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Bryony Gordon webchat: Join her on Tuesday 4 October, 9-10pm

71 replies

RachelMumsnet · 29/09/2016 15:50

Journalist Bryony Gordon is joining us on Tuesday 4 October between 9 and 10pm to chat about living with OCD, the subject of her latest book.

Bryony has written for The Telegraph for 15 years and her weekly column has won her an army of fans who have followed her journey from single girl-about-town to settled mum. She is now 35 and lives in ‘Nappy Valley’ with her young daughter and husband.

Bryony’s memoir, Mad Girl was our non-fiction book of the month in August, and recounts her experience of living a life ruled by OCD. One reader said:

“I applaud Bryony for her complete honesty and admire her bravery writing open-heartedly about such a sensitive personal matter, which she did in such a fearless and often hilarious way. I cannot remember ever reading a book which made me laugh out loud one minute and cry the next - that shows the strength of prose in this amazing book... I urge you all to read it to have a better understanding of mental health issues - let's lift the taboo, get talking about it, and give strength to all of us who are the 'one in four'!"

Come and chat to Bryony and put your questions to her on Tuesday evening between 9 and 10pm. If you’re unable to join us then, please do post up a question in advance on this thread.

We're delighted that Bryony will be also joining us as one of our speakers at Blogfest 16 - you can see the full programme here.

Bryony Gordon webchat: Join her on Tuesday 4 October, 9-10pm
sarahsusannah · 04/10/2016 21:53

That's really sound advice, Bryony. I can tell from the book that you're very close to your parents and I guess that closeness has been pretty important to you. You've made me think back to my own state of mind when I was growing up and I hope that will be useful to my relationship with my son in due course too. So thank you!

JammieD · 04/10/2016 21:54

Thanks so much for answering my question - it's sweet of you to say I'm a good mother - must say I don't always feel like one Smile Leaving leaflets around is a good idea - thought about buying her your book too - is it suitable for a 16 year old (she's fairly robust!) IS there any other piece of advice or action your mum took when you were a teenager that stuck in your mind as being really helpful (or indeed unhelpful?)

BryonyGordon · 04/10/2016 21:55

Just over 5 minutes left and I wanted to send a load of love to any mums out there who are not loving parenting right now... you are really not alone. This won't last forever. YOU ARE DOING AN AMAZING THING, and amazing things are not always the easiest to achieve. xxx

Experts' posts:
JangleBangle · 04/10/2016 21:56

Thank you so much, Bryony, for your reply. If you don't mind, I would like to send you an email.
We have found that we have received lots of advice and support with his physical disabilities but none for his mental ones.

BryonyGordon · 04/10/2016 21:57

@JammieD

Thanks so much for answering my question - it's sweet of you to say I'm a good mother - must say I don't always feel like one Smile Leaving leaflets around is a good idea - thought about buying her your book too - is it suitable for a 16 year old (she's fairly robust!) IS there any other piece of advice or action your mum took when you were a teenager that stuck in your mind as being really helpful (or indeed unhelpful?)

i think my book is ok for 16 year olds! I'd just say that however frustrating things get, remember that they don't want to be this way. They'd do anything to feel better! x

Experts' posts:
BryonyGordon · 04/10/2016 21:57

@JangleBangle

Thank you so much, Bryony, for your reply. If you don't mind, I would like to send you an email. We have found that we have received lots of advice and support with his physical disabilities but none for his mental ones.

please do!

Experts' posts:
BryonyGordon · 04/10/2016 21:58

@sarahsusannah

That's really sound advice, Bryony. I can tell from the book that you're very close to your parents and I guess that closeness has been pretty important to you. You've made me think back to my own state of mind when I was growing up and I hope that will be useful to my relationship with my son in due course too. So thank you!

thank YOU. For being you. Be kind to yourself, always. x

Experts' posts:
Cocolepew · 04/10/2016 22:00

Hi Bryony, sorry I haven't heard if you before Blush but this caught my eye because my DD has OCD.
It was in the form of ibtrusive thoughts at 11yo, she imagined slitting her throat amongst other things.
Shes now 18 and still has anxiety and a bit of checking but is so much better. She had some private therapy at the time of her breakdown.
I just want people who have children suffering it can get better.
Im looking forward to reading your book Smile

RachelMumsnet · 04/10/2016 22:00

That almost brings us to a close. Thanks so much for getting through all the questions and offering such warm and wise advice. It's great to hear about mental health mates and here's Bryony's details again for anyone who is interested in joining in - [email protected]

Bryony is one of our key note speakers at Blogfest on November 12 at Kings Place, Kings Cross - more info here - and we're really looking forward to you join ing us there. Just before you leave - please share with us...what is your favourite biscuit? Over to you and thanks again ...

