Support thread for women who suspect or know they have ASD traits or are on the spectrum

[OxfordBags]

Hello, all! As the title says, I hope this can be a support thread for those of us who suspect or know we have some (or many) Aspergic traits; where we can share experiences, stories, problems, worries, knowledge and info, and hopefully benefit and help each other too.

I found a great link a while ago that is very comprehensive in its description of how Asperger's presents in women and how women experience it. Some of it is strikingly different from the male model and how most people perceive Asperger's. Here: ASD in women

I truly believe two things: 1) that ASD in females is woefully misunderstood and under-diagnosed and 2) that our current understanding and the definition of the AS Spectrum is, in itself, rather ASD in its rigidity, and that there is an actual spectrum of traits much broader and more nuanced than the current model, and that there are a hell of a lot of people struggling with some very typical ASD traits, who nevertheless do not have all the traits required to fulfil a formal diagnosis of having Asperger's or High-Functioning Autism.

So, with that rather typically ASD-style long-winded and unnecessarily detailed intro out of the way, let's chat!

112. has been ages since the last time I took the AQ test but I think I score about 35/36 on that.

Looking at the statements for that and the AQ test does actually help me pinpoint where my issues lie. Which does help a lot.

I have had some typical 'me' issues with the scoring and filling it out though. There's a couple of questions with 'I always' in them. It's not true that I 'always' do them, I do sometimes or often do them. But it's not true that I never do them either. For some reason this bothers me. I scored them as 0 for 'never done' because it's true that nether as an adult or a child have I 'always' done those things.

I got 140.5 on that one. Everything was highlighted! I've never done an eq.

I can't work out what the score means on that test - I got 135, I think but I found it very hard to keep track. I score highly on the other one

Buffy - I do that! I CANNOT look at someone when they say something nice to me. People comment on it. I put it down to shyness but it makes me squirm and I look at the floor or turn away. I appreciate that it appears silly or rude but I just can't do it.

I just scored 27 on the eq. Apparently I am lacking a lot in that area!

I have no idea what the scores mean anyway!

124 on the RAADS test (with 39 for sensory which is high compared to overall score). So, like the other test, that puts me in a bit of a no-man's land between NT and ASD!

Agree with comments up thread that the "we're all in the spectrum" view isn't helpful, but also think that's different from saying that there are people, like me I think, who would not meet the diagnostic criteria for ASD but are closer to it than most average NT people... If that makes sense? Think it would help me understand myself better this way than the "shy/quiet/geeky" labels I grew up with! (Ok geeky is actually true but I'm realising I'm not actually that shy or quiet, just anxious and a bit awkward!)

Re eye contact, yes to the compliments thing. Also find it much harder to make eye contact while I'm talking than when the other person is talking - think I feel more self conscious then. Just remembered that a recurring appraisal theme in the job I used to do (teaching post-grads) was need to work on eye contact with students when presenting!