what is the oddest thing someone has done when you have visited their house?

[2shoeskickedtheeasterbunny]

mine was my DB, he did warn me but tbh I was so...... [bushock]
I was kind of 'oh ok"
he put old sheets on the floor to protect his carpet from...

dd's wheelchair wheels

guess where we won't be going again(this was after he insisted she was shoved in the corner of the table at a pub...just in case she got in the staff's way....WTF)

??? YOUR please

I have just read this from start to finish and I can't believe I've come to the end :( ok il add my contribution

We were invited to friends and his gf house for lunch, they didn't ask us to bring anything but we thought we would bring some cupcakes I made. We arrived on time at their house and knocked on the door. The curtains twitched upstairs but no answer, we knocked again, still no reply. We rang friend and he told us he was at the supermarket and would be 10 mins, we asked where his gf was and he hung up knewfullwellshewasupstairsnotanswering--

20 mins later friend turns up with one small bag, he greets us and 3 dcs then invites us in. Gf is nowhere to be seen and he leaves is in living room for half hour while he prepares 'lunch' we are then invited into the kitchen where there is a plate of cheese sandwiches and some crisps in a cereal bowl for 7 of us! He then goes to find gf upstairs toldyou
He comes down no gf and the kids have cleared the plates he left out. He grumbles about all the food going then goes to sit in the living room to read his newspaper!!
We stay a further 5 mins then the gf comes down and asks us to leave as she feels unwell and is upset as the dcs have eaten her out of house and home! We left, took out cupcakes and havnt been back since.

Another time another friend invited us for the weekend. We drove the 2 hour drive and turned up hungry and hot to discover them in the garden. We sat for an hour with them drinking lemonade without offering us anything. I eventually said '' can I get a glass of water?' Female friend said 'of course but not out of the fridge please get tap water, the dog has a sensitive stomach today and the bottled water is his!' This afternoon was followed by a chip shop tea, male friend 'forgot' wallet so we paid, then an evening of watching very long DVD of their wedding (which we attended) then we slept on the sofa withdogwithshits--

Didn't happen to me, but worth repeating.
Friend (age 11) invites classmate over to her house after school. Friend's mother offers classmate a cup of tea. Classmate says "No!"
The next day afternoon the mother of another classmate calls Friend's mother and says "I heard X was offered tea at your house. Please do not offer my daughter tea if she ever goes to your house."
This wasn't in the UK, but still WTF?

This thread is priceless and I have very dull family and friends..
Except friend's OH who hovers over us while we eat, often whisks away our plates before we've finished and has been known to mop the patio, after we'd eaten outside (while we were all sitting there). At least friend has the grace to look mortified at his behaviours

I had to register and add mine!

I invited an old friend and her DP to my new house for a meal out and a few glasses of wine. They were from down South and it turned out that her DP's brother owned a business locally to us and it was suggested we all go and enjoy the afternoon there prior to our meal.

They arrived hours late and we ended up sitting at this business from 3pm until 11pm, buying overpriced wine and getting drunker and drunker waiting for a free go of the facility the business offered (don't want to give too much away) and being assured that it would be "in the next twenty minutes" for hours. All the while friends DP was busy socialising with family and friends he hadn't seen in ages and my ex DH having to push our meal back half an hour a time until he just gave up.

We finally get a go on the facility and it's the last half hour of the evening with 8 players. I'm already wasted cos I've consumed about three bottles of wine and had nothing to eat. Finally we leave and we manage to convince a local takeaway to stay open for us to eat. As soon as they have eaten the flounce to bed and the next morning are up and out the door at the sparrows fart.

I never felt so used in my life as it was an obvious ploy to gain free accommodation. Needless to say I don't speak to this friend any more!

Arrived at a friend's house (who is from a different culture) and was presented with a pair of slippers at the door.

What a fabulous thread! I thought of one to share (though it is relatively tame by comparison).

