Girls' body confidence - what do you think could improve it?

[KateMumsnet]

Hello everyone!

Lynne Featherstone, the Minister for Equalities, is chairing a Roundtable on Body Confidence at the House of Commons. She wants to get up to speed on the work that various independent groups are doing in this area, in order to champion them within government and get as much support for their work as possible.

One of the topics under consideration is sexualisation, and following our Let Girls Be Girls campaign we've been asked to come up with some proposals. We're going to push for the government to get behind our Lads' Mags campaign - but we also thought it was a good moment to ask for your thoughts more generally about body confidence issues and what, if anything, you'd like to see policy-makers doing.

So do please fire away - what else do you think could be done generally to improve the body confidence of young girls?

amen to titsalina.

yyy re cheerleading. teaching girls how to wiggle in front of boys, fgs.

HerBeatitude, I am absolutely shocked by what you said about sexist bullying in schools (and, likewise, by Titsalina's experience). I spent 13 years at an all girls' school, and my children are at single sex schools - so this particular thing has never crossed my mind. It is truly shocking.

Oracle, I think it is a MASSIVe issue which is simply being ignored, because girls don't matter. It was a mumsnet thread that alerted me to it, I went to an all girl school as well, so didn't experience it. That thread made me ask friends of mine who had gone to mixed schools, what they thought and all of them casually confirmed that sexual harrassment from male pupils was pretty much the norm and were amused and surprised by my horror.

I just hope DD passes her 11+ so that she can go to an all girl school. Alternatively (and better for all girls in the country, not just my DD) I hope that schools start taking sexual bullying as seriously as they pretend to take racial bullying.

Odd, isn't it that girls do better in single sex schools and boys do worse?

Indeed. What a horrible thing for girls to have to put up with, and at an age when they're at their most vulnerable.

I think another thing that gave me lots of confidence in myself generally was that my dad always made it clear that he thought I was the best and most beautiful thing in the universe (well, the best and most beautiful first-born girl, at any rate - however much I wanted him to praise me above my sisters!!) That and my mum having a completely sane attitude to body image.

Tallwiv: I don't think boys do worse at boys' schools. Wasn't Magdalen College School the highest-scoring school for GCSEs last year?

LOL tallwivglasses, I just can't imagine why

Overall I thought they still did Oracle.

I too was shocked by that thread HerBe as I also went to an all girls school. Not surprised at all that girls do better at a single sex school. Bloody obvious really if there is all that sexist shit going on in mixed schools. There was also the fact that a lot of schools didn't even mention sexism in their anti-bullying policies. So that could and should be dealt with fairly easily!

I think that tackling all the low level stuff that girls and women have to deal with every day would help increase body confidence e.g. leering, groping, sexist comments, page 3, constant reference to body shape in women's magazines and media. But also things like the fact that only pretty, thin women present on television/are film actors/in bands. It is just a never-ending reinforcement that women are only worthy if they are pretty and sexy.

I think the most shocking thing about the thread was how many women came forward and said they had suffered it...sexual harasment and bullying. There were a LOT...and it was only because of the thread that I realised there is no legislation in place.

It doesn't only work for girls being harassed by boys...male and female pupils who are gay are also suffering from sexual harasment at school.

Primary schools should make trousers school uniform for girls. The skirts restrict their play and make them more vulnerable and less dressed than their male counter parts so early on. They are less likely to climb and swing around like the boys do because they'll show their knickers. This has always really annoyed me.

Clothes manufacturers of high street brands should be called to account for failing to cut girls trousers to account for their rounding bums and hips. Their trousers are so straight at cut just like boys. My dd became self concious as she started to round out (she's 12) thinking she was fat because the trousers have to be squeezed on. This is not a problem with Boden I have to say.

I'm really glad MN has some sway and influence. Such a positive step. Well done all.

Yes to all the above... I think a practical thing also would be including on the school curriculum the tools to see a lot of these media fairytales "Z Celeb shows off her new body just six weeks after giving birth!" for what they are. So both men and women are aware these images are courtesy of Photoshop and not Mother Nature. It might help them to treat girls (and indeed boys) not to judge themselves or others against media images.

