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Multicultural families

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Original poster

I am struggling with DD's pride in her heritage when she only identifies with white children

52 replies

Katymac · 04/12/2007 21:04

DD is mixed race (DH is Jamaican & I am White)

Every single World Book Day, fancy dress, dress like a character she chooses a very 'white' middle class character

She has been bullied about being mixed race & I am trying (& have been for some time) to instill some pride in 'who' she is

The latest is teh Guides Christmas party in January () they have to come dressed as a character in a book

So far we have Roberta from The Railway Children, Titty or Nancy from Swallow & Amazons, Lucy from The L, W & W, or Heidi

I will let her choose one of those but I am wracking my brain to find a mixed race character she could be

Any suggestions?

OP posts:
coldtits · 04/12/2007 21:09

It's difficult - it's not like there are many mixed race characters in books or films! I have had a google but to be honest can't find anyone

coldtits · 04/12/2007 21:10

It's difficult - it's not like there are many mixed race characters in books or films! I have had a google but to be honest can't find anyone

binkleandflip · 04/12/2007 21:12

Who does she want to dress up as?

Original poster
Katymac · 04/12/2007 21:12

I know

I am trying to instill the feeling of 'best of both' but she is concentrating on the visual prompts she gets

Eg all her friends, me as the female role model in the home, TV starts etc

All the black/mixed seem to be from america (she said she could be Rudy, or the little one from my wife & kids) or Gloria from Desmonds - but only after much discussion and prompting did she she herself as in any way 'black'

OP posts:
Original poster
Katymac · 04/12/2007 21:13

Roberta or one of the others in the OP

OP posts:
pukkapatch · 04/12/2007 21:14

mary, mother of jesus?

coldtits · 04/12/2007 21:16

Was she, Pukkapatch? I didn't know that!

I love this place sometimes,

Original poster
Katymac · 04/12/2007 21:16

like that one

When she was Mary, the infant teacher suggested that she wasn't the traditional colouring for Mary - I completely floored her by explaining that as Mary was born in the middle East the chances of her being blonde & blue eyed were fairly slim. The teacher looked so confused.

OP posts:
binkleandflip · 04/12/2007 21:17

So I think I'd let her dress up as who she wants to dress up as tbh

pukkapatch · 04/12/2007 21:17

well, she may not have been black, but she definitly wasnt white.
and from something i remember reading in the bible, (cant quote chapter and verse sorry) jesus had africanish, curly black hair.
obvioulsy being an immaculate conception, itsreasonable to assume..........

tissy · 04/12/2007 21:19

Pocahontas? Not white, but not African extraction.....

pukkapatch · 04/12/2007 21:19

mulan?

binkleandflip · 04/12/2007 21:20

Surely he was of arabian extraction?

Original poster
Katymac · 04/12/2007 21:21

Pukkapatch, it isn't really about who/what she dresses up as, more about how she sees herself

If she had come up with 3 or 4 characters and even 1 had been non-white, this thread wouldn't exist. However she doesn't acknowledge her dual heritage and that concerns me

OP posts:
ImmodestRubyRioja · 04/12/2007 21:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tamum · 04/12/2007 21:22

I know this is an absolutely rubbish suggestion but in the film of A Little Princess (which is similar genre to the things she's suggesting) Becky is played by a black child actress. I just don't know if that would help though, because she's a maid, and in the book she's white. It must be hard if she likes those kind of old-fashioned classics. There isn't anyone in Harry Potter is there?

binkleandflip · 04/12/2007 21:22

Maybe she doesnt see herself as a colour? Sorry, I know that comment could be misconstrued but I mean it seems more important to you than her at this young age (which is fine)

Original poster
Katymac · 04/12/2007 21:25

If she hadn't been bullied about being 'black' I would be content that she didn't see herself as any particular colour, however as she was treated badly because she was 'black' i feel a need that she acknowledge her colour

OP posts:
pukkapatch · 04/12/2007 21:25

that region has always been a bit of a melting pot.
jesus was a bit afro according to the bible, (i'm sure someone can quote chapter and verse) and since it is accepted that he was an immaculate conception by both christians and muslims, then mary must have been not white?
and jamaicans are a mix of all sorts of different ethnicities.

i understand what you are saying about how she identifies herself. but i think you are on a bitof a losing streak here. i am pakistani, and lived outside fo the uk for most of my childhood, but eve n i identified far more with western images than any of my own. because of the influence of the wester n media. from enid blyton and narnia, to disney and hollywood.
its just the world we live in.

Original poster
Katymac · 04/12/2007 21:29

Really Pukka? That is interesting. As we live in a very non-multicultural area, I feel that she sees a very 'white' world.

But if your opinion is that this view is more widespread, then I feel slightly more positive about her vision

OP posts:
binkleandflip · 04/12/2007 21:30

I can understand that viewpoint completely. At the same time I dont think letting her dress up as a white character as she wishes will be seen as her not acknowledging or taking pride in her heritage IYSWIM.

I talk from some experience (that of a very close friend of mine) whose son is occasionally hassled for being black (he's mixed race also). He takes the view that his skin colour shouldnt be an issue and so he wont acknowledge or highlight it as such because it isnt the sum of him.

binkleandflip · 04/12/2007 21:32

our friend is egyptian and has very tight curly hair so that is why I suggested the arabian extraction btw - I know next to nothing about bible-y stuff

binkleandflip · 04/12/2007 21:32

..which is kinda embarrassing

pukkapatch · 04/12/2007 21:33

yup. in fact i dont think my parents were ever aware of just how much we identified with western images.
now i sometimes identify with women from bollywood films, but i think that is mainly to do with the fact that i love dancing, and in my minds eye i have thesame perfect bodyshape as the actresses

pukkapatch · 04/12/2007 21:36

binkle, egypt is in africa! but africa is a huge huge continent, with lots of different races of people. negroes are one race. egyptians are mostly arabs, but obviously with mixed genes (plenty of greek meditaranean ifluences there too) somalia and sudan may be very dark in colour, but there features are very different fromthe classic negro features that we tend to think of as 'african'

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