To ask for your best examples of brass-neckedness to entertain us all on this dull day?

[Salmotrutta]

I've got one from decades ago.

My older brother was about 18 and going out with a girl of about 16.

It was pretty short lived as she seemed to be a bit spoiled etc. and they were only teens after all.

My brother was the one who ended it but girl seemed to think Mum was behind it.

Mum wasn't but she had asked to girl to help bring in washing during the rain when she stayed over at our house one weekend as mum was in the middle of something when rain started.

This was apparently a criminal act to ask someone for a bit of help so girlfriend moaned to brother (who I think had got rather exasperated by her anyway by this point) and he ended it.

Apparently this did not go down well.

Next thing, her little sister phoned my Mum and castigated her for being the cause of all this! Little sister would have been about 14 and mum would have been about 45!

That didn't go down well either.

A group of friends took it in turns to mind each others' pre-school kids while we all went to a yoga class

When it was friend X's turn, she said she couldn't do it that day.

I happened to see her before the class was due & she said that, as I was at home with my DS after all, could I look after her DD while she went to the class

(I did say no!)

Ooh ratbag you have reminded me, ex dp had taken kids into town really close to Christmas, only small, think 3 and 6, whilst out there was a sudden massive snow fall. Of course being Uk all public transport immediately ground to a halt.

After a few toe numbing hours they managed to make it to our nearest town, the local taxi firm had a wait of a few hours, dp decided to walk, he popped into the chinese and they offered to take him and the kids home along with the chinese.

Very heartwarming and kind, saved 2 freezing children a long walk, their poor toes really were blue.

Sorry for off topic, great thread .

I had a summer job away from home when I was seventeen. Friday lunchtime one of the bosses asked if I could look after her eight year old that afternoon. No problem - I had the evening off (waitress). So I fronted up at her house after the lunch shift was over (3pm), took the child to a prearranged swimming date, then kept her entertained and fed at her house until her older brother got home at 10 pm.

The next day the boss came up to me, thanked me for looking after the child and paid me.

£1.

Even 35 years ago I thought it was a little on the low side for seven hours of babysitting.

An evening meal was arranged at a local pub for MIL birthday, DH and BIL had said they would pay for her as it was her birthday, SIL overheard this and took it as them paying for the whole meal between them, but didn't tell us this until the end of the meal when she had ordered starters, mains and dessert for her, her other half and 3 kids, and she'd chucked in a few 'celebratory drinks' for MIL too, when the bill was asked for, it was then she decided to declare she had no money to her name, so DH and BIL ended up footing a £240 bill between them! Oh but her kind partner did scrape together the cash for his meal, as a gesture of goodwill!

I was heavily pregnant with my third son carrying a heavy pushchair with my 2 year old in it up the stairs to catch a train while keeping an eye on my 5yr old when a man comes running up the stairs saying excuse me! I thought how nice some help when he says "excuse me I want to get to the platform and your in the way!!" Needless to say he had to wait.

I have a few but I'll share one:
I broke up with someone and had gone round to collect the last of my things. whilst I was there somebody rang the doorbell. He panicked and pushed me into a room and shut the door. He then let in a girl and proceeded to start watching a film with her! I didn't know what the hell to do as the only way was out through that room, after about 25 mins I walked through the room quite calmly saying, " hello and goodbye, I will leave him to explain who I am!"

Great thread!
A friend of ours offered to nip round and feed the cat when we went away for the weekend. On the Saturday afternoon I texted to ask if the cat was OK. He replied with a photo message of the cat, sitting on his lap on our settee. Fair enough the cat was getting some attention but in the background I could see that the footie was on our TV and he had opened a beer out of our fridge. I'm sure he only offered because we had Sky!

I've remembered another one from the dim and distant past - about 20 years ago probably if that's relevant.

I had advertised an item for sale in the paper.

Man rings up and says he wants to come and view it. So far so good. He then proceeds to tell me he lives in the next town and doesn't drive so will get the bus, so it will take him a wee while to get here.
No problem thinks I, BUT, he then proceeds to ask me to phone the bus company, find out bus times then phone him back to let him know!!

I told him no.

DH and I rented a flat about 10 years ago. The area had very limited parking but it was a short term deal for us so we didn't mind. We had two cars at the time and parked one of them on the grass verge by the flat. After about a month of living there, someone knocks at the door and introduces himself as a neighbour. He said that he needed us to move the car we'd park on the grass verge, as someone had parked in his space (not us and he knew that) and so he wanted to park near the flats and suggested that we park 100 yards down the road!!

DH was just flabbergasted into silence. Neighbour got really agitated and accused DH of being uncooperative and a bad neighbour. Poor DH didn't say a damn thing back to him as he was so completely stunned.

There are many splendid tales about eBay, particularly if you're selling a vehicle. Apart from the clowns who want you to end early to avoid fees, there are those unfortunate souls who haven't quite grasped how a contract works.

