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October is ADHD Awareness Month

87 replies

BertieBotts · 13/10/2015 21:38

So I thought I'd make a little landing pad for any MNers who suspect themselves or are curious about ADHD. We also have a lovely Neurodiversity support thread, which tends to run much better long term (ADHDers tending to not be fantastic at remembering to post on such a thread Blush)

If you don't like reading long threads, there is a brilliant video here which (attempts to) explain in one minute what adult ADHD looks like, because it's so different from the stereotypes that we often have in mind about ADHD. vimeo.com/141104970. You can skip the rest of my OP Wink

For those who prefer reading I'll try to explain some of the main symptoms and/or signs and how it differs. As the guy in the video says, you don't need to have all of the signs to have ADHD, and nobody does.

There are thought to be three main areas where ADHD (ADD is an older name but they are the same thing) affects people: Impulsivity, Inattention and Hyperactivity.

Impulsivity (caused by ADHD) in adults often looks like this:

  • Difficulty managing money
  • Often interrupting or interjecting into conversations inappropriately
  • Emotional disregulation - being quicker to anger, upset, or excite than other people generally.
  • History of unsuitable relationships or trouble holding down a relationship
  • Jumping around in conversation leaving others confused
  • Lots of half finished projects or tasks - feeling like you're always starting things but never accomplish much.
  • History of many different jobs, education directions or hobbies.
  • A general dislike or disdain for the idea of routines and schedules
  • And of course the obvious - being generally impulsive, easily distracted and starting lots of activities at the last minute. (But this is not the only or a necessary sign)

Inattention caused by ADHD in adults looks like:

  • Time blindness - always being late for things and/or losing track of time.
  • Disorganisation, messiness, general sense of chaos despite attempts to organise.
  • Finding it difficult to stick to plans or goals and not really knowing why
  • Reporting less success than other people using organisational aids such as calendars, to-do lists, reminders and diaries.
  • Forgetfulness - sometimes forgetting entire conversations, forgetting an important task repeatedly or forgetting things which you do regularly.
  • Contrary to (but coexistent with) the impulsive point, a tendency to do nothing and/or procrastinate when you don't have a set timetable or schedule.
  • Chronic procrastination - to the point of missing or underperforming at things which are important to you
  • Difficulty focusing, especially if a task is repetitive or long, but with a tendency to focus for long times at the expense of all else sometimes.
  • Less care taken while driving leading to minor accidents or detours.
  • Difficulty keeping in touch with friends or in the inner circle of friendship groups, especially as you age and lose regular connections such as school, university or work.

Hyperactivity in ADHD adults is the one which looks LEAST like expectations. It's things like:

  • Talking a LOT and/or very fast
  • Chatterbox brain - having 100 thoughts whirling around at once all the time
  • Always needing to be "busy"
  • Fidgeting and fiddling - finger tapping, foot tapping, swinging legs in a chair, chewing things, smoking, fiddling with hair, picking spots/scabs
  • Difficulty falling asleep at night
  • Addictive behaviour or history of - abuse of drugs or alcohol, smoking, caffeine addiction/dependency, risky sexual behaviour, internet/video game addiction, shopping or gambling addiction, exercise addiction, etc etc.
  • Unexpected results from mild stimulants and depressants - usually swapped. Medicine with a side effect of drowsiness wakes you up and stimulants have little effect or make you feel productive and/or sleepy. (Sometimes causes the addictive behaviour as an attempt to self medicate)

And some general correlations:

  • Having dyslexia or another related disorder (ADHD is often comorbid with other disorders, and dyslexia is the most likely to have been diagnosed in the UK if you were at school in the 80s-00s)
  • Sensory seeking or avoidant behaviour - disliking textures of certain clothes or foods, finding loud noise or bright light difficult.
  • Teenage pregnancy (and by association, being born to a mother who experienced this even if you weren't that baby from that pregnancy.)
  • Having a close relative, including a child, who also displays signs or symptoms of ADHD.
  • Having tried countless self help books but none have been in the slightest bit effective.

As a child:

  • You might have been described as a "daydreamer" or were often being told off for chatting when you shouldn't have been.
  • You tended to produce work - especially homework and coursework - which was much lower than the standard expected or the level you worked at in class, and teachers often expressed a sense that you "weren't trying hard enough".

