what the most hilarious and groundless parental complaint you've ever fielded?

[HanneHolm]

I have heard of one parent complaining a member of staff wasn't singing in a parents assembly.

The parent that wrote comments in their child's exercise book about my marking. We had a long discussion about complementary vs complimentary at parents' evening. They could not got their head around the fact that two goods that go together are known as complementary not complimentary goods.

That or the one who complained about their child's coursework mark (an 'E'). On further investigation the parent had done the coursework for the child and did not like their grade .

'That or the one who complained about their child's coursework mark (an 'E'). On further investigation the parent had done the coursework for the child and did not like their grade'

Lady- consider the practicality of it at a secondary school. His classroom is on the third floor, he has five seperate lessons a day, if he started each one running around the playground, could you imagine the time it would take to facilitate that?!

Once children are at secondary school, they need to be able to sit and focus and work. He had no SEN. He was just fidgety. He had a twenty minute break and an hour lunch to expel any excess energy. I think the request was absurd.

Plus- the lesson he was in was very active and engaging- lots of movement in class, active learning, range of stimuli- not as if he was being asked to sit in a chair and not move!

I agree, it does sound impractical. But I wonder how much time teachers waste trying to get children like this to sit and listen.

Our school system isn't set up to deal with lively children.

But for how long do you think we should make provision for these lively characters - surely at some stage we need to equip them with the skills they need to sit and concentrate for a reasonable length of time?

Or perhaps a run around the block should be written into their job contracts later in life?

Perhaps cinema screenings or theatre productions should have obligatory breaks every 40 minutes or so for restless types who have never learned this skill?

A landing on every flight every 45 minutes to break up the journey?

Lady, I taught him later on in his school career- he got there in the end. I waste no time on children like that- ignore their bad behaviour, reward their good behaviour, focus on the the learning.

He may have missed out on optimising his learning experience by not giving it his full attention, indeed, he may have found that he would have enjoyed it more if he fully engaged, but his mother's attitude (and it was a shame, as I really liked her!) facilitated his inattention and belief he didn't have to pay attention.

PE teachers loved him though ;)

Glad to hear he turned out ok

I live opposite a technical school, for children aged 11-18. They have a huge grounds. They do some academic learning. They spend much of their time outside - running, basket ball. They work in the gardens, digging up the earth, chopping down the trees, sawing the timber. I know, because I can see them out of my window. In fact I can see them now, digging in the rain. They learn technical skills such as elctronics and plumbing. Our electrician went to the school.

I think that this sort of education should be an option for all those children who are unlikley to want to spend their lives working in an office.

Anyway, sorry for the hijack, it's been an interesting discussion!

the kid who needs a run around, surely he could go for a run before school? or even, shock horror, walk to school himself instead of being driven?

I used to work with a bloke who had to go for a 20-30 mile early morning run before coming into the office, otherwise he was unbearable - perhaps a suggestion for twitchy pupils (he used to get up at 5am & run even on business trips).

Flogship - she wanted me to smell the jumpers not the children! She complained about me not being able to find it when I should be able to smell it! Sadly, by the end of the year I could tell it by the smell!

The parent who asked that A didn't sit anywhere near his cousin B in the same year because centuaries ago the famillies fell out about some farm land

The bus taking children on a school trip was 2mph over the speed limit - parent was following in their car.

That the school didn't inform her which day Hallowe'en was so she didn't know when to put the costume on. Hmmmm... The 31st of October, maybe.

Sports Day was abandoned half way through when it started snowing (end of May - we're in Scotland) so was rescheduled but we couldn't get the playing fields (shared with the secondary). So, we decided to use the playground.

Letter from father. His DD was not to take part in case she fell. If she did, he would sue us for her future earnings as she is a rising tennis star. She's 6.

What does he think she does at every playtime?!?

Not a complaint but an absence excuse. A year 11 pupil rode his motorbike (moped) into school, but on an icy day his mum rang the school to inform us that he wouldn't be coming in as it was too dangerous for the bike and "he doesn't do the bus"!

Parent came with apparent video evidence showing that her child won the egg and spoon race. It didn't. The mums at the finish line got it right.
I set reading homework for Wednesday as due to long weekend we were off on the Monday and Tuesday. Parent complained that they couldn't go back in time to do homework for the day before. I had to point out that there would in fact be another Wednesday next week.

Child didn't feel like coming to his violin lesson at school. Explained would need to come because no message from parents to say otherwise. Came along happily enough. Later that day - email from dad to my line manager saying I'd kidnapped his son and "forcibly held him against his will" thereby causing him psychological damage.

A dad of a reception child told us to keep another child away from his PFB otherwise he would go to the police. A week later the other child apparently jostled PFB whilst lining up and the dad said it was unacceptable and he was going to go to the local paper about it.

Thought of another one, parent complained I had been seen in Burger King on a Saturday lunchtime as this went against healthy eating policy.
She would have had more to complain about had she seen me at my friend's hen party the night before!

Actually, I might win the 'role model' award.

I was at a music festival. Bumped into mother of lad I teach being copiously sick in loo. Was quite pissed myself, but not to the point of up-chuck.

I asked if she was OK, passed her a paper towel, commiserated re: pukey dribble on her top. All perfectly amicable. Then I headed back into main venue, cannoning off three walls no doubt in order to do so.

Forgot all about it, until several weeks later when the Deputy Head had a quiet word with me - he also teaches the ds & had had to ring parents about his recent poor exam result. He suggested the boy hadn't done much revision over recent half term holiday.

Parents cheerfully agreed this was probably the case. However, they explained that they had left him unattended whilst they went off to a festival for three days - 'mind you, we all need to let our hair down, & it was half term...if his English teacher's out getting pissed, ha ha, we can't exactly blame our Ben for not working all holiday!'

The festival in question is over a hundred miles away from our home town...

I'm taking notes here! This thread is really funny. Classics, please!

I love the one about videoing the finish at the sports day - how mad/stupid/deluded is that?!

My dad has kept some of the letters he had from parents over the years. One of which was explaining that their child hadn't been in the previous day as he was suffering from bumbago.

Can I add one from the other side. When my Precious was in Reception, they had to wear shirts, ties and blazers.
One very hot day the teacher on morning gate duty was in shorts and a sleeveless top and sandals.

I marched into the Head Teacher's office and lodged and 'official' complaint. I actually missed my train to make the complaint.

I still blush when I think of it. I hope the staff all mocked me in the staffroom.