Who wants to know what happens when a labrador eats a kilo of caster sugar?

[BellaGoth]

Don't worry, the dog is fine for now!

I got home from shopping this morning and 8 week old DD started crying for a feed. I quickly put away everything I thought was at risk from labrador investigation and sat to feed her. Ddog had a sniff round and then came to cuddle on the sofa. By the time I finished feeding DD it was time to collect DS from nursery.

It did not cross my mind for a second that ddog would split open the bag of sugar all over the living room carpet and eat the vast majority of it. I was wrong.

Obviously I called the vet straight away, who laughed told me he would be fine, just might be a bit hyper.

He threw up on our bed. Right through the duvet, through the mattress and onto the carpet. The super king sized mattress is a write-off.

On the up side, dh says we can go bed shopping at ikea. Deep joy!

This thread has cheered me up so much tonight.
We have 3 dogs, 2 Irish Wolfhounds boys and a mixed pavement special wee girl. They all work together, with our cat. We have to put all food very high up or rush to put everything away asap as the boys can reach every bloody thing, cooked or not. They have eaten a whole large lasagna, a mouse which the cat helpfully caught in the garden , one apple pie, a chicken salad and a whole bag of apples just this week alone, but we love them dearly, most of the time...

My mums labrador managed to eat a bucket of fish bait once, fuck knows how as it truly smells like the end of the world. Mum says the only smell worse than fishbait, is fishbait that has been partially digested and then vomited up all over the kitchen floor

When i was little we had a lurcher who had terrible separation anxiety. My mum used to put him in the kitchen when we went out. I remember him eating an entire jar of mustard, six floor tiles, a door frame, a skirting board, bars off a dog crate, housing insulation, part of a tumble dryer and some kind of spice. I think he also got to some of my dad's electrical equipment. They now have a German Shepherd who's soft as anything and just likes salmon. I've fostered some retired working dogs that had freaky eating habits. My favourite was the mallinois who ate his way through my birthday cake and actually bothered to look guilty afterwards

Crying with laughter reading this thread. Classics please!

When I was a baby we supposedly had a Golden who saved my mum the trouble of clearing up my potty ugh

We had 2 English Setters with didn't stomachs. They weren't too bothered about food except for 2 occasions. When dog first met now-DH he had a bag of shopping. The boy dog subtlety stole the loaf of white bread and ate the whole thing, leaving all other tasty tummy-upsetting options. The girl dog never stole until the French exchange student came for Christmas. Presents were under the tree and dog decided to eat the students presents from her parents, expensive perfumed French cosmetics. Couldn't get the lipstick off the dogs face for days ... or scowl off student's face (expensive last min shopping trip ensued)

Our Labrador puppy ate our dining room. Chewed through all the furniture, ate skirting boards and hacked plaster off the wall!

Ate our dining room

😂😂😂😂 I think you win

Aaaaaaaaand it's straight into Classics for this one!

As I was reading this, I noted the lampshade and then remembered that twatdog has eaten part of that too.

Sadly missed rescue cat enjoyed licking remains of curry off a plate and would sneak a swig of beer to wash it down if she could. She also had a penchant for emery boards, many a time I would find them hidden in her bed.

Ate the dining room is pure class.

I once bought a half price duck for DH and me, I think it cost about a fiver. We had our dinner and foolishly left the remains on the side. Our Ridgeback ate the lot. Bones and all. Our cheap dinner ended up costing £100 + in vets bills.

We now have a lab. He is gorgeous, but it's a constant challenge to keep human food for humans.

Oh and the time my straight-laced mum thought she was developing a drinking problem before we noticed the dog delicately drinking all her sherry.

Years ago our dog ate the reindeer food which DS and DD had sprinkled onto the lawn on Christmas Eve. He had pretty sparkly poo for days afterwards!

Our Bichon ate through several big bags of Haribo. We came home to find her sitting there surrounded by the packets. She had drunk all her water so we filled her bowl...big mistake. She instantly drank the full bowl of water walked around with a great big distended belly then threw up all the water and various gummy bear bits all over our lovely new very large and very unwashable rug!

My sisters dog ate a pair of tights 😮 It came to light when there was a bit of a problem in the toilet department.
It had a bit of trouble 'passing' them iykwim - she eventually held on to one end (the toe) and the daft mutt ran off and out they came, yuk.
The dog was absolutely fine, as were the tights once washed through.

Childhood boxer ate 4 burgers from the frying pan where they were cooking. No ill effects other than extremely short whiskers where he'd singed them off!

Darling dog now sadly passed ate some tinsel from the Christmas tree. For a few days she had a string of tinsel coming out of her a**e hole made all the more noticeable as her tail was a sticky up one. Was advised not to pull it out because it could have cut her.

Ddog ate walls, skirting boards, cars, sofas, shoes, pants and bras.

My parents' lab was obsessed with food; used to open the bin and garrotte herself on the side of it, front paws dangling, as she guzzled the contents.
Several times she would nuzzle tins and containers containing food off the worktop, onto the floor where they would break open and she would eat the contents. We'd come home to find the kitchen completely licked clean and none wide verity other than the (pristine) containers. Once she ate my sister's birthday cake, plus our Easter eggs, foil and all. Mum would go to the vet and have her stomach x-rayed on regular occasions. Twice she had to be opened up to remove rocks, metal etc. Once she ate a huge rotting pike that she discovered at a local lake.

