My husband has just caught me doing something terrible and embarrassing...

[PrettyRicky]

My DH came home unexpectedly and I was in the kitchen doing something I probably shouldn't have been doing but which I do every time I'm home alone.

I was having an imaginary interview on Radio 4 Woman's Hour about my new, hugely critically acclaimed novel.

DH walked in just as I was saying to Jane Garvey "That's an interesting question, Jane. The book's really a reflection on womanhood at times of crisis".

He was just stood there at the kitchen door and said "What is? Who's Jane?" and then looked around the corner to our dining table, presumably expecting to find someone called Jane who'd popped around for a brew.

Best story ever op!

I'm generally accepting a Grammy after my surprise debut album has gone platinum, even though I'm technically a bit over the hill at 37 to be a rock star.

Stroke I was recently devastated when I realised that, at nearly 40, I was really going to have to retire as Principal with the Royal Ballet, and move into choreography.

This has made my day - I am not alone . I probably spend more time in an imaginary world than I do the real one (I am far slimmer in the imaginary world too)

I am currently (in real life - not the imaginary world - that would be too weird) invigilating a mock exam - I think the loud snort has made it pretty clear I am not doing important work related stuff on my laptop - hopefully I have now covered that by looking at my planner as I am now obviously looking at important stuff and typing into said laptop

If DH caught me doing this there would be talk of hospitals

I think the saying is: Talking to yourself is the first sign of madness, answering yourself is the second.

I love this thread.

I write fanfiction (embarrassing) and when no ones around I act out vast swathes of dialogue (even more embarrassing). With accents and sound effects (potentially mortifying).

I haven't been found out yet but I'm sure its only a matter of time before I'm caught talking to the Grandmaster of the Templar order while chopping up veg.

Wow, my first classic. This is awesome.

I think the saying is: Talking to yourself is the first sign of madness, answering yourself is the second

And creating a whole series of imaginary lives where you achieve things which are basically impossible and are regularly interviewed by your most favourite radio and TV hosts is the third, yes?

This thread makes me feel so normal

I also have an ongoing epic fantasy story in my head. Lots of swords and sorcery. Very exciting and I get to gallop around with a sword doing heroic stuff and getting it on with men in big boots. I have had the same narritive and world going since I was a child. I sometimes worry I will get dementia or something and lose track of what is real and what is in my head. It all get confusing when I start telling my husband how I have to go and defeat the evil mage demon with my manly raven haired lover.

I always talk to myself when I'm alone and several times turned around to see DH or DS standing there looking

I go on the offensive and say it's mentally healthy.

I also do it in the car and if I get funny looks pretend I have an invisible mobile phone

PrettyRicky a thread in Classics! What does Jane Garvey have to say about it?

Oh dear. I'm going to have to go change my username now....

My husband once walked in on me trying to learn the very annoying cups song and shouting at a 12 year old on YouTube as it was just too hard! He had been on a works night out so just gazed at me blearily and said "I'll fetch a cup" as he wandered off to the kitchen.

We can both now, somewhat embarrassingly, do the cups song with both actions and words. Pitch Perfect has a lot to aswer for.

PrettyRicky I think talking to yourself and constructing a whole hinterland of make believe is actually the first sign of sanity. Imagine being stuck with reality; that'd send anybody mad.

BigBadgers Me too!

Perhaps a special care home should be opened for the Confused But Epic. Complete with foam swords, suitable staff uniforms, wizard staffs etc...

Actually that would be amazing, that is definitely the sort of care home I'd like to end up in ⚔️

YouOKHun That's very true actually

Tempus I bet she'd love it. I'll have to see when she interviews me tomorrow again. I wish I was a Tweeter, I'd send her the link to this thread I bet Jane Garvey talks to herself.

I also am a bit of a Sims obsessive and have a whole neighbourhood with interlocking stories going on. So far so normal. However, at night when I'm trying to sleep I imagine my Sims and all the things there doing while I'm not there.

I really should stop contributing to this thread, but it's just great to feel a wee bit normal about all the weird shit av had in my head the past 20 years.

I read the OP, but I missed her post immediately afterwards, saying there is no novel.
That makes this ten times better!

I have long arguments in my head about the misdemeanours and shortcomings of others. I put so much effort into these that I am disappointed when I get home and discover that DH did hang out the washing so my practised diatribe is wasted

BigBadgers and Spudlet me too, been doing it since childhood. Keep waiting to grow out of it but no sign just yet although some, ahem, adult themes have developed as time goes on!

Talking to yourself. Normal
Answering yourself. Normal

Arguing with yourself. Worrying

Arguing with yourself and losing - hell.

I loved the OP but your husband's response

" "I'll leave you to it then" made me ROFL.

Are we going to get to 1000 posts just expressing happiness?

HottySnanky Thu 19-Jan-17 13:39:58
Sometimes I like to imagine that I've been sent back in time to Henry VIII's time, to his bedroom, with a comprehensive pharmacy and array of surgical instruments so that I can miraculously cure his leg ulcer, explain how making and having babies actually works and stop him from turning into a hideous fat woman-killing manbeast.

I end up as his most trusted adviser. Think Mark Rylance but in pink scrubs. The other royal doctors end up hating me. It's great.

OH SHIT! ME TOO! This is so scary. I did this to the point where I actually looked into it so my "daydream" could be more realistic, and it turns out that it's really hard! I ended up reading about female physicians through history so I could work out how to get him to lose weight without being forced to have sex with him because he's king! My best strategy was to pose as a "foreigner" with folk remedies from some unfamiliar culture.

I am also not a doctor!!

This thread is such a relief because everyone I know thinks I'm insane

I feel normal after reading this thread

Seriously, best thread on MN ever

I always hold up the wire on my headphones when I'm walking around because it looks like I'm on the phone and speaking into the mic. But I'm not! I'm just talking to myself!!