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Have you ever encountered anyone this cheeky?

780 replies

TastesLikePanda · 18/04/2013 17:30

Inspired roughly by a couple of threads recently...
I used to have a friend (used to being the operative) who would come round to my house to smoke. Her reason being that she didn't want her house to smell like smoke and she didn't like smoking in the street as she thought it looked 'common' (her words)

The punchline being that I didn't smoke
That friendship ended when I saw the light and realised that she was using me! She was happy enough to make my house stink and I was too polite (at the time) to ask her not to as I thought I was being a welcoming host.

Has anyone encountered anyone with more brass neck than that?

OP posts:
GoSuckEggs · 23/04/2013 11:25

These people are crazy!!!

cocolepew · 23/04/2013 11:56

Best thread ever, I'm still gobsmacked by the audacity of people!

Blu · 23/04/2013 12:05

I turned up at a friend's house once to spend the evening with her - she had, admittedly, suffered some very bad trouble, and i was going round to keep her company / drown her sorrows / offer shoulder to cry on. When I arrived she said 'oh, so and so invited me out on a date so I thought that as you were coming here anyway you could babysit' - and off she waltzed!!

I have a friend who let a mate stay in her flat while she went on holiday. When she got home he had decided she should move and had put her flat up on a council flat swap website, and was showing someone round!!

MrsBodger · 23/04/2013 12:20

Fab thread. I've wasted the entire morning.

My small contribution. Ahem.

My lovely old school friend and her also lovely husband have 2 small (at the time) children. Both work full time, so had a nanny. Being lovely, when the nanny's mother was very ill, they of course let her have all the time off she needed, no problem.

Then, she told them she needed to take the next week off to have an operation. She didn't tell them what the op was for, and they, being lovely, didn't ask, just felt sorry for her, rearranged their schedules (again), took holiday to look after the children (again) etc. Nanny comes back after her op with . . . massive boobs. She said she didn't think they'd notice.

TheOneWithTheHair · 23/04/2013 12:39

I've remembered one.

Our first house was tiny but dh and I love entertaining. We had a small garden but it did ok for bbqs. One day we were having friends round. About 6/8 adults plus their dcs. A couple who have a lovely ds the same age as my ds1 were coming but rang up an hour before to say they'd forgotten they'd made plans with some other friends and would we mind if they all came along.

Our general hosting of bbqs is that we will do the food but it was a byo alcohol thing. We said of course it's fine and don't worry etc, bring them along.

They turned up with 13 extra adults and 6 extra dcs. They brought 6 beers with them and as a tub of coleslaw as a contribution.

TheOneWithTheHair · 23/04/2013 12:40

*and a tub

ilovexmastime · 23/04/2013 12:46

Loving this!

My DH has quite a few cheeky fucker friends, but this story is my favourite because it combines two of his friends being cheapskates in one story.

We were invited to DH's friend's wedding a few years ago. DH and x had been friends for years but I'd only met x's girlfriend twice, and not been impressed either time (they'd come round one afternoon and despite me trying to be friendly, offering her a drink etc, she had curled up on the sofa (feet up for those who care!) and gone to sleep for the afternoon while x and my DH watched the rugby).
Anyway, DH told me that the wedding reception was going to be at our local curry house and I was a bit Hmm but then thought, well it's their wedding so they can do what they like, and DH told me that it was going to be great, that they'd arranged a banquet, including freshly caught curried fish.
So the wedding went ok and we were sat at a table with another of DH's friends at the reception, and I liked the wife so that was good. These friends left fairly early to get back for the babysitter, and then when we went to leave we discovered:

  1. We had to pay for our meal and drinks
  2. DH's friends had left without paying for their drinks (and they were hammered) and because we were sat on their table we had to pay for their drinks (or cause a fuss, which DH refused to do)
This was not an accident by the way, they'd done it on purpose (there are plenty more stories of this particular friend's stinginess).