The funniest time was when she stole a block of hashish resin from my friend... when he went to look for it I discovered half the block in her mouth. Half an hour later she was completely caned! Kept looking at me in bewilderment, then didn't get out of bed for about 36 hours.

We now have an impeccably behaved lab, who doesn't really act like a lab at all (she turned down my cheesy puffs earlier!) and I must say it's a relief to not worry about her stealing fishermen's bait or family picnics on our walks.

So many tails old ones are the best to tell!

My parent's dog (standard poodle) once ate 12 frozen chicken fillets. He also stole my purse and ate that. I was distraught as I'd had £100 in there. Turns out he was thrifty. The £100 was found later, tucked safely under his cushion!

My dog (half lab/half mutt full stupidity and full appetite of a lab ) once ate 5 Advent Calendars. The first was early Dec. The second, place "out of reach" a few days later. The FIFTH on the 20th December, a very distraught Grandad and a very lovely shop assistant trawled through a stock room to find it. Shop assistant insisted Dad took 2. Shop assistant was wise.

Ex SIL. Chocolate lab. Ate ANYTHING. Roast chickens. Pizza fresh from the oven (taken from the oven rack!) And an entire cheese board at Christmas. His finest moment was: having had a chew-toy removed from his intestine via incredibly expensive surgery, Ex SIL kept it for posterity (as you do ) in a drawer. Dog, many years later, opened the drawer and took out the prized intestinal relic. And ate it. Again. Ex SIL then asked the vet to dispose of it.

We were dog sitting for my friends black lab and he spent the afternoon outside in the sun.. Or so we thought. He sneaked his way into the garage and ate his way through a 40kg bag of sheep pellets and blood and bone fertiliser mix!! I couldn't believe it!! When they picked him up, he was green in the face but wasn't sick!

Black lab once stole a bag of fil's extremely expensive specialist bread flour. When we got home, it had combined with his slobber and formed into cement down both his front legs and round his face and chest. Despite being encased head to toe in rock hard plaster, he still tried to look innocent.

Another time he stole 2lbs of cherries. I have no idea how, but he pitted them all and spat the stones out all over the house, along with the stalks. But every sliver of fruit was gone.

Aaaaand another time he stole an entire chunk of Stilton from the cheeseboard. We were at a progressive dinner party but hosting dessert and the cheese course, so had laid everything out on the cheese board and thrown a clean cloth over it while we tootled off for the first two courses at other houses various. When we got back, (slightly the worse for wear) the cloth was on the kitchen floor. I thought it was a bit weird, and I knew something was wrong, but not quite what. Then I noticed the huge gap right in the middle of the cheeseboard. Somehow he had managed to extricate it from the centre, without moving anything else, no hairs, no sign at all that anything was wrong. Until you caught his eye and he was doing that 'nothing to see here' face.

Previous incarnation stole a litre of Ribena and an apple turnover. I opened the front door and thought there had been an actual massacre.

Not as bad as my friend's dog though, who ate six super plus tampons. That was jolly expensive. Once they absorb all that lovely internal juice, they swell up and cause a nice blockage. Or six. The dog was fine after the surgery, the bank account not quite so much.

My Ddogs Labs of course opened the fridge and ate a whole squeezy bottle of ketchup. When I walked in it looked like there had been a murder!

We have also had sparkly and multicoloured poos from crayons and glitter.

As I write this they have just stolen apples off on the tree and are happily munching away.

This makes me giggle and feel the pain at the same time! Ours have eaten blocks of butter, trays of chocolates (diarrhoea for days), foil, plastic containers (judging from the sheer number eaten they must be a doggy delicacy), lovely fresh bread rolls that I had put aside especially for kids lunches, sausages, numerous homemade soft toys (kids were gutted), a toilet brush, the lamb for dinner, birthday cakes, perfectly prepared meringues and umpteen potplants. We have rushed seemingly on deaths door doggies to the vet only to have them bounce back and continue their life of crime! We have also had to throw out numeous pillows and doonas due to doggy vomit.

Our latest pup also loves pads, underwear and nappies. Bonus points if they are used. His party trick is taking a raw egg, cracking it beautifully down the middle, eating the contents while leaving the two eggshell halves perfectly intact. I have yet to work out how he does it.

I am weeping with laughing.... And it reminds me of a pathologically greedy lurcher we had years ago, who was crapping everywhere, bright orange shit. Wtf is up with the dog, we wondered, until we discovered that the new net of carrots was gone.... We couldn't keep a dishcloth or tea towel, they would all be eaten & she also ate a dustpan & brush, rubbish, socks, shoes, gloves, soft toys and assorted wildlife.
One day, her stomach was so distended that she was peeing & pooing where she stood. I rushed her outside & found she was limping. I couldn't think how she had hurt herself until later, when I went to serve the stew on the Raeburn. The gallon pot was completely empty. She had stood up with her paw burning on the hot plate until she had scoffed the stew...

My thread in classics?

These stories are fantastic.