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Nurseries

Find nursery advice from other Mumsnetters on our Nursery forum. For more guidance on early years development, sign up for Mumsnet Ages & Stages emails.

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Original poster

Nursery 5 days a week?

41 replies

Peridotty · 07/07/2021 03:15

I have just started our 13 month old DD at a nursery 5 days a week 9.30-4.30. Is this a lot? It’s a very good nursery and they actually speak another language so she can learn two languages. I am studying full time and my husband wfh full time. It’s not a cheap nursery- they charge £25,000 a year in fees.

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Willwebebuyingnumber11 · 07/07/2021 03:27

Yes, that’s a lot for a 1 year old. The cost is irrelevant. At the moment, so is the fact they do 2 languages when she’s still only 13 months. If you have no other choice then don’t dwell on it. I’m sure she will enjoy it.

Original poster

Peridotty · 07/07/2021 03:32

Other choices would be a nanny but then we live in a one bed flat and husband wfh so no space for them really. No family nearby either.
They have part time slots but only 2 per class. Most kids are in there 8.30-5.30 so I thought that limiting it to 9.30-4.30 was already better than that.

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Original poster

Peridotty · 07/07/2021 03:32

I want her to be bilingual which is why we started her young.

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Original poster

Peridotty · 07/07/2021 03:33

What are the downsides of going 35 hours a week to nursery?

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XioXio · 07/07/2021 03:47

If you want her to be bilingual you can speak to her in the 2 languages at home.

Does she need to be in full time? Is your study flexible at all?

THATbasicSNOWFLAKE · 07/07/2021 03:50

Is she attending all year around or term time only as your a student?

Original poster

Peridotty · 07/07/2021 05:11

She’s attending full time year round. My course is full time year round with only public days off. I actually only go in 3.5 days a week but I will be studying at home on the days I don’t have uni.

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Original poster

Peridotty · 07/07/2021 05:12

I can’t speak the other language that they teach her (Mandarin).

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PrincessesRUs · 07/07/2021 06:11

Languages aside - my husband and I work full time (though I am term time only) my children had to be in nursery full time 8.30-4.30 so that we can pay the bills. The nursery is wonderful. Sometimes you have to do it and don't have the luxury of part time/one parent at home. Don't feel guilty!

PrincessesRUs · 07/07/2021 06:13

Are you in a country where she will carry on with mandarin post nursery? If not it's pointless as you won't be able to speak with her and she'll forget it all come reception!!

Orchidflower1 · 07/07/2021 06:17

Aside from the separation thing- Can you comfortably afford it as a viable solution for the next 18m/ 2y?

MindyStClaire · 07/07/2021 06:23

Full-time nursery is very normal for many young children whose parents work. Both of mine have done 8:30-5:00 or so from ten months and I have no concerns.

DD2 has only been there a couple of months, but DD1 is 3 now and it's been brilliant for her. Both love it, DD2 starts getting excited as we head out to the car each day, it's very cute.

One of the advantages of full-time is that the staff know them well - if I'm told at pickup that one of them has been in funny form I know to take it seriously. It's also nice from an organisational point of view to be doing the same thing every morning and evening!

Who knows if it's better or worse for them than a nanny or a SAHP but there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. The most important thing about a nursery is that you can trust them and your DC are happy there.

(This may well turn into a SAHP Vs WOHP thread, so hard hat on.)

ChocOrange1 · 07/07/2021 06:26

Yes, it is a lot for such a young baby.

But if you need the childcare and can afford it, that's your choice.

Personally I would be trying to have a half day or day when she wasn't at nursery, and complete my uni work in the evening/on a weekend.

Have you actually started the uni course? Often they say ots full time "you'll be working all the time even on the days you're not in lectures" but it actually isn't. Depends on the university and the course, but when I was "studying full time" I did 20 hours a week of lectures and about 3 hours a week of other study.

burritofan · 07/07/2021 06:27

FT nursery is perfectly normal for lots and lots of kids. In some ways they settle better because they’re not chopping and changing. Good idea on the shorter days.

I’ve just changed my hours to take DD down to four days, partly because she was knackered by Fridays and I felt she needed a day at home, partly because I missed her. Is compressing your studies and your DH compressing his hours so the three of you can have a three-day weekend a possibility?

Those fees are eye-watering! Think DD was £16.5k for her first year all told.

ChocOrange1 · 07/07/2021 06:28

@Peridotty

I can’t speak the other language that they teach her (Mandarin).

What is your plan for maintaining her Mandarin studies after she leaves nursery, if she isn't regularly exposed to it at home or somewhere else she will forget it.

Thisusedtobeaniceneighbourhood · 07/07/2021 06:37

You’re getting a rough ride on here OP. Plenty of babies do go to nursery full time from very young (and more like 8-6 for some children I know). Culturally speaking, in the U.K. at least, working part time with 3-4 days a week seems to be the preferred option … but some people need full time childcare and that’s ok.

MindyStClaire · 07/07/2021 06:52

Culturally speaking, in the U.K. at least, working part time with 3-4 days a week seems to be the preferred option...

For women. Fathers are never chastised for working full-time and using childcare.

Thisusedtobeaniceneighbourhood · 07/07/2021 07:28

@MindyStClaire I’m not chastising anyone. I’m saying that many women choose to do a shorter week, or a condensed pattern. But tbf, I know a few fathers who do this too. I am also saying that there is nothing wrong with full time nursery if that’s what is right for the family and that PP are giving @Peridotty a hard time.

GiantToadstool · 07/07/2021 07:38

I think full time when you absolutely have to makes sense and is fine.

But if you can avoid doing that I would.

Can you have a day at home with the baby and do a study day at the weekend for example? Or study some evening hours? Can partner move a day or condense hours?

The dual language is irrelevant really.

sweetheartyparty · 07/07/2021 07:56

My daughter went 4 days a week from 1 year old. She was very happy and had lovely bonds with the staff. Now she is 4 years old and very bright and confident and getting ready to go to school. I have no concerns about her settling in and making friends at her new school. I'm sure nursery benefited her enormously and I have no regrets

NakedAttraction · 07/07/2021 08:06

The vast majority of parents who work FT put their children in nursery FT from a young age and they are perfectly fine.

DiamondBright · 07/07/2021 11:02

Full time nursery is fine, they spend the day playing, eating and sleeping same as they would at home.

mindutopia · 07/07/2021 11:05

I think it's perfectly fine to be in nursery 5 days a week at that age. Realistically, people have to work. I was in childcare full time from 3 months as that's when my mum went back to work. In the US, most people go back 6 weeks - 3 months pp.

But the fees seem eye-wateringly high for nursery. I wouldn't be interested in the bilingual bit, unless you plan to move to China and she will go to school there post-nursery. She really won't remember it unless you are also fluent and speaking it to her at home. But £25,000 a year is £2,083 a month!

By contrast, our youngest is in nursery 4 days (I used to work compressed hours FT, though since COVID work .8 FTE so it's only 4 normal days). But even if he was in 5 days, which he sometimes is, it would still only be about £1000 a month for 9-5 and at a very good private nursery. There is nothing magical anyone could provide that would justify spending twice that on the same hours.

Joanie1972 · 07/07/2021 11:10

I would not do this unless I absolutely had to and ideally not until at least age 3. Little children need a consistent care-giver they can bond with. This could be a mother, father, granny or childminder. In most nurseries they will be cared for by several staff and it may not always be the same people.

herewegoohherewego · 07/07/2021 11:12

It's on the upper end of time spent in nursery but she's doing shorter days than some children to be fair. It's very normal for plenty of children.

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