Adults (especially women, and some girls) do NOT tend to:

  • Get up and walk out of meetings when you are expected to be still
  • Have a history of violent behaviour
  • Run around acting without any inhibition at all
  • Do something to the extreme or not at all

These are ADHD behaviours but more often seen in boys and men.

Well, this ended up really long Blush Anyway, jump in! Don't be shy! :)

OP posts:
lborgia · 27/10/2015 04:49

Well we had a family crisis throughout the a level exams and so I got the benefit of the doubt. I also purely blagged my way onto a new course - although now it's a very common part of science teaching it was new as a separate course. Huge number of hours in lectures and land which I loved - essays etc were constant deadline crashing/missing mess. I was LUCKY that I was actually ill in the last 2 years and therefore given a huge amount of leeway. Physical illness still required medical certificates etc but in hindsight (right at this moment) I wouldn't have even managed a 2:2 without being ill. Hmm

I am currently a terrible sahm, am hoping medicine will lead to a whole new world (preferably before Christmas).

lborgia · 27/10/2015 04:54

*lab work, not land

2LittleMonkeysJumpingOnMyHead · 27/10/2015 06:32

Hello, I've been lurking since yesterday. I did ok at college / uni but mostly because I remember well. I did a degree that didn't need a dissertation. I then quit my MSc as couldn't face the project...
I also teach (adults) and also feel I could show up and teach a reasonable lesson and struggle with the prep... I procrastinate like mad.

BertieBotts · 27/10/2015 07:31

Hi 2Little :)

I really struggled with being a SAHM. I've found motherhood really, crushingly hard actually, I don't know if it's my age or the brain stuff or because I'm not organised so I'm always swimming in a pile of stuff.

Occasionally I make to do lists in order to get everything out of my brain onto paper and it turns out that the amount of tasks I'm holding in my head thinking "I must do that" covers at least a side and a half of A4. When I show it to anybody they just look at me like I'm crazy, like they're saying why haven't you prioritised these, or done them (some will be years old, others will take seconds). Because I can't. I can't prioritise effectively. I can't keep track of everything because there is too much.

Barkley says something like 96% of people with ADHD don't make it through university. I think that includes those who never start because their general education level is low or they don't get on well at school. But it is both damning and reassuring - when I realise the odds were stacked like that, I don't blame myself as much.

I also can't drive and am really nervous to learn because I'm worried I won't be able to pay attention sufficiently to the road.

OP posts:
2LittleMonkeysJumpingOnMyHead · 27/10/2015 07:36

I think i drive ok. I do, however, find it almost impossible to focus on one task. I'm constantly multitasking.
I'm tempted to read a book, but worried that might just help me to identify with a potential diagnosis more...

lborgia · 27/10/2015 08:17

Hi 2M Grin your housework post freaked me out - so similar.

Found learning to drive quite hard, it took a long time for it to become second nature. . But I was already 30 so it may be an age thing too. I've just realised getting an automatic car is what made the difference. Huge. My dad was a really hard driver - so impatient, constantly changing gear, yelling at people, pretty scary actually. I'm a pretty impatient driver but I do have very fast reaction times Hmm

I certainly wouldn't let it stop you.

I was offered the choice of taking a year off uni to recover but I stayed as I knew I'd never go back otherwise. I'm desperate to do a masters but at the moment there's no way I can envisage it.

Bertie your sentence about motherhood is exactly how I feel. It's supposed to be the easiest/best/most natural job in the world and it's crushingly hard.

This is all pretty weird. Very weird.

BertieBotts · 27/10/2015 08:43

Monkeys was I ever on a parenting thread with you, a long running one?

Take your own time on reading/researching. I kept coming back and forth to it. If you want to research with no financial investment there are some great youtube talks. I have to do something else while I listen, though, or I lose track totally. And it can't be anything else to do with language - reading, typing, etc, it has to be something non verbal or it cuts out that channel. But it seems as though my brain, my "internal voice" is also tuned into the language track so if I just try and listen to something without occupying my hands or eyes my brain takes over and I wander off, mentally, down a totally different path.

DS has just turned seven and is markedly easier but I still find really obvious (to DH) things hard. Like it just occurred to me this morning that DH is right we need to leave the house at 7.30 because to me "leaving the house" is getting shoes, coat, bag on and then leaving, because I assume it will take less than a minute. I've timed DS today and yesterday and it takes him 25 minutes. Most of this is pointless rambling off on an unrelated subject (they say it runs in families, huh? :o) or bitching at me about his bag which is too heavy (it's too large to be considered hand luggage on Ryanair, so he has a point, but that's how it is here.) or taking his coat and jumper on and off approximately 982 times so that he can align the sleeves properly. It literally didn't occur to me before that that is just how long it takes him.

