Ridiculous things you've only recently realised you've been wrong about your entire life

[Seasidedolly]

I genuinely thought if you pulled the reverse cord on ceiling fans, it would circulate warm air.

My friend thought the yellow average speed cameras on motorways were there to look for missing children.

I had another recent revelation but I can't remember it now

What does a c-section have to do with a virgin birth? Surely it's just the absence of intercourse that counts?

Well I thought so too Number but someone else brought that up.

I didn't realise for years that rice puddings were actually factually made of rice.

I was also confused by wind in the willows and thought moles were the same size as badgers.

The c section question threw me slightly as you have so much stuff put up your vagina during IVF that surely a baby coming out of it wouldn't effect the 'virgin' status. Although tbf it's not something that's ever crossed my mind before.

I've never even heard of rooibos, let alone knowing how to pronounce it!

I buy it from a specialist tea merchants. It involves mumbling and pointing. How is it pronounced?

Wiki says it is pronounced royboss. I prefer rooiboos

South African here. Rooibos = Roy-bos (with a short o sound).

I have abysmal knowledge of UK geography and assumed Butlins, Centre Parcs etc were geographical locations/names of towns.

DD1 thought that those kebab meat racks were elephant legs She was 15 at the time!

She also (aged 17!) was surprised how quickly our baggage arrived when we got back to Heathrown from Florida. After some questioning it transpired that she didn't realise that they came on the plane... but thought they went on a long conveyor belt UNDER the sea !!!! Her logic was that they disappeared and reappeared on that conveyor belt :)

She's supposedly intelligent and now a doctor !!!!!

And I was convinced that Billericay was in Ireland. It SOUNDS Irish!

And I recently realised that Egypt is in Africa ... my geography sucks!

(I have just bought a HUGE world map to enjoy on my living room wall as a result!)

I didn't realise for years that rice puddings were actually factually made of rice

What did you think it was made of?

There is an actual Swiss Cottage in Swiss Cottage. I thought it was just a wanky tube station name! But no, I've seen it last week irl. next week I'm going to Cockfosters

Many tube stations on London have pub names.

I've just thought of two.

Until about 2 years ago I thought the Blackwall Tunnel was in the river, not under it. I imagined it to be like a water slide going through the Thames with divers swimming around it. I found out the truth when I asked dp how they stopped it getting hitting by boats and it was lucky that whale that came down the Thames didn't hit it! (Also I only realised it was under water at all about a year before that. I assumed it went over like a bridge but because it was covered over that's why it was called a tunnel... I didn't give it that much thought tbh.)

Those signs that say "Any veh". For a very long time, when I'd see one I'd read it and think that must mean " any way", maybe it's in German. It's how I imagined a German person would say "any way" in a German accent. I thought it might be a message for foreign drivers.

As you can probably tell, I don't drive!

That "any veh" might be/probably is a message for foreign drivers (most likely German, due to the accent) had me laughing so much I have real tears in my eyes!

Me too!

It's very fortunate there are few situations in life which require saying the words "lapis lazuli" out loud.

And even more fortunate that I never encountered one before I found out the correct pronunciation of "lazuli"

I recently found out that it's anchors aweigh not anchors away

I'm having great fun laughing at you all

I always thought Skegness was in Scotland.

(and the Bible is pretty much the only authority common to all Christians)

Er... different Christians have different Bibles - whole books are left out of or included in some, depending on the type of Christian you are.

I thought some folk were putting their initials on the back of their cars, turns out it's the country they are from!

Regarding the IVF/c section/virgin birth thing. A relative who is a minister once told me that some Christians believe that Jesus was not born in the normal way because exiting through the birth canal would have tainted him They don't have an explanation as to how he was born, just that it was a miracle and that it involved no contact with those shameful lady bits.

I also thought Welsh rare bit was a rabbit dish. I don't know why I even thought that. I just assumed.

Took me a very long time to work out why on ambulances the word is written backwards. I didn't like to ask anyone.

different Christians have different Bibles

I wouldn't quite put it like that although I do know that some denominations add books that are not accepted by others. However, my broad point was that the one thing that all denominations share is the Bible, with a large part of the text being common to all (with a variety of translations).

So, the test for me of any doctrine is not whether the Pope or my vicar or some great theologian says it's true, but whether it's in the Bible, although I might rely on those experts to help me interpret the Bible correctly.

Crying - actually crying - real tears.

Fwiw - I too thought that Gibraltar was an island I'm not actually convinced yet that it's not despite DH showing me on a map, that those lorries were called "arctic" because they were refrigerated and I will also admit that at one time (although I did learn this some years ago) I totally believed that the channel tunnel was like a massive pipeline lying on the bottom of the sea. (In my defence - know that there are massive oil & gas pipelines that are pretty much big enough to drive a car through (at least I think there are) that go on the seabed between countries so the idea of the channel tunnel being the same thing really didn't still doesn't seem that odd to me.)

I always knew were the Falklands were, but I totally thought that the Faroe Islands were part of Scotland until a few very short years ago. (despite having lived in Scotland for half my life and actually have friends from the Faroes.