This was an exchange with a pillock over one of my motorbikes: "I'll give you 500 for it". "No thanks, I'll see how the bidding goes". "It's a firm offer". "No thanks". "English law says you have to accept". "English law says no such thing". "I'll fucking sue you". "You will? You'll need to find out where I live first." And then it degenerated.

When I finally sold the bike, the buyer turned up in a car wearing a tshirt and suggested "borrowing" my jacket to ride home in. I suggested there was a dealership a mile away who'd be glad to kit him out. "Should get a nice all in one for under £300". He humped a bit and left. I've always wondered if he died of hypothermia...

Being quite poor we were really grateful when BIL offered to lend us his large house in DH's country for a holiday, this was the home in which DH was brought up but it has been "sold" to BIL for a nominal amount to avoid death taxes.

At that time the grounds were open to the public in summer for which a fee was charged - a couple of locals were employed to sell the tickets etc. When we got there we found a basket with tickets and a float and a note informing us that we were in charge of running it for a week as the local people weren't working. DH was also "invited" to do some gardening.

I was fucking furious that our "holiday" was basically unpaid labour running a tourist attraction. We did have a couple of days when we just locked the gates and went out but DH was too pathetic to do it more. I also helped myself to some if the takings as "wages". Apparently BIL thought it was a privilege for us to stay there and not go out while he went with his family to their holiday home in another part of the country.

At uni you had to show a photocard/mealticket to claim an evening meal. The cards were all kept on in a rack on the wall by the entrance to the canteen so you just picked yours up as you went in (slightly mad system, 25 years ago!)

DBf dumped me for OW from a different college. Had horrible few days weeping etc in my room, then the first time I braved the canteen for dinner I discovered he had not only taken OW in for dinner but used my ticket to get a meal for her (we looked quite similar.) So I was heartbroken, hungry and humiliated...!

.

Was (poss still am) second emergency contact for friends child. One day she is sick at school so I go pick her up and bring her home with my 2 younger children, phone friend, no answer, phone mutual friends and find out she's gone away for a long weekend. When I take her to collect my oldest son, her Mum (1st emergency contact) turns up non the wiser (hadn't heard phone or something) and takes her. All fine but when I see 'friend' she doesn't even say thank you!
Looked after friends sons after school one day a week/once a month for 18 months, on a babysitting swap basis, she had mine about 4 times. Still waiting for the rest.
I'm no longer a sap!

Am just amazed at some people but made me remember one from DS's 6th birthday. It was in a sports hall and I'd said that people could drop off and leave but if they wanted younger siblings to play (we had room) they would need to stay. Classmate of DS turns up with his parents and younger sibling of about 3. We're busy greeting people and I look round and they are heading out the door having left BOTH kids with a virtual stranger in a strange place!!

I had to ask his older brother what his little brothers name was...he seemed quite happy though. Maybe they had a lot of brass neck and did it a lot.

Still only got about a quarter of the way down, but I can't believe some of these stories... and believe even less that anyone would ALLOW this shit to happen to them.

Good friend of mine, while I was undergoing fertility treatment, phoned me and asked me to take her 2 (easily conceived, 10 months between them) children, for a weekend. As apparently "you need the practice as I am sure you will conceive soon". I was on my 2nd round of IVF after 2 years of other fertility treatments and 2 miscarriages. Yeah I was just dying to get some practice.

Other friend, when we go away on weekends to hotels (maybe about once a year), wraps up danishes, croissants etc and brings them home as gifts for her children. She also takes the little portions of jam, butter, honey etc as "they are very handy".

My mum came to stay for a week when DD was 5 wks old. I was exhausted due to lack of sleep, plus DD had awful reflux. DH was floored by severe bronchitis at the same time, so I was looking forward to mum being around. I naively thought she would give me a bit of a hand. Not anything major; just hold the baby so I could have a shower. I wasn't expecting to be waited on.

Oh no. Turned out she was the one who expected to be waited on. She wouldn't even make herself a cup of tea "because she was on her holidays". Grrr...

I was on free school meals....those of us who were had to go and collect our token from the school office each day - so everyone knew we were on FSM not that I cared.....annnnywhooo....you were allowed to spend up to 50p - and a friend would stand behind me like a hawk each day in the dinner queue and if I didnt spend up to the full value would shove something of hers on to my tray to tap into my FSM benefit!!

My mother died very suddenly and painfully from ovarian cancer at 62. At her wake my aunt (Mums older sister) siddled up to my grieving sister at the open coffin and said "When I die make sure you look after x" (her daughter/our cousin) - the lid was not yet on our Mothers coffin when my aunt was thinking about herself and her daughter....