This was bad enough, but I was 8 months pregnant and had only had one soft drink and DH had only had 4-5 beers - the amount we had to pay for, if he had have drunk them he'd have been hospitalised!
Plus, we had given the happy couple money as a present and we never got a thank you - in person or by card - in fact, what cheesed me off the most was that the wedding couple didn't even acknowledge we were there. Most brides/grooms tend to go round and thank people for coming to their wedding and try to have a brief chat with their guests, but we were just ignored!

and breath...

sherbetpips · 23/04/2013 12:46

my SIL used to constantly drop her DS off at ours stating - just popping to the shops with my mum it will be good for our DS's to play together. Woudn't even ring beforehand. Would then go shopping for the whole day and ask - did you feed him when she returned, adding such comments as - didnt save any for us then.
Have put a stop to that.

expatinscotland · 23/04/2013 12:46

My cousin's ex wife tried to pull a cheeky stunt when his sister got married. His sister was the only girl and their dad was giving her a big, Mexican wedding - wedding Mass in the late afternoon on a Saturday, followed immediately by sit-down meal reception and mariachi band/band dancing and open bar.

Invitations were sent out with postage-stamped RSVP cards. His ex wrote +18 on theirs.

My aunt rang her up, what is this? She wanted to bring her family along because they needed a good night out. Shock

Auntie set her straight and also informed her that if she brought along extras they would be shown the door.

ilovexmastime · 23/04/2013 12:48

oh, and I forgot to say that the 'banquet' was hardly enough food per person for a 5 year old. If we'd just ordered off the normal menu it would have cost a quarter of the price and been 4 times as much food!

MeNeedShoes · 23/04/2013 12:55

FFS, who are all these cunty people???

Mexican house thief is the king of course but he's so mad it's funny. I can't help getting angry at the more everyday acts of unreasonableness!

sherbetpips · 23/04/2013 12:57

Love the client from hell link - I deal with this daily and am in the middle of just such a project!

AaDB · 23/04/2013 12:59

Bibi I would love to prepare a 'likelihood that AaDB will stay late on Friday AGAIN instead of going for a cocktail' piechart.

Sunny - my OH will love those.

ProbablyJustGas · 23/04/2013 13:19

I have a friend who had a few tough years finding a stable job teaching. About a year or two ago, she threw in the towel scrounging for a position at home and moved abroad to teach at an international school in Europe. During her spring break, she told me she was back in the city, and would DH and I like to have her for a couple of nights? Of course. Would be great to catch up. No problem.

When we picked her up that night, she informed us she hated the school she was working in, had quit her job with no notice period (basically gone on vacation and not gone back), abandoned her apartment, and all of her worldly things were now in a suitcase while she was waiting for a new teaching contract in Asia to come through. While this was a bit startling, we didn't think much of it and brought her home for a two-night visit.

After she set up in our spare room and we'd had a few glasses of wine catching up, my friend informed us that the accommodation she'd arranged with another friend had fallen through, she had no place to stay for three weeks, could she please stay at our "lovely" place with its convenient spare room, and no, the Asian job had not yet actually sent a contract through. But she was sure she would be moving to Asia in "only" three weeks. Oh, and she had very little money left in her account, having quit her job and all that, so she couldn't afford to stay in a nice hotel. We told her we couldn't put her up, so she made a big show of visiting a few much cheaper hostels in the area and said to us, "No, they won't do." DH and I still told her we couldn't put her up, so she flounced off to another city.

Months later, we tried to bury the hatchet and she apologized to me. And then a couple months after that, she had a bad day at work and wrote a long email to me about how cold I had been, and how her real friends had nothing but sympathy for her because, after all, she had been homeless :( .

Hall of fame worthy? Grin

expatinscotland · 23/04/2013 13:26

Bravo for not putting up with her pisstaking, Probably :).

kerala · 23/04/2013 14:05

Wow these are jaw dropping! My chores are piling up because I cant stop reading! Sadly dont really have any tales but have thrown people out of my house before and can recommend it as being great fun and empowering.

