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Nurseries

Find nursery advice from other Mumsnetters on our Nursery forum. For more guidance on early years development, sign up for Mumsnet Ages & Stages emails.

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Original poster

Horrible nursery manager - WWYD?

56 replies

Lbabyx · 11/04/2013 09:31

Hi,

I dropped my daughter off at nursery this morning (only his third time) and needed to drop off some calpol prescribed by the doctor for her cough and runny nose. It was labelled and prescribed within the last 7 days as required. However, the nursery manager (who I have been warned about in the past), refused to believe that my daughtee didn't have a temperature and said the doctor wouldn't have prescribed calpol without a temp. We doesn't have a temp and hasn't ever had one in the 5 months she's been alive! The nursery manager made me out to be a liar and made me feel like I was convincing her to give my daughter poison!!

I was so upset driving home, tempted to put my daughter in a different nursery but she's happy there?

What would you do?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

ReetPetit · 13/04/2013 10:43

all nurseries have different rules lottieandmia - same as childminders. This should all have been checked out before starting child there.

Imo, you shouldn't be moving a 5 month old child around at the slightest crossed word from someone. Sometimes you just have to deal with things and move on from them, not flounce off taking poor child in tow - who is apparently happy there and just settling!!

Obviously if the op is very unhappy with attitudes there/care of child etc then she should go elsewhere but I think she will find that most childcare providers have similiar policies.

Goodkingwalkingslass · 13/04/2013 10:57

I'm actually amazed that because parents are off work, people believe their child shouldn't enjoy nursery!?

She's 5 months old! She's got a painful cough and would enjoy being with you not in the care of strangers I'm sure.

ReetPetit · 13/04/2013 11:14

agree with Goodking!!

Theyoniwayisnorthwards · 13/04/2013 11:23

A 5 month old is too young to 'enjoy' nursery.

lottieandmia · 13/04/2013 13:16

It's not for any of you to judge whether the 5 month old should be at nursery - I would think her mother knows better than anyone on here how well she is.

And yes, all nurseries do have different rules. Which is why it's important to find one where you get on with the manager at the very least and where you are treated with respect just like anywhere you pay for a service.

In any case I think the OP has gone and I think it was out of order that people on this thread were judging her parenting. But then, on MN some people always like to have a go at the OP as a sport.

Sirzy · 13/04/2013 14:10

The problem is lottie too many parents do send their child to nursery when they should be at home and that is how illnesses spread

poozlepants · 13/04/2013 15:22

Get a new nursery. Your daughter is only very little and she won't know the difference. You however will have to put up with a rude nursery manager for the next 4 years.

Original poster

Lbabyx · 13/04/2013 23:59

Had nursery felt my child was unfit for being there they would have called me to collect her. I, as her mother, decided that she was fit for nursery and not uncomfortable, upset or poorly - simply had had a cough and was following doctors suggestions. Many people have said, working in a school or in a nursery, that parents send their child in when sick. In my experience, most parents keep children off for very minor reasons, fr example a Tummy ache or cough.

Now, I don't know about other babies but my child enjoys being around people, and being stimulated by toys. Hence why I felt nursery would be good for my child and why I said she ENJOYS it. Because YES she does.

I am not disagreeing with the nursery managers policies and I understand, as in the school I work in, that these must be upheld in order to protect all involved. However, as I have explained, she was extremely rude.

I have since spoken to the manager and he has apologised profusely and admitted that she was out of order. I also asked her if she agreed that my child was for for nursery and she said yes, to only keep her off for temperature or anything viral.

So, thank you to those who answered my question. And to those who didn't - but decided to make me feel like an unfit mother - I don't really know why you felt you had to judge me when I was already upset about leaving my child at nursery so young (needs/must) and after I was spoken to so rudely - I hope nobody on mum's net makes you feel that way in the future. I am going to disable my account and simply ask family and friends in the future.

OP posts:

insancerre · 14/04/2013 11:41

What a fuss about nothing.
So everyone who disagrees with the op is in the wrong.

ReetPetit · 14/04/2013 13:10

Flounce away op - you are simply throwing your toys out your pram because others have disagreed with you.

I stand by what i said. I feel the manager was right to question you and i feel you should maybe look for a new GP, rather than a new nursery

Wishiwasanheiress · 14/04/2013 13:13

Our nursery is fine with calpol. I'm rather surprised others aren't. The parent signs a form for it be given and says which time.

Calpol is available off NHS. As is teething gel. Honestly. Amazed me too but it's definately done, have seen prescriptions for it!

lottieandmia · 14/04/2013 13:42

Our nursery will give antibiotics too, and this is a nursery that is very strict about safety and is rated outstanding by ofsted.

ReetPetit · 14/04/2013 14:13

Most nurseries will give antibiotics after the first 48 hours, same as childminDer.
Calpol/pain relief is completely different.

lottieandmia · 14/04/2013 21:07

Why is it different? Our nursery doesn't seem to have a problem with Calpol. Obviously if the child has a fever they are sent home immediately.

OpheliasWeepingWillow · 14/04/2013 21:16

Bloody hell. It's CALPOL not morphine.

*backs away from thread

DuelingFanjo · 14/04/2013 21:23

I think the OP is 'throwing her toys out of thepram' because so many of you made very transparent digs about how she parents and about putting a young child into nursery care when she was actually asking you something completely different.

As someone already said, calpol is more than just something to lower a temperature, isn't it?

I am sure there are some parents who decide they have to work when their children are under the weather but most parents are not try to sneak their sick children into the nursery when ill.

LynetteScavo · 14/04/2013 21:25

Settling a child into nursery while you are off work is the perfect time....so I totally get why the OP would send her DC.

Calpol for cough and runny nose? Calpol reduces fever and relieves pain. So I can see why the manager might question the if a baby was well enough for nursery. However she should not be rude, and I would be looking for a different setting, as I wouldn't want to be dealing with such a person for the next 4.5 years.

Goodkingwalkingslass · 14/04/2013 22:33

We didn't make digs about how she parents or about putting a young child into nursery care, none of our business IMO. I simply pointed out a poorly baby would enjoy time with mum more so than with strangers.

Goodkingwalkingslass · 14/04/2013 22:34

ReetPetit · 14/04/2013 22:40

lottieandmia = it is different. Antibiotics are prescribed to treat bacterical infections. A child can have a bacterial infection, which after 48 hours, nursery staff/childminder can carry on giving doses of antibiotics. Any reaction would normally happen in the first 48 hours when child is being cared for at home by parent and after the first 48 hours the hope is that the child is no longer infectious (assuming antibiotics were given for something infectious in first place...)

Calpol is a temperature reducer and a pain reliever. A child who is ill enough to require pain relief whilst in childcare should not be there! Also, how does the childcarer know what the calpol was origanally prescribed for? It could have been prescribed for high temp and parent then presents the next day with child, giving a completely different reason.

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 14/04/2013 22:49

It's your DD's third time at nursery and you've been warned about the manager before?

The manager made you feel like Calpol = poison?

What exactly did the manager say?

LynetteScavo · 14/04/2013 23:02

Generally GP's don't prescribe Calpol they tell you to go and buy it yourself IME.

I'm guessing you asked for a prescription, so your DD would be given Calpol while at nursery.

DuelingFanjo · 15/04/2013 10:18

is that the royal we?

ReetPetit · 15/04/2013 14:00

drhw · 17/04/2013 22:26

I think done nurseries can be very difficult about calpol being given. It took my dd to have a febrile convulsion at nursery for them to let her have a bottle there just in case.

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