When visiting NYC with DH (long before the arrival of DD and DS), DH's cousin invited us to dinner at his flat in NJ, overlooking Manhattan, the night before we were due to fly home. He and his wife had a young baby who we met briefly before his bedtime. As soon as their son was in bed, the cousin and his wife started drinking heavily. While dinner was cooking, in the middle of a fairly banal conversation, the wife reached over and gouged a two inch long strip of flesh out of the top of my foot (I was in ballet flats - and I still have a scar) with her fingernail and laughed maniacally. By the time I had mopped up the bleeding in the bathroom, dinner was on the table, so I thought we should stay to eat, even though I was a little peeved at the random assault.

After dinner, DH's cousin's wife passed out on the sofa. DH's cousin brought out the whisky (offered to DH but not to me) and DH declined, saying that we should get a cab soon, as we had to leave our hotel for our flight at 6am the next morning. DH's cousin agreed, then asked us to wait for a moment while he went to the loo, but then he, too, passed out in his bedroom. DH and I began tearing the kitchen / living area apart looking for a phone book to call a cab to get us back to Manhattan while periodically attempting to rouse one of our hosts and worrying that if we couldn't wake them, was it OK to leave them in charge of their (admittedly sleeping) baby.

We couldn't find a phonebook, but after a couple of hours (during which we started seriously discussing whether or not we should phone the airline and change our flights, since things were not looking good), DH managed to rouse his cousin. The cousin insisted on walking us to the ferry terminal, although we pointed out that the last ferry had gone hours earlier, then walked us back to his flat and started to go back to bed. DH physically prevented him from going back to his bedroom and finally got him to call us a cab - which got us back to our hotel with three hours to spare before we had to leave to get home.

It remains one of the most surreal nights of my life.

I once went to a Christmas dinner with my ex's family and friends of his family, whilst staying with a couple where the wife was keen on calling her husband a lazy fat shit (and not in a joking way!).

Cue Christmas dinner where I know all of 3 people out of 12 at the dinner table and not only do I get accosted by two matriarchs asking me to decide which of their gravies was best (henceforth known as gravy-gate and accompanied by death stares and snide comments) but also had to endure another family where the youngest kid had popped a party popper in his mums ear with good intention but probably wasn't the most enjoyable of experiences.

She then began a tirade of "YOU HAVE MADE ME DEAF, I HATE YOU, YOU HAVE RUINED MY CHRISTMAS" (she hadn't gone deaf, as it turns out) and proceeded to weep uncontrollably into her half eaten dinner and Bollinger.

I just say there bemused and commented on the snow outside. Made a quick escape with some very awkward "please get me out of here" looks to exp!

Years ago, my DH visited his best friend and wife for the weekend, along with another friend. At the end of their visit, they were asked to write in their guest book, while the two of them eagerly stood over them watching. DH said their were lots of previous comments including from their parents, thanking the for their hospitality and critiqueing the food etc. all completely serious and they didn't run a guest house/ b&b etc - just their normal home. Very strange!

Not as funny or weird as some of the previous posts but I once got invited round to my friends house for a "cuppa and a catch up"...when I arrived at the time she suggested she wasn't in, only her dh was. Chatted to him for a while then when she arrived home an hour later she said hi then promptly sat at her computer with her back to me reading emails. Even her dh was a bit

He eventually said "erm darling, ducks here...what are you doing?" "Oh reading my emails" "well you could maybe do that later...ducks been here since 6 waiting for you!"

She did then come and acknowledge me, but there was no apology, she seemed confused as to why we were looking at her like this completely odd behaviour for her! Never happened since.

Just checking to see if there were any new additions to the thread, alas there are none

Some of these are breathtaking in their rudeness and selfishness! I have spent a very entertaining couple of days reading through the entire thread, and I although I don't have anything that even comes close to what some of you other mnetters have had to endure, I do have a couple of (fairly tame) stories to add.

