To be miffed at "Gift list for mother of the baby" enclosed in *Baby naming ceremony* invitation?

[doubleshotespresso]

So some close friends (who married in church), but now claim to be atheist are holding a naming ceremony for their 8 month old first baby in an hotel.....

The invitation is beautiful with a map, timings "event closes at 11pm"?

The gift list ranges from £30-to £300, all items for the mother, cosmetics, trinkets, jewellery, pampering breaks, personalised hand-bound stationery and photo albums...

Anybody know the drill for these naming ceremonies? Are we supposed to guess a gift for the baby? Or just congratulate the mother for deciding on a name?

I have read this a dozen times and am staggered beyond belief-DP read it and fell into hysterics....

My gut tells me to go along with Jo Malone scented nappies or something.

Somebody please tell me this is not normal?!?!?!

Have lurked reading this, but this latest twist?!? Doubleshot, you should be applying as a UN ambassador if you manage to keep the peace through this! I wish all the luck going... Sister is clearly batshit crazy, and totally self centred to boot. Although, a tiny shred of sympathy - she must genuinely think she was doing a really nice thing for her sister and having it all cast aside like that... If she actually can't see why the original plans were so (OMG, so so so so) inappropriate, then I can see why she is annoyed.

Doesn't excuse it at all though, she must be beyond lunatic to think it was appropriate...

So anyway back to reality for now: am collecting DSD from netball match. Then home to do usual homework/dinner/chores/ stuff.

Will talk to friends DH later and decide what to do if anything then....
"Piss off and get over yourself" may be a popular suggestion thanks for that!

i would also pass this on to your friend/her parents

this is family business now - sis will not hesitate to make you the bad guy if given the chance - you need to step back IMHO ( and frankly your friend's DM needs to have a stern word with her dd)

I need you to let her know so we can iron out things before I arrive
really need you to move on this for me please
it is imperative you let friend know
if you could get friend to call him with a full apology
you will understand that this needs addressing quickly

Did you know you were her personal assistant now? Obviously you missed that email.

I just can't imagine trying to get a non-family member to mediate for me with my own sister. Bizarre.

She's trying to put all the onus on you to sort out the mess she made (and still hasn't given up the hope of garnering a lot of lovely gift list loot, clearly). Don't play.

Me me me me my my my my I I I I - blimey.

at "first aunt".

really need you to move on this for me please

...it is imperative you let friend know

I need you to let her know Are you her PA now?

I am not used to this treatment Sounds like she needs more of it!

Oh, forward it to your friends's mother and/or DH. Her mother is probably the best bet, as then she can deal with her totally obnoxious other daughter.

I agree with Ice - the only people that can tell the sister that she is being totally U are her parents now. If you respond she can too easily pass off what you say as it being done differently in their family so you couldn't possibly understand. I think you also risk being made the bad guy if there's bad blood between the sisters afterwards.

It's so tempting to fire off an email telling her to fuck off to the far side of fuck though.

"please let her know I am hurting and an apology is what will help me further along in this process"

Unbelievable. Just...wow.

Sauvignon-great minds think alike!

Wow, just wow. Send to friends DH and her parents. Just unbelievable.

I bet the sister bullied your friend throughout their childhoods. She sounds... Self-involved (to put it nicely).

really need you to move on this for me please

I love that bit

Another one blubbing here! Huge congratulations to you and your lovely fiancé! Xxx

It would be best if I could gain some balance on this all soon
Reply:
Dear Friend's Sis,
Sorry to hear that you are unbalanced. Best wishes for your speedy recovery.

Wow, I think my earlier suggestion is insufficient.

She is absolutely

loop.

the.

loop.

You'll do the right thing, you have impeccable judgement. Best of luck.

It is not too late to make the appropriate return to the plans already agreed and discussed. Fortunately I am able to make this happen.

What. The actual. Fuck?

But up until then I had tears running down my cheeks was quite moved reading about your DSC's GPs. They sound lovely. Not quite as wonderful as you of course double bit still, nice people

The phrase 'More front than Blackpool' springs to mind.

Doubleshot, how are you resisting the urge to ring her up (or email her) and give her a large, detailed and unequivocal piece of your mind?

You see I don't think the'P* off' message will work at all - she strikes me as so spectacularly self interested she just won't understand why you aren't as mystified as her at the discarding of her ideas... You may need to answer each paragraph plainly & clearly, and cc it to Friend's DH , asking her not to contact you again as it is, after all, "a family affair".
Blooming' heck, she takes all the biscuits, doesn't she?!!

My gut is still telling me that silence would be the best and most effective option ..... I will speak to DP then friends DH later though and take things from there... Am very hopeful /will suggest friends DH perhaps communicates with her.

My friend does not need this and will be really so upset so she will be the focal point of any decision made I am sure. She has done so well in the last week and seems to be looking much more her old self so I do not think this is the time for her to read the message.

Her Mum however, will I am sure be keen to see it and act accordingly. She is a lovely, level-headed lady and has been horrified by friends sister this far, so this will certainly not read well to her.... But I think if I know friends DH, he will want to deal with the sister before their mother does....

Will let you all know.....

Netball appears to be over-running...... but will update here later..... Thanks all for your wonderfully entertaining messages , have calmed down now, but it was so helpful to get reassurance from all of you that this woman is utterly bonkers....

Ohhhh I have just read a few pages back ..... I guess my DP should now be my DF??? Oooeerrr....

You should go with your gut, it's served you well so far.

Double this thread is at 920 posts already, please oh please, post a link to a new one if you think we'll run out of space.
I'm sure there are lots of us that want to hear how this turns out and will cry if we lost the next part of the story.

From my point of view, I think crazy sister's Mum should let loose. If your friend's DH gets to her, she'll think "outsiders" like friend's DH and you are influencing your friend. She might have to take a bit more notice if it's her Mum?

And YY to your DP officially (in MN land anyway!) becoming your DF

DF indeed! . . .

And yes, she is one of the most selfish people I have ever hear of.

Takingthestairs is there are thread limit on the number of posts then? Am not sure what you mean? Apologies if I am being daft here.....