minimum though every day

Heyahun · 06/10/2022 22:23

if you think about it - wouldn’t you rather the children were having fun and being looked after rather than staff sitting there on iPads trying to create posts 🙈

Kanaloa · 06/10/2022 22:34

Heyahun · 06/10/2022 22:23

if you think about it - wouldn’t you rather the children were having fun and being looked after rather than staff sitting there on iPads trying to create posts 🙈

Really good nurseries will set aside time for staff to do this paperwork off the floor, not expect them to prioritise it over the children and their care. Tapestry/famly and similar apps aren’t just nice updates for the parents by the way - they have replaced the old folders and eyfs paper trackers, and are how we show ofsted that we are tracking the child’s development.

cafedesreves · 06/10/2022 22:40

Our nursery doesn't do daily photos but they are always super happy to chat about how DS is getting on. They said that it would take too long to update daily photos and it would detract from time taken with kids. They keep costs as low as possible so I understand this. I love them.

cafedesreves · 06/10/2022 22:41

@Kanaloa this would inevitably push costs up due to ratios being maintained

Heyahun · 06/10/2022 22:42

correct @Kanaloa our staff all get office time or a morning/day working from home regularly to do all the updates In peace :)

im talking about the photos etc being a nice bonus that we do when they can :)

Kanaloa · 06/10/2022 22:46

cafedesreves · 06/10/2022 22:41

@Kanaloa this would inevitably push costs up due to ratios being maintained

Yes, so? Really good nurseries would see that as a necessary cost. The alternative is cheating the ratios by having staff technically counted while they’re forced to try to complete paperwork etc in the room.

Kite22 · 07/10/2022 00:31

It isn't just costs at the moment though, it is finding staff to fill those posts.

It is also a bit simplistic to say "really good nurseries would see that as a necessary cost". The money still has to come from somewhere.
Most of the population aren't on big enough salaries to allow Nurseries to keep pushing costs up and up. There is a very difficult balancing act to be done, especially if you are serving an area where most of the children are funded children, and the hourly rate doesn't cover basic costs.

ShadowoftheFall · 07/10/2022 00:40

Gosh. I get a minimum 2-3 photos and posts about what my DC is doing every day including when has food and when/if sleeps, whether they’ve been outside. I thought that was a basic minimum.

toomuchlaundry · 07/10/2022 00:45

Haven’t the priorities for EYFS curriculum changed, so the amount recorded is reduced as more time should be spent working with children.

shinyshoes5566 · 07/10/2022 01:38

Do you really want the staff to spend time posting pictures on Tapestry when they should be looking after your child? There are only so many hours in the working day. I know which I'd prefer...

Original poster
sleepslikeababy · 07/10/2022 03:44

Thanks for all your replies. It’s helpful to see everyone’s perspectives!

Of course I’d rather the staff were engaging with the children than sitting on an iPad posting photos all day. The lack of photos was just an example of the perception of a general lack of communication on my behalf, and I wondered if this was normal.

As an example, last week he came out of nursery with a sticker from a music class - I had no idea he did music classes! i think I just need to get used to the fact he now has a separate little life to me!

I think in my naivety (as he’s my first) I expected I’d be much more aware of what he was doing all day! I guess this is just not the reality of sending your child to nursery!

OP posts:
JenniferBarkley · 07/10/2022 04:18

I have a two year old who goes full-time, her older sister went to the same nursery as well. They don't have an app which I'm fine with. From age two we get a verbal handover with how much they ate at each meal and how much they slept. They track nappy changes and toilet/potty usage too. We also get a quick outline of the day along the lines of walk in the morning, garden in the afternoon, painting, water play etc.

We would definitely know they were doing a music class! It sounds like your nursery doesn't have great communication but you could just ask what they got up to. If DC is going in and coming out happy it sounds like all is well.