First, I have a DB who is a lot older than I am, and when I was still living with my DPs we used to be invited to his house occasionally. My DB was a hoarder (considerably recovered now), and we would have to pick our way around piles and boxes of papers, clothes, rubbish, etc, to find somewhere to sit down. Added to this, because I am so much younger than him, he seemed to think that I was still a small child when I was in my late teens, and so the portions I would get when we ate there were tiny. Basically, one or two small boiled potatoes, a small spoonful of peas, and that runty bit of fish you get at the bottom of economy bags of frozen fish fillets that would just feed a child of five.

Next, I used to be a lodger in a house owned by a young couple who were about the same age as me. Because they were home-owning professionals with degrees and I was a lodger who just had an entry level office job, they assumed that I was a bit thick and needed constant correction and explanation of everything, particularly in the kitchen (he was admittedly a very good cook, but still). I therefore found it really awkward and frustrating trying to prepare food when they were there, which was difficult as it was an open plan kitchen and living area. What made it worse was that they loved entertaining at home, and even though they never said I couldn't go into the room, I couldn't exactly go and make food for myself while my landlord and landlady were having a dinner party, so frequently found myself holed up in my room for the entire evening, having to buy takeaways I couldn't afford, not even being able to get a glass of water (I braved it once, they all went silent and looked at me until I left. It was mortifying). I lived there for a year. I still don't know how I stuck it out that long without slapping the self-satisfied twats.

Ex MIL was massaging ex's feet in the living room before breakfast.

That one didn't last long!

I could feature on this thread as one of the bizzaros. One day shortly after we were married, my husband decided to bring a colleague home from work. It was my day off and I'd been doing a deep clean so, being dirty and hot, I was lolling on the sofa in just my knickers and a grubby t-shirt. Mr Lola hadn't thought to call and warn me that someone was coming, so the first I knew of it was when the door opened and I heard "come in and meet my wife!".

Now, a few things are important to note - the bedroom door was right beside the front door, and there was no way for me to get in there and change my clothes without both of then seeing me. Second, my husband works at a temple and his colleague was deeply religious.

Panicked, I bolted into the kitchen and ignored my husband calling out. He came to find me and I whispered furiously that I couldn't meet his colleague dressed like this. The only thing was, the kitchen didn't have a door (it had an archway) so the colleague would have heard voices and known I was there. I hid in the kitchen pretending not to exist until he made his excuses and left. Strangely he was only in the house about 10 minutes... he must have thought I was a nutcase

I rented a room years ago in a house owned by a similarish age lady professional in London. All OK for the first week, chatting in the kitchen after work nothing much, just friendly. On the first Saturday afternoon sitting down in the lounge she announced in a thick German accent that "actually I wasn't too bad (looking)" and that although it wouldn't happen immediately "we would, for sure, be having a sexual relationship soon" . I stayed out a lot more only using the room for sleeping only to get a complaint from her one night on my return that I was unfriendly and selfish, which ended up with a mug smashed over my head. Needless to say the next day after she had gone to work I rang my employers who came and took me and all my possessions away. I left the key on the side table and about £100 for the rent paid up to the end of the month and had only been there about two weeks!

I have 2 ill children and been stuck in the house for a few days now. I've read the whole if this thread and it's been thoroughly entertaining. My gast is flabbered! Genuinely sad that I've reached the end.

Love this thread

Not myself, but my aunt visited her in-laws. She stayed long enough to need the loo. She was asked "Wee or poo?". Turns out they have a water meter and if you only need a wee everybody goes for a wee before it gets flushed to save money. Mercifully guests are allowed to flush their poo without sharing. She now always goes before her visit and consumes no food or drink on such days.

A very long time ago - probably around 1978 - my mum's boyfriend at the time was doing some long-distance driving and picked up a hitch-hiking couple. They seemed ok, and he said that they must pop in if they were ever in the town where we lived. And so one day this very odd hippy couple arrived at the door, took possession of the front sitting room and stayed in it all day, every day. They had huge tearing rows pretty much every day, and would come out in the middle of the night to cook weird food. This went on for at least a week if not longer. They did eventually leave, but I don't know if they were told to go or they just decided their visit was over.

