Eating in the supermarket

[tallulah]

As an aside from my other thread about children misbehaving in shops- the other thing that wound me up yesterday is this trend for letting children eat in the supermarket. The child in the trolley at the next till had a bag of grapes she'd been eating. She must have had 1/2 lb, so that's about 50p? Would her mother have thought it OK to give her, say, a twix, or a Begian Bun without paying for it?

I don't agree with this on 3 counts

1. people shouldn't be eating in any shop & teaching a child that they can is not a good idea
2. this is theft & if everyone did it then the supermarkets losses would be passed on to everyone
3. children also should be taught that you can't have something until it's paid for.

Before you all jump on me and say it's better than having them screaming, I have got 4 myself & I have been through this. Mine quickly learned that no screaming inside meant they could get to eat a treat outside when we'd finished.

Oh and gosh2 - yesI did have to eat or collapse. I had hyperemesis for 16 weeks, could only eat/drink very small amounts without throwing up and so had very little energy. So if I did happen to forget to take my bottle of lucozade with me in my pregnancy addled state I would have to drink something that I hadn't yet paid for, or collapse. Which I did do a few times.

Honestly - do some of you actually have children? Because the judgemental attitudes on display remind me remarkably of my own when I was 20 and childless and didn't have a clue just how bloody hard the whole business was.

ps, I don't think the petrol analogy is quite right - I've never left the store with anything I've not paid for, even with the intention of going back and paying later.

gosh2, I just think that you must be loaded and can afford shopping online for 2 items or dropping off your offspring at nursery as much as you like without worrying about the cost.

Obviously when you were pregnant you always had an assistant carrying your grapes and sandwiches for you and wetting your lips any time you needed it.
Most of us unfortunately can't afford that...

Batters, hello. Thanks, been in France just got back.

Agree with Soupy online shopping . Cupboards are bare and can I get a slot before Thursday??

Why dont they open 24 hours on Sunday for non religious, useless mother/wives like me who can never be organised.

You see I so disagree that the woman next to you was right to give you a bollocking, Gosh2. She made you feel so bad about 3 measelly little grapes that you've been driven out of the supermarket! That's not good. If she'd kept her big mouth shut the world would be a better place, IMO. Internet shopping is very useful indeed but I'm happy my kids get the chance to shop in person, sometimes. They are nowadays lovely, helpful shoppers and make the old ladies laugh while they debate the merits of different boxes of cereal in their high pitched voices. They haven't always been this happy in a supermarket though, and I would have been rather cross if someone had told me off for giving them yummy frubes to shut them up when they whinged, which I clearly remember doing on a regular basis a couple of years back!

I always take a drink and Organics Bar for ds, if I think that he might be hungry in a supermarket. I do not think that it is wrong per se to allow children to eat things in supermarkets, as long as they have a barcode so that they can be paid for, (I do think that weighable things should be left alone). However, I am personally against it, and I hate seeing people ripping open packets to give their children food that they haven't paid for yet. I don't know why, but I always think that they have no intention of paying for them. Also, they always seem to give their children things that need weighing, like bread rolls/bananas/grapes, almost as if they know that they will get away with not paying for them. Maybe that is just the people who live in my area (It's dead rough in Colchester you know!)

by the way, I hate shopping online. I like to choose my sandwiches and fruit personally...
Also, my midwife recommended to walk to the shops... Mumsnet is my only excuse to be online!

Xanthe, is your post for real or a p**s take? If the later respect! If the former.......WHAAAAT. Seriously, do other mums see this as a problem? I have so much more to worry about and quite frankly, couldn't give a toss if my kids ate the odd grape! And yes, they are allowed to look at the comics while I am doing the shopping (small shop, small village, everyone knows who is doing what with whom, before this starts a neglected children thread!) If they damaged the comic, I would go bananas and then pay for it, but they never have, to date.

I really thought most parents had the same opinion. Out of interest, we have lived in Holland for the last couple of years and the minute you walk into a butchers, a cheese shop or bakers, the assistants automatically ask the parents if the kids would like a piece of sausage, cheese etc. Maybe things are more chilled here, but I like the way it works.

Disagree with you, Tallulah but nice thread!

BTW, I'm not judging anyone on here who has done it, and I never say never. I may have to resort to it one day...sorry in advance if I offended anyone.

Not loaded, more embarassed about the time DS did eat and the lady told me off. I try to be organised and get shopping on line done, when you think about the time you spend in the supermarket, I mean its busy, its stressful, you have to queue, its no fun for children, I hate saying no to the children, I hate the sweets at the counter, the petrol spent queuing to get there, finding a space, NO mother and toddler spaces, as there are workmens vans parked in them. AAAAGH - do you now see what I mean, £5 once a week is ok to pay. But I wouldnt pay it twice a week. I did once use the free coupon to order about 4 items!!

I always had to go back to Tescos in person the next day to return rubbish substitutions!

happyspider do you have a Waitrose near you? They do a delivery service, so you can go and do your shopping yourself, then when you get to the checkout they pack it all up for you and delivery it later. It has been an absolute lifesaver for me as we don't have a car, but a weeks shopping is far too much to carry home on foot.