I host foreign students, paying guests, who are mostly Italian and Spanish teenage girls studying at local language schools. Most are absolutely fine and pleasant. One set of 3 looked like trouble from the off and asked if they could smoke in the house to which they were told of course not Hmm. Next day they left for school sure enough their room was a fug of fag smoke. I called their teachers and told them to come back, pack their things and leave. The girls were gobsmacked - I dont think any adult had ever followed through before. I was perfectly pleasant and calm but it was so empowering saying you lied to me, disobeyed me in my own home off you go! They were billeted to a crap house way out of town, they trailed off looking very hard done by ha ha ha their weeks holiday pretty much spoilt by their own entitled behaviour.

EccentricElastic · 23/04/2013 14:16

Kerala Love it!

Portofino · 23/04/2013 14:59

Nothing on the scale of some of these horrors! One day DH and I found ourselves childfree for the day so I posted on FB that we were popping out for a long, leisurely lunch and a wander round the shops to take advantage of the peace and quiet.

5 minutes later, a friend calls to say she saw we were going out for the day and as we were unencumbered with child could we take her's out with us instead as he was driving her mad. Hmm Yeah right.

kerala · 23/04/2013 15:25

Oh remembered my worst. Lived with a flatmate in my early twenties just the two of us. We were great pals and had fun being single girls about town. I was in my first job, trainee solicitor small firm, earning barely enough to pay the rent/buy food but was very proud that I was getting by.

Flatmate gets swept off her feet by older guy at work. He worked in iT at her law firm, so decent salary must have been mid thirties, drove a RED BMW etc. His tenancy ended so he moved in. And paid NOTHING towards rent or bills. So basically I was subbing him big time he was a big earner and I wasn't. To make it worse they would snog and grope each other on the sofa leaving me feeling as if I shouldn't be there. I ended up working late and taking up lots of new sports. He cooked dinner for me once, which they both made a huge fuss of. It was awful I felt really on the back foot. It only really occurred to me when my mum said at least having him around meant I paid less rent, and I wasn't I was just being royally shafted!

Eventually they moved out and we became no longer friends. They actually got married in haste and I wasn't even asked to the wedding or hen night (didn't care but still interesting that I had been cast as a villain somehow when actually I had been a doormat, he lived with us for months). Hilariously I bumped into her in the middle of India whilst on holiday with DH she was with a different husband Hmm. She was weird and despicable and hope she reads this and identifies herself! Bumping into her was so awkward all my anger flooded back she was being all friendly and I wasn't even polite (I am normally very friendly socially conscious etc). I was sunbathing by the pool the next day and she came out, saw I was there and scuttled back into their room Grin.

kerala · 23/04/2013 15:26

Oh and something else. She applied for a job at the firm I was working at. My boss showed me her CV. SHE HAD COPIED MY INTERESTS! She had no hobbies except shagging married men whilst I played sports/involved in trade committee etc. She had lifted all my interests into her CV.

Fluffycloudland77 · 23/04/2013 16:14

One of my in-laws used to get me to go around to her house to do her feet (I'm a podiatrist) and never do anything for dh and I.

I wouldn't hear from her unless she wanted free treatment.

One day, before a big family event I did her feet and cut her. I swear on my life it was accidental but she never asked me back.

I deflect piss takers now with a £30 treatment fee and 45p a mile mileage charge.

I still do pil for free.

MexicanHouseThief · 23/04/2013 17:51

My best friend was once charged £10 for a lift back from a wedding. Not so cheeky, you might think, except:

the driver was her sister
sis was driving past her house anyway

BalloonSlayer · 23/04/2013 18:05

flossieraptor I actually think your story has made me feel the most sad and angry of all these I have read on here. The utter cow!

NatashaBee · 23/04/2013 18:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Deathwatchbeetle · 23/04/2013 19:01

Ihearsounds -You forgot asking if someone could babysit your lovely children then p*ss off with a blike, get drunk, wander back the next morning!!