A couple of years later we were 'lucky' enough to be taken up by a man who became known as Dave The Wanker. We always used to have our door unlocked so he would just walk in every Sunday just as lunch was being dished up so because we were polite we would ask him to join us. Then he would talk long and often about how he had taught his ex-partner everything about sex and never wanted to teach a virgin again. And then he came round while my mum was out and got his knob out at me - I was utterly horrified, being only 15 and quite innocent. It was really shiny... We took to locking the door and pretending to be out till he stopped coming round.

Anyone else got one to share? I've loved reading these.

Last year I took my partner to meet my parents at their house for the first time. We lived 3 hours away away so were going to stay overnight. It was a prearranged visit but for some reason when we arrived my mum acted like we had royally pissed her off by turning up. Asked if we'd eaten, to which the answer was no, she huffed "Well I'm not going to cook for you!" We ended up getting sausage rolls from a petrol station round the corner. We had the most strained small talk you can imagine (I've had warmer chats at the hairdressers'). To this day I've no idea what her problem was - on every occasion since, she's been perfectly cordial.

Flightywoman - Dave The Wanker isn't in Herefordshire is he

Really enjoyed reading these! Housework totally neglected...

Mine isn't as good but in the interest of keeping this thread very much alive...

When I was a teen we all headed to my Aunts house for a bbq. It was tipping it down with rain, but they insisted on having it anyway with Uncle grilling away under the garage door. Aunt brought in the occasional plate of cool soggy overcooked meat products.
The next time they suggested a bbq the same thing happened so on the third time it was suggested my parents decided we were probably busy.

Several years later.....
We're all grown up now with kids of our own. Sister wants to celebrate youngest niece's birthday. Aunt suggests we use her new static caravan she wanted to show it off and have a bbq!
Guess what? It rained. Oh boy did it rained. Eight adults and three kids stuck in a small lounge in a tin box in the rain.
It gets worse. We went to pick up Sis and Bil on the way to the caravan, they were watching the rugby and weren't keen to rush. We waited, getting hungry. Sis is cross at me for bringing cupcakes (Mum had asked me to!) as she'd made a birthday cake - it was tiny.
Five minutes after arriving at tiny caravan Bil falls asleep. I mention this to Mum and she tells me that Bil has "had a tough month at work". Aparently that makes it all right.
Bbq isn't called off, instead everything is grilled in the tiny oven and we are treated to hours of Radio 2 and my Uncle going on about how good quality the sausages were I found them a bit too dry and my Aunt generally fussing over the mess three little kids can make. She has none of her own so doesn't really "get" kids. I now know more about the local butchers than I ever really want to.
Rain eases, Aunt decides she's had enough of the noise and insists the kids are taken to the play area in the caravan park. She doesn't want to come. Aparently there's a bouncy castle.
It was cold, still quite wet but the kids were happy as they'd had enough of being cooped up.
There was a bouncy castle but it wasn't inflated and my Dad let my DS run straight through it and fall over in a massive puddle in the middle where the plastic was folded. I didn't blame my Dad, DS was a bit of a handful at the time.
DNiece the older got bored and ran back to the caravan only to fall over on an empty hardstanding and scuff her knees quite badly.
Cue much flapping from Aunt when she sees soggy, muddy and blood spattered kids coming back. Never mind it was her idea we take them out IN THE RAIN in the first place.
Bil is still asleep. He misses the birthday cake coming out and the candles being blown out. He woke a bit later, ate some cold sausage and is treated to the same long story about the quality of the local butchers and we all go home.
Sis and Bil expect us to stop and their house for a bit before going on home. Niece the elder is potty training and I realise pretty quickly an accident has clearly not long happened upon sofa I am sitting on and it wasn't cleared up properly. The smell....
We go home after Nicece the elder covers lounge floor with every toy she owns...
Aunt and Uncle have never suggested anyone use their caravan for any sort of family event again but do occasionally remind us of how much clearing up they'd had to do.

Not as good as the Bum Towel incident (I'll be forever nervous of drying my hands in someone elses house after reading that!!) but it has put me off bbq's for life now.