OP posts:
BryonyGordon · 04/10/2016 22:00

Bed time! A big thank you to everyone who took part, and Mumsnet for having me. I'm looking forward to meeting some of you at Blogfest next month! I'd also like to say: be kind to yourself. You are awesome. We are all human, all flawed, and that's what makes us so excellent. BIG LOVE MUMSNET! xx

Experts' posts:
missphilippa28 · 04/10/2016 22:00

Evening although it's night, and you can't say goodnight anyway hello... I read and re read your book and cried and re cried. I just want to say bravo and as a fellow long list MH issue sufferer where do you begin for help.
I have no friends, and a single mum to two ( 7&5) at 26 the NHS seem to be terrible I wondered if you ever went down the public route? And tips for going at it alone .....

BryonyGordon · 04/10/2016 22:01

@RachelMumsnet

That almost brings us to a close. Thanks so much for getting through all the questions and offering such warm and wise advice. It's great to hear about mental health mates and here's Bryony's details again for anyone who is interested in joining in - [email protected]

Bryony is one of our key note speakers at Blogfest on November 12 at Kings Place - m ore info here - and we're really looking forward to you join ing us there. Just before you leave - please share with us...what is your favourite biscuit? Over to you and thanks again ...

Is a jaffa cake a biscuit? If so, JAFFA CAKES FOR THE WIN!

Experts' posts:
BryonyGordon · 04/10/2016 22:02

@missphilippa28

Evening although it's night, and you can't say goodnight anyway hello... I read and re read your book and cried and re cried. I just want to say bravo and as a fellow long list MH issue sufferer where do you begin for help. I have no friends, and a single mum to two ( 7&5) at 26 the NHS seem to be terrible I wondered if you ever went down the public route? And tips for going at it alone .....

give me an email! it's above xxx

Experts' posts:
BryonyGordon · 04/10/2016 22:03

@Cocolepew

Hi Bryony, sorry I haven't heard if you before Blush but this caught my eye because my DD has OCD. It was in the form of ibtrusive thoughts at 11yo, she imagined slitting her throat amongst other things. Shes now 18 and still has anxiety and a bit of checking but is so much better. She had some private therapy at the time of her breakdown. I just want people who have children suffering it can get better. Im looking forward to reading your book Smile

Thank you so much Cocolepew! I love this and think it is a great, positive note to end on. It can get better people, and it does! Sweet dreams all xx

Experts' posts:
SorchaMumsnet · 04/10/2016 22:04

TO ALL OUR ESTEEMED WEBCHAT READERS (THIS MEANS YOU)

Please take five minutes to answer a survey about your webchat experience this evening

Whether you’re a lurker, a regular or someone who’s wandered in off the wilder shores of t’internet - we want to know how Mumsnet webchats are working out for ya

There’s a lovely PRIZE of vouchers for the store of your choice for one lucky respondent

(We’ll be posting this link on lots of upcoming webchat threads as we want to get a wide range of views)

Thank you!
MNHQ

Cocolepew · 04/10/2016 22:05

Flip sorry about leaving words out and typos! I was rushing Blush

LineyReborn · 04/10/2016 22:06

Thank you to Bryony. You answered a lot of questions, really honestly. Flowers

LSAR · 04/10/2016 22:06

As a OCD and Anxiety suffer this book was very in point with the
day to day issues i face and it is nice to feel somewhat normal in the
OCD sense of word. The book is very informal and honest. OCD can be a lonely mental illness but the more people speak out about their experiences the more we help others. Thank You for the Book

hollyisalovelyname · 05/10/2016 11:40

Bryony
GrinGrinGrin
Thank you.

ImperialBlether · 05/10/2016 11:49

On the questionnaire we're asked:

Did reading the webchat prompt you to become a Mumsnet member - perhaps because you wanted to be able to post a question?

If we were already a member, what are we meant to answer there?

Me2017 · 05/10/2016 14:22

Really interesting, thanks.
I just looked up Pure OCD as despite saying above I know a lot about OCD obviously I don't as I'd not heard that term.
I found this:
"What is Pure O?

Commonly referred to as ‘Pure O’ by the OCD community, ‘Pure O’ is a form of OCD where people mistakenly believe that it differs from traditional OCD, in that it features no outward compulsive manifestations; instead, the anxiety-inducing obsessions take place only in the mind.

However, a person with ‘Pure O’ will still have compulsions which mainly manifest as unseen mental rituals, and they will usually also engage in compulsive behaviours like seeking reassurance from loved ones, and avoidance of particular objects, places or people. They are compulsions, nonetheless, which is why the term ‘Pure O’ is somewhat imprecise.

Pure O is like any other form of OCD, it will involve both obsessions and compulsions which are the problems that need addressing through Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)."

I suppose it's not surprising that those people with OCD with visible manifestations are likely to be those more of us have come across but both compulsions are going to be as bad as each other.

Good luck to everyone dealing with OCD or helping a child with it.
I support the view above not necessarily acceding to all demands a teenager might place on the parent but it can be useful if both parent and child (separately) can see the teenager's psychiatrist or psychologist to make sure what is done at home fits in with what is medically indicated for that teenager.

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