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Original poster

Does 'Christian name' bother you, if you're not a Christian?

101 replies

acnebride · 21/02/2005 14:38

Am sulking childishly over something that happened at my new work at a GP practice and would appreciate either being told that this doesn't matter or having my sulk validated . I heard one of the receptionists ask a mum who was wearing a hijab for her child's Christian name. The mum clearly wasn't delighted, but didn't make it a big issue; me as a PC wuss, and also having a Jewish son and husband, was quite upset. So at the next Practice meeting I said that I thought it was better to ask people for 'first names'. No-one objected at the time, but my boss has since reversed the decision and said staff can say whatever they like, because 'this is a Christian country'.

At least this decision allows me to carry on doing what I think best, but am slightly upset about it. Also worried that I've marked myself as a humourless PC person at my new work! (hey - truth hurts).

If you're not a Christian, or your child is not, does being asked for your Christian name even remotely bother you?

OP posts:
motherinferior · 21/02/2005 14:54

It's NOT a Christian name, FFS.

Cod · 21/02/2005 14:54

Message withdrawn

suzywong · 21/02/2005 14:54

fabulous platform for pedantary though,

suzywong · 21/02/2005 14:55

ooo coddy, great minds stir alike

Cod · 21/02/2005 14:55

Message withdrawn

Cod · 21/02/2005 14:55

Message withdrawn

PiccadillyCircus · 21/02/2005 14:55

I am a Christian and I'm bothered about people referring to Christian names. Everyone isn't a Christian, so why can't people used first or forename?

Cod · 21/02/2005 14:55

Message withdrawn

NotQuiteCockney · 21/02/2005 14:56

Cod, I can see your point, and Christianity isn't just "dominant" here, it's state-sanctioned. But I just think "first name" or "given name" is clearer. Some Christians (RC I think?) have a first name, and a Saint's name, so "Christian name" might cause some confusion there, too. Of course, this isn't a Catholic country.

(In French, they say "family name" and "forename", more or less, where the language has been more influenced by RC.)

Original poster
acnebride · 21/02/2005 14:57

thanks for 'given name' NotQuite - that's better.

I guess Cod that my view was that 'first name' applies to everybody (only obviously it doesn't!) whereas Christian name doesn't; not that I am dissing Christians in any way. And believe me I have walked out or spoken up when I have felt that Christians, or religion in general, are being dissed. But my boss feels very much like you I think. Luckily we are in a place where people can fairly easily move GP practices if they really dislike the culture of this practice, which is traditional British, and Christian. But the doctors are great, which is what matters.

OP posts:
Caligula · 21/02/2005 14:57

It doesn't bother me at all (and I'm a raging atheist).

I think it's quite a quaint, charming thing. No idea what the origin is, it rather conjures up that first names were all Christian and Family names were all Satanist or something.

I consciously wouldn't refer to a Muslim's "Christian" name thought, because they obviously don't have one.

PiccadillyCircus · 21/02/2005 14:57

I find partner annoying too - DH is my husband.

He says that where he works it is much less usual for people to have husbands/wives so he would worry he were offending them to talk about me as a wife.

Don't quite understand his logic really.

Caligula · 21/02/2005 14:58

I find carer and birth mother annoying. I'm their bloody MOTHER FGS!

Original poster
acnebride · 21/02/2005 14:59

ooh, that found me out! the culture is trad British BUT the doctors are great... oh well, I can run but not hide i guess.

right i'll shut up now. i know this is minor but it's just been bugging me that's all... now, is Cruz a first name or a first girly name?

OP posts:
MancMum · 21/02/2005 15:02

I agree that I hate use of Christian name but it is one of those saying that is so overused as not to have much of its original meaning left... guess if we object to its use, as strict non chrsitians we should ignore xmas day boxing day etc and not join in with presents and not working... and I am not prepared to do that!

stitch · 21/02/2005 15:03

i hate being asked for my christian name. only the receptionists at the doctors surgery seem todo so. i dont make a fuss of it, but it is silly of them.
also cant stand the termm partner. to me that implies business partner. and marriage is not something to be ashamed off..

NotQuiteCockney · 21/02/2005 15:05

You can enjoy festivals without getting involved in their original meaning ... if I could stand fireworks, I would enjoy Guy Fawkes, without sharing in the "burn a Catholic" original meaning. (Instead I wander around saying "Guy Fawkes: Last Honest Man to Enter Parliament" and complaining about the noise and mess.)

I was raised hard-core atheist, but we still did Xmas and Easter, just without the whole Jesus thing. They're pagan festivals underneath, anyway (Winter solstice, spring equinox).

tortoiseshell · 21/02/2005 15:12

Doesn't bother me at all. Actually prefer it because I don't use my first name, so if I'm asked for my 'first name' I get all bothered and 'well, it's not actually my first name, do you want my first name, or do you want my actual name....?' by which time whoever is asking me has either moved on to the next person in the queue, or has decided I'm mad.

MI - that's interesting re your dd's names being Jewish - my dd has the same name as one of yours, and I'd always thought of it as being Christian, but of course it is Jewish! It's the one with 6 letters, which I think is the most beautiful girls' name in the world (which is why we chose it!).

tortoiseshell · 21/02/2005 15:13

Meant to add, people don't have a problem calling Christmas 'Christmas', even though that specifies it as a Christian festival. But if I thought someone would be offended then I would use forename, or given name. Or I might say 'What is the name you like to be known by?'

Twiglett · 21/02/2005 15:17

I think its very easy to shout 'pedant' when it doesn't affect you because you happen to be christian .. it can affect other people quite a lot and I think its wrong

suzywong · 21/02/2005 15:19

it was easy to shout pedant, and I'm sorry

FWIW my dh and both ds have non christian names as middle names, so I can forsee a lot of fraught form filling in the future

lisalisa · 21/02/2005 15:25

Message withdrawn

Blu · 21/02/2005 15:42

I think it's still in such comon usage that I personally wouldn't actually be offended, it's one of those things that is in the language and doesn't always get used 'consciously'. However I think doctors, teachers, people who need to deal sensitively with a wide diversity of people are just being obstructive if they make a deliberate point of holding on to our good old dominant traditions. And it's a bit lazy, ian't it?

yingers74 · 21/02/2005 15:45

does not really offend me although I have noticed it is used far less than in the past, more and more people say first name instead.

JoolsToo · 21/02/2005 15:50

it just a common term as far as I'm concerned. It doesn't offend me in the least but then I try not to waste my time being offended all the time.

Also I always go back to the point that if someone 'slips up' pc wise but you know that they're not intending to be offensive then why be offended?

Must say a lot of Forms I see these days have 'First Name' on them. Saying Christian Name may be generation thing - its a term I would use without thinking about it really cos that's what we always said.

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