8 weeks pregnant with ID twins, 2.5 yr old DD, worried about everything, esp TTTS

[Clockers]

Hello, we had an early scan last week which show ID (mo/di) twins - reason for scan was that last year I had 3 mcs in a row so as you can imagine it has been quite a rollercoaster!

I had such an easy pregnancy/birth with my dd and a realise that things will be much harder this time and am very worried about TTTS - i keep reading about it and freaking myself out. The hospital said I would have scans as 12 & 16 weeks then fortnightly after that so I guess I will be monitored well but I am already very scared.
I am also worried about coping with all 3 of them - Grandparents are not on the doorstep and my DH leaves the house at 7.15 and gets back at 8pm. I feel sad for my little girl that she will have to adjust so much and am worried that she wont have the same closeness with her brothers/sisters that she would have with just one - won't the twins have a special bond of their own?
I am all over the place and very teary - hormones i know!

Any advice would be welcome !

Hi - congratulations! I'm also 8 weeks pregnant with twins, with a 4.5 year old DD. I think it's usual to panic a bit - I am doing it too. I have no idea what TTTS is, and tbh it sounds as if I should probably leave it that way. You don't say how old your DD is but who's to say that she won't be thrilled with two little babies to help look after? As for coping, I trust that we will because we have to. I think being organised and finding some kind of routine will probably help. What kind of support do you have locally in the way of baby and toddler groups, etc? Have you got friends you can draft in to help? It's all quite a long way off still, so try to keep these wobbles in perspective - not easy if you are feeling as tired and sick as me!

oh sorry, just saw your header says your DD is 2.5.

OP - I know exactly how you feel. Our identical DTDs are 12 weeks old and our DS is just 3. When we found out at the 12 week scan that it was twins I had all the same thoughts - sad that this pregnancy would inevitably be more difficult than with my DS (who was born in the birthing pool with no drugs etc), grief for the one-to-one sibling relationship my DS and DC2 would have had, fear of developing TTTS. I cried for two days before I started to come round to the idea.

As it turned out, we had suspected pre-stage 1 TTTS so from 18 weeks had scans every week until 26 weeks, then every fortnight. We were referred to Queen Charlotte's hospital to see their specialist team who were very reassuring. The odds of actually developing TTTS are about 15%, and even then it may not develop beyond stage 1, which doesn't need treatment.

It's a huge shock but you've got time to let it sink in. I found it hard when everyone else was so excited that we were having twins and I felt like saying "I don't want two babies, I only want one". But now they're here they're lovely and DS is thrilled to have two baby sisters. I'm sure they'll have a bond as they grow but I'm confident that they'll love their big brother.

Sorry to ramble - your post really reminded me of my reaction, but it really is great now. You will be fine. xx

hi there - thanks for the response - the tiredness and sickness has ramped up over the last few days - definitely a double dose! Congrats on your pregnancy too! Are they identical?
There is a family centre and a couple of toddler groups - and my dd starts preschool in Sept so that will give us some time to do things in the morning. I should probably stop with the googling - am my own worst enemy sometimes!

Grandparents are about 45 mins away so not too bad and i'm sure they will go out of their way to do what they can. We are newish to this area so havent made any friends yet - the friends I left behind are about an hour away. Just having a panicky day - I think getting to 12 weeks and being able to spread the news will help it to sink in.

MrsIcarus - your post has made me feel much better - thank you and congrats on your twins!

Thank you!

We've had a lot of support from our local twins club - you can check on the TAMBA website if there's one in your area. Good luck. xx

Hi there!

Firstly congratulations! I am mum to 6 mo ID girls and although it's tough work it's wonderful! :)

Not read all the responses - but just want to let you know only about 15% of ID pregnancies are affected by TTTS so yours may well not be. It is an awful condition and very frightening.My little girls got stage 2 TTTS and i had emergency surgery within hours of detection (at 17 weeks) - I'll telling you this BECAUSE even if it happens to you your babies can make it despite the odd!! :) I carried them to 34 weeks, they were delivered by ECS and only needed minimal help in ICU. They are now chubby and healthy little girls :)

So don't worry too much and just be aware of the signs of TTTS incase something happens.

Hello and congratulations!

I can't give you any advice re your DD but like Twinnies (hello Twinnies!), know a little about TTTS. I was diagnosed at 19 weeks with severe TTTS and had the laser ablation that afternoon. We made it to 31 weeks, and my thriving 8 month olds are currently fast asleep upstairs. So yes, TTTS is a risk but the best thing you can do is be aware of it and the warning signs and make sure you get the care you should with this sort of pregnancy and remember that if you do get it, it can be treated successfully.

Hello and congratulations!

I can't give you any advice re your DD but like Twinnies (hello Twinnies!), know a little about TTTS. I was diagnosed at 19 weeks with severe TTTS and had the laser ablation that afternoon. We made it to 31 weeks, and my thriving 8 month olds are currently fast asleep upstairs. So yes, TTTS is a risk but the best thing you can do is be aware of it and the warning signs and make sure you get the care you should with this sort of pregnancy and remember that if you do get it, it can be treated successfully.

Hi Silver! :) see you on the other thread soon!

Twinnies and Silverangel - I just wanted to say that I followed your TTTS thread whilst pregnant and it was a huge help to me. I was terrified when my consultant suspected TTTS, but each day I read how you were all coping with TTTS and it gave me hope that even if mine developed the girls had a good chance. Such a positive thread with lots of useful info - thank you.

