Why is everyone so obsessed with cats?

[BachAndByte]

Just musing on this, as I’ve read a lot of posts on here saying about cats.

I’m not an animal fan, really, but if forced to choose I’d go for dogs.

But it is so, so common for the people I know with ASD to be obsessed with cats. And that’s coming through on here too.

I just find them scary because they’re so unpredictable and apparently you can’t train them to stay away from things, which I would hate.

Am I doing autism wrong (again!)? What is it about cats that fascinates rather than scares people?

I too am not a cat fan for the same reasons as you. I'm a dog and other animals fan! But not cats.

For me, all animals are good because they're non-judgemental. I can learn their 'rules' much more easily than learning human rules. I find it easier to accept affection from my cats than from humans, and cats understand the concept of needing their own space too.

I think everyone has different things they find scary, and it's certainly not wrong not to be able to tolerate cats - I can see what you mean about them not staying away from things. That is something you have to learn to live with, but if you are not drawn to cats you'd have no reason to want to put up with it.

ASD here, really dislike cats as a pet species.

I am of course kind to individual animals I come across that happen to be cats, and can be fond of individual pet cats that I know, while disliking many of the things that they do (but not blaming them for it, obviously — if you're a cat, you can't help that). Even house- and cat-sat for several months during the height of Covid lockdowns due to family need, and the cats still remembered me fondly when I went to visit a year later, so obviously I looked after them adequately, but they're not my kind of pet.

I dislike them because:

• I'm mildly allergic to them.
• They smell terrible and make anywhere they live smell terrible.
• They like to thrust their anuses in your face and lie down on you.
• They cover every surface in the house in a thin layer of stickiness and hair, and I hate cleaning. They can't be kept off surfaces so unless you're constantly cleaning, you're likely ingesting non-zero quantities of cat shit. You never feel clean in a cat house.
• They come up to you and fawn on you when you're trying to do things — I can't properly coordinate my movements if a person or animal is touching my body, and they get in your way all the time.
• They're emotionally needy but difficult to read and unpredictable in the way they react, sometimes digging claws or teeth into you for no apparent reason.
• They damage everything by scratching it, staining it with bodily fluids, or chewing.
• It's unfair to keep them indoors, but if you let them out, your well-fed non-native pet predator will unnecessarily kill local wildlife and cause a nuisance to other local people with their waste products.
• They're not particularly interactive as pets and not very social — most of them don't particularly like being around most people, other cats, etc.
• As obligate carnivores, pet cats are a high carbon footprint pet species (though lower than dogs, being smaller). You can switch to a vegan diet to help the planet but your cat can't.
• Changing the litter tray makes me feel really sick — I just hate having a tray of shit in the house, and even with maximum arrangements to avoid smell (covered tray, crystal litter, fancy mechanised disposal unit) the room stinks of it. The alternative I suppose is letting them out and inflicting the noxious shit on neighbours who just want to enjoy their gardens, or having your own garden full of it.
• Did I mention, allergic.

I know a lot of people with and without ASD do like pet cats, though. Just not my thing.

They like to thrust their anuses in your face and lie down on you
🤣

I love my two indoor cats. They have to be indoors as they are FIV+. They are the most affectionate and loving cats you've ever met - I seriously hate it when people say cats are aloof and don't interact with you because that depends on the cat. I've had cats my whole life and a good 90% of them were incredibly affectionate. Some won't sit on your lap, granted, but they all have character and their own individual personalities. They're the funniest, most special little beings.

Yes they do scratch the furniture but that doesn't bother me. I like the fact they're not in your face and noisy like dogs are (I do like dogs), and that you don't have to walk them.

I think dogs smell more than cats too.

So that's my two cents.

@Nortd

They like to thrust their anuses in your face and lie down on you 🤣

Apparently it means they like you 😒

And I don't find them scary because I grew up with cats, and the odd swipe or nip doesn't bother me.

Cats always bloody adore me. I'm like the cat whisperer.

My theory is that it's because my glasses make my eyes look tiny, and I send out "piss off and leave me alone, I prefer my face when it's not inflated with snot" vibes, which is basically psychological catnip.