I moved back to my childhood town shortly before having DS1. Only one of my old friends had children so naturally we started to hang out. When she started working her mum was paid to do the childcare alongside her part time job. Quite often, as I was SAHM, I would take her 2 DDs if there was a shortfall (unpaid and never reciprocated). One day, she phoned to ask if I could have her DDs- I agreed and she said her mum would drop them off. When they were dropped off, my friend's mum thanked me for stepping in last minute when the girls were so poorly because she had called in sick at her job too many times in the last few months and her boss had the hump. The DDs spent their time spluttering with temperatures on the sofas. I had 3 perfectly healthy DSs (under 5) until they came round. What made it ok to dump them on a young family just because she didn't want to get sick?!!
The friend in question would quite often phone to see what we were up to and did we want to meet up, but towards the end of our friendship, mostly it was a precursor to 'oh, not much? Can I drop the girls round then?'
The DH of the friend also jumped on board the pisstake wagon when he was late picking up his DDs saying 'seeing as you had them, I decided to stay late at work and put in some overtime.' It was past our own DSs bedtime and we had already picked them up from school and fed them tea.
Nowadays I don't hear from her much- except for the school holidays because I am a teacher and she thinks I can have her Dd all holiday!

The night before my wedding i was staying at my parents house and I had a few girlfriends round. One of dh friends (male) was bored in his b&b so decided to come round... And stayed! Even when all my friends went he still stayed. Not sure what happened in the end as he was still sitting in my parents lounge when I went off to bed. Only my dh knew him, my parents had never met him before.

Great thread.

Mine is my wanker ex. There could actually be many, many examples of brass neck, including the time his car broke down so he simply took mine and left me wandering around a town I didn't know for the whole day, so he could go to work (instead of, you know, letting me drop him off and pick him up ...). But the best one was when we split up. Unbeknown to me, he'd already started a relationship with someone else, so was a bit skittish. My parents invited me to come join them on holiday to get over the break up, and I was in Wales. We'd agreed I'd come back on the Monday so we could clean the house together prior to giving the keys back to the letting agent on Tuesday.

On Sunday, he rang to say he was struggling horribly and needed me to come back right now. Like an idiot, I drove back (and it was about 250 miles so not a short drive). He met me at the door saying he'd changed his mind and was too emotionally affected to stay while I cleaned up, so he was going to drive down to his parents and would return on Tuesday to sort out the key-return. And he left.

I went into the house to discover it was a shit tip, he'd not washed up a single thing in the week he'd been alone and the sink was piled with it, etc. I ended up sobbing down the phone to my mum, then I had to get on with it as I needed my deposit back (I'd paid it, and I had to prove I had funds in my account to cover the MA course I was starting, and he knew this).

Never got the deposit money. Nearly lost my MA place because he refused to talk to me about the money he owed me.

I found out two years later - from the lettings agency, who deserve a medal - that he'd given them his address/name to return the deposit cheque to, and they'd been insisting they couldn't make it payable to anyone but the person who paid it in.

What a complete wanker.

Mine is my wanker ex too

We broke up at new year but he hung around for a few months as he had no deposit for a flat & I needed the money he (occasionally forgot) to hand in while still living together. In the end, I couldn't take much more of him so suggested that he keep that month's money & use it for a flat deposit, and I'd just keep the PC he bought 2 years before we split up.

Anyhoo, he moved out & initially I let him keep my spare key in case I lost mine, on the understanding he didn't use it any other time (daft of me I know). Everything went smoothly until about a month after he had officially moved out, I took an afternoon off work and caught him in my flat, using the PC I now owned to download porn & burn it onto discs. He was using my PC, electricity, internet & food god knows how often until I caught him out. Suffice to say I took the key off him that day. The worse bit was the crap he downloaded fucked up my PC & I never got the benefit of it much beyond that day.

I have a few...

MIL (who lives abroad) took out a large financial loan - and used our address for it! Not only did she not ask us first, she denied it when we questioned her! When she stopped paying the loan back, we were threatened with the bailiffs and were bombarded with phone calls from the loan company!

In the local leisure centre swimming pool's communal showers on a very quiet day, I was the only person having a shower. Two women, on finishing their swim, chatting away to each other, stopped by my towel (right next to me) and dried their hands on it!! I had shampoo in my hair (and eyes) at that moment and, to be honest, I was so shocked I didn't say anything at the time! When I saw them a bit later whilst I was drying my hair, I mentioned they should use their own bloody towels! Their reply? "Oh, really, some people"!!!!

And...a well off neighbour took their children to Disney (Florida) for two weeks and asked if I'd look after their 3 cats in their own home. Not a problem. Was a bit when they said they wanted them fed in the morning and the evening but, still, I'd already said I'd do it. On top of feeding the felines I had to clear up dead/dying mice and other creatures they'd brought in (including the mouse livers!) every day and mop the floor with disinfectant! On their return, as a 'thank you', I got a some chocolates from them. Happened to see said chocs later in Lidl - for £0.75p!!