I was stressing about everything throughout my pg with id twins. Every week was a bonus. In the end, after a couple of scares of contractions beginning at 22 weeks and 33 weeks, my healthy girls were born at 36weeks. They are now 7 months old and healthy in every way.

I think it's natural to worry, but trust your body and rest. Don't overdo it and eat what you can to get through morning sickness (if you get it - mine lasted 16 weeks and was horrendous, especially while working and looking after my then 3yo).

The girls were in SCBU for 8 days due to low birth weights and dtd1 had jaundice and respiritory distress at birth - which sounds dramatic but was quickly resolved and she was just observed closely to begin with. dtd2 was with me instantly after birth and I saw dtd1 after 6 hours (didn't feel as long as that but I did pester to see her a lot.

As long as the heartbeats are strong and the sizes are similar at 8 weeks then there is no reason you won't have 2 healthy babies at the end. Yes things can change but you will be so closely monitored that any signs of pre eclampsia etc will be dealt with so quickly.

Good luck, and try to enjoy your pg. :)

thank you all - your messages have made me feel much more positive - will try and rest up and not panic too much - easier said than done of course!

Hi again - no mine are not ID. I've got my 3 month scan at the end of this month. I had gestational diabetes in my last pregnancy and am already injecting insulin, and I am hypothyroidic so am taking thyroxine every day. All in all I am going to be very closely monitored.

I have 17 month old ID twins born at Queen CHarlotte's - aren't the team fantastic there MrsIcarus?
Just wishing you all the best, try not to worry, I realise that is easier said than done, mine came at 34 &3 and we were home within 5 days

Dear Clockers, I'm 10 weeks pregnant with MoDi twins too and trying hard not to freak out! My other half works crazy hours too and my older one will only be 13 months when the twins are due! You're not in London are you? Am all over the place too esp when I think of all the risks.

Hey clockers and other expectant twin mums - just to let you know there is an ante-natal thread for twin mummies here

I'm actually out the other side, but I found it a huge source of reassurance. I've got 10 week old fraternal boys and a 2 yr old DD and we're doing well. I was really worried about DD and we've had our ups and downs, but it's really lovely as well. I was VERY worried about the birth as I'd had a totally drug free, easy(ish) delivery with DD and was concerned about being medicalised too much because of the 'high risk' label you get with twins. In the end I had a totally normal (except for getting two babies ) delivery at term with no trauma to any of us. So there are positive birth stories out there too! Good luck and hopefully see you about the boards.

hi Clockers, I have not read all the thread but just wanted to say that I was in a similar position to you - found out I was pregnant with id (MCDA) twins at 9 weeks pregnant, and I had a 2yo DD.

My beautiful boys have now arrived - safe and sound at 36+5 weeks, born naturally and no problems at all. DD (who was 26 months when they arrived) LOVES her brothers and is obsessed with them (in a lovely way!). I too was worried about everything that could go wrong and the impact on DD - but so far (and admitedly it is early days, they are not even three weeks yet!) it is going really well and DD is absolutely lovong her new role as big sister - it has brought a whole new dimension to our family that is wonderful. Yes it is hard work, and yes the pregnancy was hard and you never stop worrying - but it is all worth it. You will be well looked after with regular scans, so any signs of any problems or difficulties and you will get the care and support you need.

the ante-natal twins thread is great for having a moan , chatting to other twin mums and twin mums-to-be

congratualtions and good luck!!

I really remember many of the emotions you are experiencing when I found out I was pregnant with twins. My DD1 was not even two at the time and I was really worried about how it would impact on her. Everyone I know with twin babies and a toddler went through the same thing. My twins were non-identical but I was extremely anxious about the higher risks associated with twins - quite needlessly as it turned out. The chances of things going wrong with twins are not nearly as high as you think and, as with singletons, most are absolutely fine. My twins are 9 mths now and I won't lie to you, it has been hard going at times, but I can't imagine life without all of them and my DD1 certainly likes having siblings. There have already been times when the three of them have been laughing together at something my DDH and I did not understand. One thing I might consider if I were you is getting someone to come in for the last hour or two before your husband gets home in the earlier weeks. It is hard going putting an older one to bed while two babies cry for food/ comfort. Obviously it depends on your resources, but I would not shy away from investing in a bit of support at this time of day short term. You will not need it forever, but it could be a big comfort when you need it most.

Thank you all for your messages - I am now 15 weeks and am feeling much better about it all. Obviously I am worried about things like ttts and premature labour but I am trying to enjoy being pregnant as well and am taking it one day at a time. I will check out the other thread
Thanks again!

hi just wanted to share my support to as another mummy from the twins thread its been a great source of support and the mummys who have already delivered give lots of advice, i too am pg with id twin girls, and totally relate to the scary thoughts, i found at 6 weeks due to bleeding so went in expecting the pg to be gone but got a bogof offer!!! it was extremely stressful in the beginning and i have only just started to worry less about ttts, im currently 29+3 and actually believe i will meet my little girls, :) my consultant was bluntly honest at our first meeting so don't be concerned if they are very direct, my mw was a good source of support during the early weeks, my consultant is now much more positive and in the last 2 appointments talked about me delivering :) in terms of the pg it is harder these are dc3&4 for me, but rest when you can and don't be afraid to ask for help, also if you work be prepared to finish early, i finished at 27 weeks with mat leave starting at 32 weeks, absolutely feeling 100% better :) all the best and hope we see you new twin mummies over on the twins club 4 thread