FTMbg · 07/10/2022 04:29

We get a lot of photos each day plus the diary of nappies, food, sleep online, it's the most expensive nursery we looked at though. Handover is generally quite brief when there's no issues, we also get a monthly report. Still feel I don't know half of what she gets up to, just because so much goes on, no criticism of nursery. It'll be nice when she can tell me herself.

teezletangler · 07/10/2022 04:42

Why do people actually care about how many poos their child has done that day? Isn't it taking time away from the actual care of children to chart every poo, wee, nap, upload photos, do a monthly report etc etc? Honestly the staff must hate it. I live in Canada and all we ever got was a verbal handover- "she had a lovely day!" or whatever. If there was an issue (for example my daughter was napping too late at one point) then we would have an actual face to face discussion about it. Perhaps I'm missing something but when I hear about the reports my Sis and SIL get from their UK nurseries, I can't fathom why it's needed or what value it is adding.

CatSeany · 07/10/2022 04:52

We don't have anything electronic from our nursery, but we have a daily handover and paper form. It says what he ate for each meal and how much, whether he napped, nappy changes when he was in nappies and sometimes a detail about what they'd done that day. Every 6 months ish we get given a folder to look at which has some printed photos of him in that they've taken for their own developmental records. Has a big list of what he can do and written bits from carers saying how they've observed him etc. Perhaps your nursery is keeping these records in the background? I had no idea mine were until I got given it (we read it and then give it back for them to continue with).

Kanaloa · 07/10/2022 05:30

Kite22 · 07/10/2022 00:31

It isn't just costs at the moment though, it is finding staff to fill those posts.

It is also a bit simplistic to say "really good nurseries would see that as a necessary cost". The money still has to come from somewhere.
Most of the population aren't on big enough salaries to allow Nurseries to keep pushing costs up and up. There is a very difficult balancing act to be done, especially if you are serving an area where most of the children are funded children, and the hourly rate doesn't cover basic costs.

Well yes I do know that given that it’s my job - I’m aware of the issues around staffing in childcare. What I was saying is that communication with parents and updating of children’s records isn’t a nice plus, it’s a necessary job for a nursery. If they don’t have the staff to do it that means they can’t fulfill their job, not that the parent is just asking too much.

Kanaloa · 07/10/2022 05:33

Also the basic fact is many nurseries do manage that balancing act and are able to complete basic communication with parents - as a worker I seek those nurseries out, as a parent I would prioritise that too. Regardless of the state of childcare atm, it’s not impossible to find a nursery that manages to upload a photo weekly and let you know what your child has done in the day.

milawops · 07/10/2022 05:36

Everytime I pick my daughter up they tell me what she's been doing, exactly what she's eaten, how long she napped and how her mood has been. Once a month I get an email of her progress and photos.

Tillsforthrills · 07/10/2022 05:57

Kanaloa · 06/10/2022 22:05

That doesn’t sound great. I’ve worked in some nurseries where tapestry/famly/other app were updated daily and good handovers were given. I’ve worked in others where the norm was ‘erm yes he’s been a good boy’ and rushing off to try and sort a million other things. Generally I preferred the first type. Can you just ask ‘hi I’ve noticed I haven’t seen many updates of Jake, how is he getting on at nursery?’

I prefer the 2nd type.

If my child is happy, we’ll fed and looked after at that age I don’t need long handovers just the basics.

Time taking the perfect pictures and typing out updates would depend on how many staff are available to do that, personally I’d take direct interaction with my children over that any day.

Tillsforthrills · 07/10/2022 06:02

Kanaloa · 07/10/2022 05:30

Well yes I do know that given that it’s my job - I’m aware of the issues around staffing in childcare. What I was saying is that communication with parents and updating of children’s records isn’t a nice plus, it’s a necessary job for a nursery. If they don’t have the staff to do it that means they can’t fulfill their job, not that the parent is just asking too much.

Show quote history

My CM said changes to the EYFS means she will be graded by Ofsted on her knowledge of my child and won’t need to show learning paperwork, journals etc unless she wants to but that the inspector won’t ask to see it.

So perhaps this shift in what inspectors are looking for means less paperwork is needed.