Eating in the supermarket

[tallulah]

As an aside from my other thread about children misbehaving in shops- the other thing that wound me up yesterday is this trend for letting children eat in the supermarket. The child in the trolley at the next till had a bag of grapes she'd been eating. She must have had 1/2 lb, so that's about 50p? Would her mother have thought it OK to give her, say, a twix, or a Begian Bun without paying for it?

I don't agree with this on 3 counts

1. people shouldn't be eating in any shop & teaching a child that they can is not a good idea
2. this is theft & if everyone did it then the supermarkets losses would be passed on to everyone
3. children also should be taught that you can't have something until it's paid for.

Before you all jump on me and say it's better than having them screaming, I have got 4 myself & I have been through this. Mine quickly learned that no screaming inside meant they could get to eat a treat outside when we'd finished.

Absolutely never. I tell the children that eating stuff you haven't paid for is stealing. Whether or not you intend to pay for it later is beside the point.
Feel very strongly about this one.

No time to read through all this, but my solution has always been to buy DS's snack/fruit etc first, ie grab it, go to fast checkout, pay for it then shove it in his hot little hand and get on with shopping in peace.
Sorry if this has been said.

sed, most of us here are referring to their little pre-schoolers here. I think lessons in stealing can wait until they have learnt what money is!!! (and where it comes from, and what paper rounds are for?)

Yes Lil... my ds isn't even 2 yet. I'm not going to lecture him on the moral implications of eating a grape before the check out.

Come to think of it, I often put a toy in the baby's hands to keep him amused and if he's mangled it beyond recognition, usually feel guilty enough to pay for it at the end rather than put it back. Usually.

I'm with prufrock - I had to eat or collapse when pregnant. It comes over you quite suddenly too. When pregnant with DS1, I had to take snacks to work to eat just before my lunchtime, as a woman in my office always insisted on taking the earliest lunch-break, leaving me to wait until 1pm for my lunch. I would have fainted clean away to wait that long.

I'm with marynz too. I would be very wary of eating a pre-packed snack or piece of fruit that I had bought from another shop beforehand. They might think I was stealing it. I like to have the receipt handy in case I'm questioned, and I like it to have been bought from the supermarket I'm in. Seems cheeky otherwise.

Tossum your post made me laugh - I think Tallulah should take a chill pill because I have read both your posts ie. this one and the other one about other peoples kids misbehaving. Being a parent is hard work and not always easy as a mum of 4 you should know that.

Re internet shopping - I do mine with Tesco's and it takes me between 5 and 10 minutes to do the whole shop, plus putting the shopping away when it's been delivered. Worth every penny. And 95% of the time they can deliver next day, although admittedly I am a sahm so that makes finding a time slot easier.
I go the shops maybe once a month with one or more children because I think it's good for them. Plus once a week I pop into the small local supermarket to buy more milk, bread etc.
Can't emphasise enough, what a difference internet shopping has made to my life.

My ds (20 months) clamours for grapes when he sees them. I pre-weigh them, then he gets a small bag. Will stop letting him do this when he's old enough to understand that he can eat them when we get home. My others 3, 5, 7 don't bother asking for food in the shop although I usually let them choose something for eating at home for lunch.

Hi everyone, Brilliant thread, I've just spent nearly an hour reading it all (how long can I make my post-operation recuperation last? I have tons of time for mumsnet while I can't do laundry, cooking etc)

You all stop at unweighed grapes?? Last year my ds developed a passion for fresh peas, and I used to give him 3 or 4 pods to open and eat the peas from while I was shopping. see, no problem with washing them. One day I offered him smarties, and he chose peas instead (shocked me too).

I agree that the supermarkets make enough profits from us to withstand parents doing this. If profits rose, I don't think they'd pay the staff more anyway, they would just pay shareholders a bigger dividend.

When it's not the pea season, then ds often has a packet of crisps or sommink, then we pay at the end. He reads his comic while we're going round too, and pay for that at the end.

Oh, my posh plastic peg basket broke last week (helped by ds) Now I keep my pegs in a Sainsbury's carrier bag. Posh, me ???

I can't believe I'm reading this thread. I honestly don't think I'm moralistic or a control freak - but the food simply isn't yours till you've paid for it. Yes, the supermarkets make big profits, yes, you plan to pay for it, but again that isn't the point. It's stealing.
(Don't you also worry that you'll forget one day and walk out without paying for the stuff your kids have already eaten?)
Am I a completely lone voice? Should I have changed my name?

sed - am tempted to say "get a life". What I do in the supermarket is none of your business, but am worried that it might come across as confrontational and horrid

But truthfully, I can't see why anyone's got a problem with it. I'm happy. DS is happy and not bothering ANYONE, and the supermarket staff all seem over the moon for him to eat whatever he likes - and we ALWAYS pay. It's only theft if you actually walk out of the store without having paid.

sed do you pay for your meals in a restaurant BEFORE eating them??????

that's not theft

Sed - I think you are WAAAAAY overreacting here. As I said - my dp works in one of these Supermarkets and the staff DONT MIND!!!! And if they don't mind then who are we talking about here??? Am I to assume that we don't do it just in case it offends another mother who has very different 'morals' regarding this???

Just exactly who are we trying not to upset?

This thread is too funny. DS (15 months) gets a snack going round the supermarket if he's creating, but is usually too busy trying to nick things from passing shelves. He does invariably kick off when we get to the till though, so then those nice people have to help us pack & have even offered to help us down to the carpark. His favourite is cherry tomatoes - the pre-priced packs of course

I have just come from shoppung trip with Ds 16 months.He snacked on Cheese String while we were there. I did consider that giving him this might teach him that he can eat anything in the supermarket he likes but i think by the time he is old enough to understand the concept of stealing he will also understand the concept of paying for things.
By the way , i am from Australia, it is considered perfectly natural to try fruit such as grapes or cherries before you buy them.

This thread is hilarious, it's funny what people can get worked up about...
For the record, I'm with the "rather a snack than a tantrum" brigade here. Always something that's got a barcode, mind, and I always pay for it.
Also agree with slug re: baskets (I don't drive either and I know what you mean...)
I've tried internet shopping but got fed up with the stupid substitutions (especially when I specified NO substitutions)
Finally, clothe pegs: I use a little rattan basket, is that posh or not?

Sed, you are not alone in your opinion. I'm not sure I share your passion in the subject - I think it is between the individual and their conscience. However, I don't give my DD food I haven't paid for as I believe it is stealing and therefore setting a bad example.

I've really enjoyed this thread too, thanks Tallulah for starting it. We have another snacker but go to a supermarket where there is always something interesting to try on offer at the entrance, and where you are offered a taste of anything from the deli if you are not sure of your choice. We do stick to pre-packed, because I'm a fruit-washer too, and because I don't want people to think we are taking anything it's problematic to pay for, and in two and a half years of weekly shopping I have never forgotten to stump up our 24p for our individual triangle of Camembert. It's ds' little treat for being pretty good and helpful round the supermarket, helping us choose salads, veg and deli items. Considering we spend in excess of 400 times that amount weekly, I don't feel at all uneasy about this and clearly neither do the shop management.

Obviously if your child is too young to understand the concept of stealing they are probably the right age for a tit in the mouth. Those trolleys are just about the right height and you'll find that most of the male staff are only too happy to help you pack the shopping.

Just come back from the shoe shop....ds tried on shoes and wore them to the till!!!! Before I'd paid for them!!! (Don't mean to be facetious, just I'd been reading the thread and it just occurred to me in the shop).