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Original poster

I stormed off ineffectively

236 replies

Justask · 27/08/2018 14:10

I am totally BU.

On holiday and so drunk last night I tried to storm off but I couldn't work out how to leave the pool area of the hotel and just walked around the pool repeatedly, getting more cross with every circuit.

I am a total knob, please tell me IABU 😁

OP posts:
DolorestheNewt · 27/08/2018 17:54

Twat Bloke 2 sending a message, via a mutual friend, to Twat Bloke 1 (can't remember what they were clashing antlers about, something completely trivial). (It's funnier if you bear in mind that Twat Bloke 2 has a strong Glaswegian accent.)
"Well, you tell him, right, you tell him, that I'll see him on Monday, right, outside the [xxx], and we'll settle it. We'll fucking settle it, OK? But tell him not to be late, because there's something on BBC that I want to watch at 9.00."

Opensesame1 · 27/08/2018 18:36

Aww I love this thread.. I have yet to do this but I was fortunate enough to witness an epic one..

At a house party in the early hours of the morning and we were all bickering among ourselves about something trivial.. one of the group stood up and made a very loud speech about how we were all a disgrace and should be ashamed of ourselves and while still ranting about how he wouldn't stay at the shit party if we paid him he gathered up all his stuff (3 or 4 bags of crap) and strapped his guitar to his back and flounced out rather dramatically. Literally less than 5 minutes later he flounced back in and began a new rant about how if he had anywhere else to go he would leave right this second but seeing as he didn't he was going to sit in the other room.. this was years ago and still makes me laugh!!!

Opensesame1 · 27/08/2018 18:36

Aww I love this thread.. I have yet to do this but I was fortunate enough to witness an epic one..

At a house party in the early hours of the morning and we were all bickering among ourselves about something trivial.. one of the group stood up and made a very loud speech about how we were all a disgrace and should be ashamed of ourselves and while still ranting about how he wouldn't stay at the shit party if we paid him he gathered up all his stuff (3 or 4 bags of crap) and strapped his guitar to his back and flounced out rather dramatically. Literally less than 5 minutes later he flounced back in and began a new rant about how if he had anywhere else to go he would leave right this second but seeing as he didn't he was going to sit in the other room.. this was years ago and still makes me laugh!!!

Opensesame1 · 27/08/2018 18:36

Aww I love this thread.. I have yet to do this but I was fortunate enough to witness an epic one..

At a house party in the early hours of the morning and we were all bickering among ourselves about something trivial.. one of the group stood up and made a very loud speech about how we were all a disgrace and should be ashamed of ourselves and while still ranting about how he wouldn't stay at the shit party if we paid him he gathered up all his stuff (3 or 4 bags of crap) and strapped his guitar to his back and flounced out rather dramatically. Literally less than 5 minutes later he flounced back in and began a new rant about how if he had anywhere else to go he would leave right this second but seeing as he didn't he was going to sit in the other room.. this was years ago and still makes me laugh!!!

Opensesame1 · 27/08/2018 18:36

Aww I love this thread.. I have yet to do this but I was fortunate enough to witness an epic one..

At a house party in the early hours of the morning and we were all bickering among ourselves about something trivial.. one of the group stood up and made a very loud speech about how we were all a disgrace and should be ashamed of ourselves and while still ranting about how he wouldn't stay at the shit party if we paid him he gathered up all his stuff (3 or 4 bags of crap) and strapped his guitar to his back and flounced out rather dramatically. Literally less than 5 minutes later he flounced back in and began a new rant about how if he had anywhere else to go he would leave right this second but seeing as he didn't he was going to sit in the other room.. this was years ago and still makes me laugh!!!

JovialNickname · 27/08/2018 18:45

One of my college friends (we were 17 at the time) got sacked -justifiably- from her job in a fast food restaurant. She burst into tears, loudly, and wailed all the way down the two flights of stairs to the exit, where the door slammed behind her. There was then another bang and the sound of ever-mounting howling gradually increased as she came back up the two flights of stairs to retrieve her coat, then retreated into the distance as she stropped back down and out again

wanderings · 27/08/2018 19:16

@JovialNickname She failed to "go and fetch her hat and coat" before leaving the building for ever!