I love shopping and I have never eaten anything without paying for it. I have never stole anything in my life. My ds does get fed before he goes too!! I cant understand what all the fuss is about.
P.S I would never eat in clothes/electrical shops etc nor would I allow my children as it has signs before you walk in one of them being
NO FOOD TO BE CONSUMED
does it actually have this sign in a supermarket entrance, I think not.

To all of you who are offended by me giving my DS food in the supermarket:

1. No, I can't leave him at nursery while I shop, because I don't have that luxury - while he's in nursery (full-time), I work (full-time).

2. No, I don't WANT to do it on the bleeding internet, and have some spotty youth picking and substituting all the wrong things, whilst palming me off with their grottiest fresh stuff. At the same time, I can't afford the most expensive stuff, and I get by by buying lots of marked down food that doesn't appear on the web.

3. DS does not drive, so can't do the big shop.

4. I'm not doing anyone else any harm, and I actually like doing it this way, so get off my case.

Aaahhhhhh, Have you no lives, people who stress about 3 grapes! And I must add that I feel COMPLETELY pissed off with the argument that you should leave your kids elsewhere whilst you shop.(Sure, on their own in the car maybe) My kids are 7, 5 and 19 months, I shop most days, they come with me, I spend a fortune at my local supermarket and, IMO, they welcome me and my constantly hungry children. My dh is often away, I live with no family nearby, friends are min 10 kms away, and why the hell should my I have to internet shop Who exactly am I offending?

The trick with online shopping is to get them to deliver all the dull stuff like tinned goods, and washing powders, cleaning stuff, catfood, nappies etc etc all of which you know is the same stuff time after time. THEN you can go and support your local shops, and get your meat from the butchers, veggies from the grocers etc etc. The kids benefit more from this probably - it's much more personal!

(Then you can shout across to the friendly grocer "Oi - is it OK if my kids have a coupla grapes to try? - don't suppose you'd be a dear and run them under the tap for me" LOL )

Oh I'm enjoying this thread very much! Thanks Tallulah.

oxocube - don't forget to leave the window open a crack though - it'd be cruel otherwise...

Well its partly YOUR fault that DS (21 months) gets fed on the way round, starting with bananas, biscuits then crips, I know! - All paid for at the end, I hasten to add. I always said I'd never do that, but you guys on another thread said it was fine, so now I do.

I think the point is, in a clothes shop they cannot see things to eat. Toy shops are different, again, it is all there to tempt them! and yes I have also unwrapped a 'Harold the Helicopter' then buying an empty box.

Which is worse a screaming child or one eating a banana? As I am the one six inches away from said child - I prefer the banana.

OK I wasn't going to say anything because I have already expressed my views on this subject in the past but hey I'm bored so here goes!

I have a DS1 (aged 4) and a DS2 (aged 11 months) and I in all honesty can say that they have never been given anything to eat on the way round the supermarket that hasn't been paid for. I take a snack and a drink from home for them, usually get DS1 to eat this on the way to the supermarket and DS2's is kept in case he is grizzly on the way round. All the supermarkets in my area have cafes that provide childrens meals and snacks at reasonable prices and usually offer free jars of baby food and I find this useful to fall back on if shopping time coincides with dinner.

All the nicked grapes (I'm not talking about trying one to see if they are any good) and bananas etc add up. I understand what others are saying about giving them something to eat that you are going to pay for (something in a barcoded packet) but I have taken the personal decision to teach my children not to eat or use something until it is paid for. Example being a couple of weeks ago my DS2 took a fancy to a teddy in the George dept of ASDA, I thought it was cute and he might like to play with it on the way round the shop, I could have paid with it along with my shopping but decided to pay for it in the George dept before my DS2 got it to play with. I'm not necessarily saying I am right as I can understand what others are saying that it makes no difference as long as the goods are paid for it is just the way I feel and the example I want to give my children.

BTW I put the parking ticket between my teeth when in a multi-story car park. Where else do you put it without causing an accident?

Berlimey, we can't half talk about supermarkets, can't we!!!
Gosh2, I have to take the car park ticket out of my mouth in order to put my shopping list in my mouth instead. Perhaps if I put the ticket in one child's mouth and the list in the other child's mouth it would stop them getting hungry.
I like shopping online. They don't always deliver exactly what you order so sometimes it's a nice surprise!! Also, sometimes they deliver something completely out of the blue and you get to keep it cos it's not worth them coming back for it. I got 12 free yoghurts that way recently and 18 choc mini rolls before that.

I think that it is a conspiracy. All the healthy items in the shops (bananas/grapes/bread rolls) are weighable, and all the cr*p is scannable. Not sure who is head of this conspiracy, but hey, I'm paranoid!

Furball, I agree with you in principle, I would just give ds something that could be accurately paid for (i.e. something in a wrapper), so that I felt more 'honest'. I do not understand why, maybe I'm just mad...actually that is a very big possibility

I had a colleague who used to take her step-children into supermarkets and open all the multi-packets of crisps, to get the Tazzos from the bottom, without having to pay for the crisps. I think that is awful, and would feel as bad if I had given ds something without paying for it, even a grape.

If you don't take your kids shopping, where are you going to hide all the small stuff when you go through the checkout ?