Dating scan shock

[emma911030]

Today I went for my dating scan. The lady scanning me initially was a trainee who was a sister within the hospital.. either way. She found baby and said there we are with little heart flickering and said and there's just the one to which my response was thank god i think I'd have a heart attack If there was two.. so the sonographer kinda said Woohh (I thought that was her response to my comment) but she got the scanning lady to move across to which there was a second baby. I literally said are you serious.. followed by 'fuck' (excuse my language) and I burst into tears I didn't know what to do. Was on my own cause obviously have to go on our own. My appointment was at 9 this morning and I'm still not sure I've got my head around it. I was dating at only 10 weeks 6 days so I'm back again next Thursday when I will be 12 weeks exactly.. I already have a little boy and when there's are due he will 2 months before his 2nd birthday. I'm literally no idea how I'm going to cope with 3 under 2. But before I even get to that I'm so terrified something is going to go wrong it's really playing on my mind and worrying me.. how can I get over this shock and worry.

The advice is Covid secure not Covid free so you should be able to return to work if you want to.

I was in my own at the scan when I found out I was expecting twins. I already had 2 DCs. I wasn't really happy either - all I could say was "I'll have to get a new car". But I got used to it pretty quickly.
DA was 20 months when they were born.
Twins aren't quite double the work but about 1.5. They learn very quickly that they won't be picked up straight away. Looking after the toddler was much harder.
I was scanned a lot, every week for the last few weeks. I had no health issues at all. They were born at 36+5. As I had had two "normal" vaginal births I chose to deliver that way rather than have a CS.
I was working in London at the time but living in Northampton which didn't do nuchal scans so I paid for that privately plus an amnio.

I went on mat leave at about 33 weeks I think. I was ready to go by then (long commute). I took 2 weeks off at around 24 weeks as well on consultant's advice. He said that was the riskiest time.

Hi @emma911030 I think you have to tell work by 15 weeks before due date (what I'm not 100% sure of is if this is your 40 weeks due date, or in our case as we know they will be 36 weeks or earlier, if it is that date). But you don't HAVE to tell them yet. Personally, I told my work very early because a) I knew timing for maternity cover recruitment was critical (I'm a teacher, so they needed to get someone for September, even though I'm not till halfway through the term, which meant advertising before Easter) and b) it makes it easier to sort out time off for appointments/scans (as a teacher, I have no flexibility about leave, so its so much easier if you can just tell them why you need cover!).

If you want to work, and are not able to do so because of regulations that include pregnant workers, I'm pretty sure they'd have to pay you or it would be discrimination? Not sure who'd you'd check this with. If you are allowed to, you'll need to judge the risk yourself and decide if it's worth it to return before you start your mat leave (personally, I am really really hoping to be physically able to go in right up till my 36-week due date! I can't really afford to do otherwise).

@TooTrusting, the car thing is such an issue, isn't it?!? My DH is totally in denial about this. We have a 4 seater. There is no way this will work (already have a DD). I keep pointing out to him that he'd have to travel on the bike rack