I would like to see magazines label their photoshopped pictures. I would like to see more media coverage of womens sport.

Men/boys have always liked my very ordinary, lumpy and scarred body just the way it is, the only bad comments that I experienced at school were from other girls. Unfortunately that sort of ultra critical attitude is reflected by the media and reinforced by the "circle of shame" mentality. Perhaps we just need to look at ourselves a bit more closely rather than expecting some form of government legislation.

my daughter was never a delicate soul, she has huge feet and is very tall and always has been.

The comments she got from adults when she was a child really shocked me. all done in a lighthearted way

i was never an assertive kind of person, i'm the sort who will let comments pass just to keep things civil, but these comments i never did let pass. becuase my daughter wasn't fat. She had a good appetite and was very active. She liked to try new foods and i loved that she did -unlike her twin brother.

her twin brother is a skinny rake, but my oldest son (like his sister) was a good medium built kid, and he never recieved the comments that his sister did.

Therefore i would like to suggest that adults need to be educated too and that this should be part of parenting classes which are universal. i think adults need educating becuase children are more influenced by the adults around them than any tv programme i would suggest.

i also think that spidermamas suggestion of girls wearing trousers as part of a school uniform is a good one. dd always did wear trousers and this was becuase i couldn't be arsed ironing pleats and making sure socks were whiter than white.

It starts at home. My daughter is very happy that she's got a belly, as she knows that she's about to grow (my children grow wider, then upwards) and she'll be back to normal again. She also knows that body shape is just that, a shape and she's comfortable in her own skin. She's aware that I am overweight, and that I am doing something about that not to conform, but so I am healthy, and I am doing this by eating well and exercising, rather than dieting. She asks me regularly is so and so airbrushed on tv, magazines etc. She is 11. She does have some peer pressure in school, but is learning that she doesn't have to do everything her friends do.

Starting at home, maternal body image problems and dieting culture have a huge impact on girls and the development of eating problems. I agree with lots of other comments.

The current advert for bread with the Olympic cyclist infuriates me. As if you could train like her on two slices of toast and a poached egg, and as if what she looks like in lycra is her consideration when choosing what to eat - ffs, it's damaging, dangerous and pathetic. As a teenager I would have thought "if that's all she eats I'd better eat much, much less". Women would be much fitter if sports were presented as something enjoyable and not some sort of penance for daring to eat more than one potato at teatime .

Erm, yes, so I would like to see proper nutrition and exercise as part of the school curriculum, and agree with the posters who say that gym uniform should not be skimpy/short/tight, especially not at a mixed school. I used to dread PE, having to parade in front of the boys (who were all wrapped up in tracksuits!) in a little aertex top, miniskirt and ankle socks. The school I went to took the view that we should be "grateful" for the unwanted sexual attention of the boys, including serious sexual assault. Vile.

The habitual sexual harassment of girl children at secondary school, is something that no-one in the media or government are remotely interested in discussing.

I think it's because girls don't tell their parents that this is happening to them.

So no-one knows except the girls themselves, and the boys who are doing it, who consider it normal and reasonable.

It's time it was blown out into the open and the adults who are supposed to fucking protect children, acknowledged it and did something about it.

This photograph has been airbrushed written under any photograph published that has been airbrushed.

Then I can tell my daughters look it isn't real it is all fake. Plus if you have to state the photo has been airbrushed it will take away some of the magic for those publishing those photos.

HeeBea - I have no idea what happens at my dd2's secondary with boys, I went to an all girls school - what do the boys do?

Hold on, I'll see if I can find the thread.

But basically, they keep girls in line with shouts of slut, slag, fridid etc. - the sort of insults which if they were racial, would be LEA reporting matters.

Also space invading, physical assaults - bra twanging, hands up skirts, groping - sexual assaults in effect.

And schools are doing sweet FA about it.

Ah yes, here it is

It followed on from a report which said that 1 in 3 girls has been groped at school.

IE one in three girls suffers a sexual assault at school.

That's not counting the verbal abuse they have to put up with.

It's a fucking scandal.