I once made not a flounce, but a memorable exit. I rarely dawdle: I tend to move everywhere briskly, with a sense of purpose. Once when I was leaving a client's house, a decorative part of the door handle got caught in my ring. The pain was excruciating, and the ring very deformed! However I managed to remove it from my finger so it could be repaired. Blush

wanderings · 27/08/2018 19:18

My aunt (as a teenager) allegedly slammed the front door so hard, the glass fell out. She glanced back and saw her mother's furious eyes glaring at her from where the glass used to be!

Lookatyourwatchnow · 27/08/2018 19:26

I flounced out of a house party furiously following a minor disagreement, but without putting my shoes on. I didn't want to ruin the flounce/was too embarrassed to go back for them after immediately calming down.

I called a taxi and waited for it in bouncing down rain in my socks and then complained to the taxi driver all the way home, who agreed that I was right, about the non issue.

Host sent me a message asking if I was ok as I had gone without my shoes. I casually replied explaining that I didn't want the shoes anyway and to please put them in the bin (I did want them)

glintandglide · 27/08/2018 19:28

I’m crying at “I didn’t want the shoes anyway” waahhhhh

HateIsNotGood · 27/08/2018 19:29

DM (now RIP) flounced out after I finally defended my DF in my mid-40s (her still blaming me for being like DF - they had been divorced 30 years after DMs divorce - I'd got over it decades before). It was about midnight and I lived in the middle of nowhere and she faced a 5+hour drive home.

She came back in after 30mins (of sitting in her car) - I said "so you came back then - would you like some tea?"

She never flounced or said anything similar again - so effective really I s'pose.

IfyouseeRitaMoreno · 27/08/2018 19:37

She once tried to throw a pack of basil at the kitchen wall and it gracefully floated to the floor.

What a wonderfully middle-class flounce!

SavageBeauty73 · 27/08/2018 19:42

I once had a go at my sons about the state of their bedroom and stormed out. I managed to trip over the hoover they hadn't used in the hallway and fall down the stairs. As I lay on the floor, I shouted up use the bloody hoover. All I can hear was laughter.

HateIsNotGood · 27/08/2018 19:44

Forgot to say that I flounced from a Client today using the exact phrase "Russian Prostitutes and Hull Tables" - neither of which is connected but hopefully he understood and will pay up shortly.

Or I'm turning into my Mum.

PixieBigShoes · 27/08/2018 19:47

My son tried to slam a tent door and then stomped into his pod to have a rant to his imaginary friend.

HateIsNotGood · 27/08/2018 19:49

Laughing completely at ...."all I could hear was laughter".... savage.

DownstairsMixUp · 27/08/2018 19:52

When I first started seeing my dh I would come to stay weekends with him in a town 70 Miles from me so I was very unfamiliar with it, I also didn't drive at the time. Once I flounced and it was ineffective because

  1. he lived on a field with a unlit pathway to a main road

  2. the train station was 2 miles away

Worst flounce ever

MalloryLaurel · 27/08/2018 19:59

StarTrekForMe, I really enjoyed that story.
One of the times I flounced, I forgot my glasses so had to let myself back in and get them. No where near as good as yours Star!

Gavlaaar · 27/08/2018 20:12

I had an argument with my sister last week as she kept criticising my driving (I'm newly passed, she's failed loads of times but non stop criticises when I'm trying to concentrate). Just after the argument, she asked if I knew where I was going. I said, 'see this is what I mean! Of course I do' and made the wrong turn and had to drive the whole way back round the car park BlushBlush

stayathomer · 27/08/2018 20:17

Everyone has stormed off ineffectively at some stage or another, don't worr about it OP!

JoyceDivision · 27/08/2018 20:23

In my teenage years I wore a fab long me litary style wool coat... I flounced out of the pub one night and got it stuck in the door Blush

CheeseGirl4 · 27/08/2018 20:27

I flounced out of the house as a teen, but had bare feet and no money, so just sat on the kerb at the end of the driveway for an hour before sheepishly returning.

PhilomenaButterfly · 27/08/2018 20:28

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Rebecca36 · 27/08/2018 20:31

It's terrible when you can't make a dignified exit! Many have done the same.

Mokepon · 27/08/2018 20:35

Haha! Love these!
I once flounced out of the car after DH criticised my driving.
It was beautiful, I pulled over, threw the keys at him and said drive yourself home.
Just as it started to rain.
I walked 8 miles in a fucking downpour, without a jacket. Ignored him calling my mobile, so fierce was my indignant fury.
I was in agony the next day as I'd power marched through the rain and was frozen and soaked to the skin when I got back.
Complete and utter tube. (Me obvs, not him).