I can't count the number of times people have expressed surprise at how comfortable their cat is around me, because usually they're scared of strangers or don't like them. I think it may also have to do with me smelling more of basic human, as I don't like fragrance on my clothes or body. Twenty minutes in someone's house and their "hates strangers" cat is usually draped somewhere on me with its arse floating in my face 😑

I can’t remember where I read this but apparently cats hate eye contact, so if you don’t make eye contact with them then they absolutely love you.

I wonder if that helps in terms of the cat / autism connection?

Glad I’m not the only person not to “get” cats, though. I was starting to feel a bit weird

They walk up to me in the street! Random bloody cats. Never anyone else I'm with, always me. Winding round my legs.

They hate being stared at, but will show affection by exchanging a 'slow blink' - if you want a cat to like you, slowly close and open your eyes several times, and if you're lucky the cat will do it back to you.

I like rats and guinea pigs. Neither species gives a shit either way about eye contact. With rats, it's all about whether you're trustworthy and fun to be around. Guinea pigs, basically the relationship hinges on whether you bring them dandelion leaves or not. Eye contact isn't a factor.

@BoardLikeAMirror

They hate being stared at, but will show affection by exchanging a 'slow blink' - if you want a cat to like you, slowly close and open your eyes several times, and if you're lucky the cat will do it back to you.

They're always doing that to me.

There must be something about you they like, ClumpingBamboo. It may well be what you said about not wearing fragrance - they tend to dislike artificial smells of all kinds.

I LOVE cats!!
I have 5 and we did have 6 but one went missing.
Yes they are hairy and yes they scratch things but honestly, my cats love me back.
One of them won't leave my side and will cuddle up to me all day if I let them. 4 of them even 'groom' the kids 🤣 who love having a cat wash.
They all let me hold them like a baby and purr when I do.
My house probably stinks but I really don't care as I don't allow visitors.

One just got on my knee and lay down on my chest, squinted her eyes at me and touched me slowly on the face with her paw 🐾
Melts my heart

@ofwarren

One just got on my knee and lay down on my chest, squinted her eyes at me and touched me slowly on the face with her paw 🐾 Melts my heart

That's very sweet :)

@BoardLikeAMirror

There must be something about you they like, ClumpingBamboo. It may well be what you said about not wearing fragrance - they tend to dislike artificial smells of all kinds.

Also, I'm nice to them if they ask (I'm not a monster — if a cat comes up to me wanting fussing, I fuss the cat) but leave them alone if they don't.

From the cat's perspective, I can entirely understand wanting nothing to do with a human who rushes up to them wide-eyed and baring their teeth, making loud noises and stretching a hand towards them. Even if the person thinks they're smiling, greeting the kitty and offering a fuss.

I just don't like pets/ animals at all. I hate that NTs judge me for this. I hate anyone/ anything touching me.

I struggle enough looking after myself that I'd neglect any animal I got. I don't remember to feed myself let alone an animal.

@felulageller

I just don't like pets/ animals at all. I hate that NTs judge me for this. I hate anyone/ anything touching me.

I struggle enough looking after myself that I'd neglect any animal I got. I don't remember to feed myself let alone an animal.

It's a totally valid thing to feel. I'm sorry that NTs have tried to make you feel bad about it

I'm one of those who is obsessed with cats. I find their body language really readable and relatable, I love that they're loving but not needy, I find their unashamed cuntiness endlessly amusing. I could never be without cats now, they are an essential part of my daily coping strategy.

Really shit for anyone to judge you for not liking cats though @felulageller, what is the logic there?! It's not a choice, is it, how you feel about an animal. I feel absolutely zilch for dogs, personally. I just see shit and hair and slobber. I'm not horrible to them, I just don't like them. I have been judged for it too.

Can I just say how nice it is to be able to have a civilised and non-defensive discussion!

I don’t think I can read body language with many animals. Dogs a bit, at least to tell if they’re friendly or not, but not otherwise.

I would like to have a guinea pig or rabbit but for some reason they both smell really bad to me. But they are very cute.

Rabbits and guinea pigs do have a smell, sort of wood chippings and wee kind of aroma.
I don't get defensive if others don't like cats or other animals. As long as you aren't hurting them it's a perfectly normal point of view.