Oh Christ I have done something incredibly stupid, please can I have some advice?

[CripplinglyStupid]

Cooking this evening. I am not a big cook. Made a delicious dinner, and then went to move the pot off the glass hob.

The cast iron casserole dish won't move. It appears to have welded to the glass. It overboiled a tiny bit when cooking and I thought nothing of it but now I cannot fucking get it off.

I live with flatmates in a rented house. A quick google warns me the glass will probably shatter if I just wrench it, not that I think I can anyway because it is stuck fast. A website recommended a long thin razor and some aerosol lubricant - which I do not have and can't easily get on a Sunday evening, but I have had a try with a sachet of sex lube and a fish slice.

Please help me! I absolutely cannot shatter the glass and the pot belongs to my flatmates so I can't just leave it there. We all use each other's things so she won't mind that I've used it, but I can see her becoming alarmed if I have to admit I can't get it off the glass. Pot cost nearly £90 and I do not want to have to replace it.

What should I do? What might work?

All I can add is that both cast iron and glass have very high melting points, so you can't possibly have melted one into the other . It's just burnt on food that is glueing them together and you will be able to soak that's off using the excellent ideas up thread .

< refuses to snigger at lubricated utensils >

I think Tom Jones should record 'Sex Lube' immediately.

Good point about the preppers hassled

After just reading the 'AIBU to make nanny and DC travel economy' can I just say how much more at home I feel on this thread?

Chchchchange : in a mumsnet related choking episode I believe sex lube and a fish slice could be of assistance. In fact I plan to make them part of my go-to zombie apocalypse kit.

Was just about holding it together until I read Badger's post. Now the baby is awake again from all the laughing.

Thank you, all! To answer questions -

It was a beef casserole.
Lube was tropical flavoured and the hob now smells pleasantly of pineapple, so nobody will ever guess it's actually lube.

'Sex lube' does sound a bit weird but I wanted to differentiate between, well, sex lube and the aforementioned aerosol lube, which I had no idea was WD40.

"HairySubject

I would worry about turning it back on with lube all over it, is it flammable?"

I think the lube will be just fine in a "turned on" situation.

Ah. Was just posting to suggest sex lube and a fish slice, but see you've already tried it.

I'm out.

I think that 'sex lube & fish slice' is going to become another in the list like 'naice ham', Pom bears etc.

Sex lube and a fishslice

Sex lube and fish slice = Genius

Off to find Badgers post

they hand out sex lube sachets at my local clinic. I had no idea they were for the kitchen.

I have no advice but you've cheered me up. And I'm sure I recognise you under that name change.

Meeep
Could you try to attack the burnt foodstuff somehow, maybe you could use a vibrator to break bits off?

how am I supposed to do my marking when I'm laughing so much?

Thanks for answering my question OP. Beef and pineapple are strange bedfellows indeed but then I'm trying and failing to find a sex lube flavour which does go.

Ale? Garlic? Red wine?

OddSocks I wonder if I am who you are thinking of!

I don't know, I may be well off

Sex lube and a fishslice

What about trying oven cleaner?

or drain cleaner? PLEASE check the instructions though as it might be a stupid or even dangerous suggestion. I think it got something in it that dissolves organic matter.

Whatever you use you could do a tiny test patch to check it doesn't mark the hob.

Red wine flavour lube

I can imagine this becoming a standard mn suggestion, like LTB.
OP: I'm having trouble with the washing machine. Help please.
All of MN: Have you tried sex lube and a fish slice?

sobs with laughter. After telling DH this, he suggests the OP changes her username to kinkyfish.

On the advice note, I have stuck pots to the hob before. Let everything cool down, then squirt detergent or cleaner (or vinegar) around it. Leave it to soak in and dissolve the food.m. I swear by Mr Muscle oven cleaner, bur the less noxious suggestions above will do the trick.

peppers one never knows how passion may take over when you're cooking on an induction hob. One moment you're cooking a spotted dick, the next minute you're using the good scissors to cut the lube packet.

Sex lube and a fish slice is amazing though.

Thank you OP, after a truly terrible day this has cheered us all up over here. The pineapple aroma around the oven has finished me

Just spat out some dinner laughing at Tom Jones recording Sex Lube!

Also you can get aerosol lube? Why on earth would you need such a thing. Can't think it would be any quicker than the squirty stuff.