OP posts:
2LittleMonkeysJumpingOnMyHead · 27/10/2015 09:18

I'm not sure if I have met you on here before, Bertie. I've been on a few long running threads and recently NCed...

BertieBotts · 27/10/2015 09:25

I'm not good at keeping up with name changes which is why I never NC Grin Don't worry. It was probably a different poster with a monkey-related name :)

OP posts:
2LittleMonkeysJumpingOnMyHead · 27/10/2015 15:53

It won't be me then, I have only just acquired a monkey related name :)

OVienna · 28/10/2015 07:44

Sorry to post and run but I need to vine back to this...

2LittleMonkeysJumpingOnMyHead · 28/10/2015 10:27

I'm procrastinating, as should be working while DC are at nursery, so have completed this quiz:
www.additudemag.com/quiz/7/results.html
I get either 9-11/15 yes depending which way I go on my maybes. I've printed the results to show the dr next time I go for my check up.

Anyone else had a look at the quiz?

lborgia · 28/10/2015 11:00

Ooh, I'll go and have a look at that. . Not that I'm in any way supporting your procrastination Hmm

BertieBotts · 28/10/2015 11:17

I get 13/15 on that quiz. It sounds familiar... I think I might have done it before!

Quizzes like this are of course not an accurate measure of anything but they ARE a very useful blunt tool to open up discussion e.g. with GP. Let us know how you get on. My friend in the UK who asked her GP about it got a very dismissive response, which is not how it's supposed to go - I don't know how typical it is. If you get a dismissive response, try contacting these guys: www.lanc.org.uk/about-us-adhd-asd-assessment/our-history/

OP posts:
lborgia · 28/10/2015 11:17

Not sure whether to laugh or cry. "You have scored 100%. You have scored 15 out of 15. You may wish to print this off and take it to a doctor". No shit sherlock.

I'm not sure there's any hope frankly. I suspect even Ritalin can't save this one.

I'm going to bed - DH isn't even here and I still can't get ot bed on time. House looks as if a tornado has hit it, and I'm supposed to have people over tomorrow.

Will come back when I've found perspective!

lborgia · 28/10/2015 11:19

Hello Bertie - just saw you. There will be no problem with talking to the HCP - I'm booked in to see a psychiatrist specialising in Adult ADHD in a couple of weeks. No persuading needed when there's money being paid. bitter, but glad I have the option

PolterGoose · 28/10/2015 11:43

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BertieBotts · 28/10/2015 12:31

Oh brilliant Iborgia :) That's good to know!

My two I didn't click were borderline - or you know when you think you know what they're trying to ask but the specific example they give didn't apply to you? And it's hard not to be influenced, as well - because I've read about ADHD and thought "Yes! I do that!" then I'm more likely to notice that pattern and then when a question comes up about that pattern, I'll say "Yes yes, that's totally me" when it might just have been 10% me - if that makes any sense?

This might be interesting, Polter: www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/6594.html

OP posts:
lborgia · 28/10/2015 12:42

Polter Hello, and can I be thick and ask what AS stands for? Cheers Smile

Bertie, the thing is, I'm not saying yes because it's adhd, I'm answering yes to everything thinking "this is ridiculous, isn't this just how everyone in the whole world feels/behaves? " Grin I guess not!

PolterGoose · 28/10/2015 13:50

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lborgia · 28/10/2015 20:49

Thanks Polter, and yes, I couldn't even look at the website on my mobile, it couldn't cope!

BertieBotts · 29/10/2015 13:55

Oh the layout is AWFUL. Isn't it? I find it hard going! It's about ten years out of date and optimised for ancient screen resolutions, and not at all for mobiles. Their slideshow articles are the worst.

But they do have some really astute stuff. So it's sometimes worth it. I have actually emailed them about the layout but they never replied.

OP posts:
PolterGoose · 29/10/2015 15:03

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BertieBotts · 29/10/2015 17:18

I think it might be... in the sense that they are all ADHD in the office and haven't got around to redesigning it since 2003 Grin

OP posts:
PolterGoose · 29/10/2015 17:22

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