mixed race beautiful and all . pleaser ead and reply

[emma187]

hi im emma i have a 1 year son i often get funny looks wen with his father.... im white he is black. our son looked typically mixrace when born lots and lots of black hair. as he has gotten older his hair is dark brown and his skin just looks permenantly tanned.you can tell hes mixed but not sure of how mixed.. iv only met a other mum who dont have typically looking mixrace kids whatever that is suposed to be i guees it just goes to show that genes are all different . My friend daughter is too half black half white and has very pale skin with auburn afro hair . i expected him to be look alot different than he does but I really dont care whether people can tell if he is black mixed but i am concerned what he will feel like wen older. And how he will be identified.
I dont no y people do have the urge to wonder.......about other people and hope he wont have to face some of the things i have.........
im just wondering if any1 else has experienced anyhing like this..................

thankyou every1 4 listening to me rant on

I'm angloindian and I look neither english nor indian. Brits are a very mixed bunch and I think how you look has less and less to do with your cultural identity and loyalties.

My DS looks scandinavian despite having a very small proportion of norther European genes but I have every intention of educating him in his varied heritage.

I am Latina. I have quite fair skin, with dark brown hair and eyes.

My husband is a dirty-blonde, blue-eyed Scot.

DD1 is white as milk, w/light brown hair that goes goldy in summer and pea green eyes.

DD2 has olive skin, even darker than mine. W/dirty blonde hair and hazel eyes.

A couple of years ago, in South East London of all places, my friend's brother in law who is Asian (my friend is white), was nearly arrested by the police when waiting on the pavement with his daughter because she looks white and they thought he had kidnapped her! They only stopped when his wife came running out of the shop and gave them a mouthful and threatened to sue them.

My DTs are mixed race (I'm black and DH is white) and I have had comments like are they yours, particularly when they see DT2 who is white with blue eyes (DT1 is brown with brown eyes). However, last week, the best comment yet came from a workman at our house. He saw the boys and he asked if I actually lived there with the family. He thought I was the cleaner! I gave him such a filthy look, he finished what he was doing very quickly.

Speedy
My sister is much darker than I am. She's married to a very white man of Swedish descent and when she went to meet her daughter's school bus one day, and got asked a) if she spoke English b)if she was the girl's nanny.

What irritates me is the fact that these people do not have an aversion to vocalising their narrow-minded assumptions!

now speedy............ breathe...............

breathe in...........................
breathe out.................................

and in..............................
and out................................

You too expat!

My poor sister was RAGING that day.

She wrote a complaint to the council.

It really hurt her daughter's feelings.

I'm still waiting for people to stop asking if the kids are mine!

And in................
And out...................

I'm breathing.........

Oh yes, the Nanny thing, the cleaner thing, the are these really your children etc etc! I can laugh it off now but when I was a younger and out with my Mum it could be awful sometimes. People's attitudes were far worse 30+ years ago I think.

Do you speak English? Are you authorised to pick up this child?

Yes, my sister has had all these comment directed at her.

And even someone say 'Well, that can't be your child. She's white.'

expat your dds sound more gorgeous the more i read about them!

my friend is mixed race (she is very dark with black hair) her dh is scandinavian

their daughter looks exactly likeher mother but her v curly hair is v blonde and she has v light blue eyes

it breaks my friends heart how she has to tell people again and again "yes im her mother"

why do people have to be so ignorant.

I get it all the time, my four look so different that people assume I am childminding. dd and ds are white, very fair with blonde hair and blue eyes, and the twins are indian/white mixed race. dt1 looks very indian - hard to see he is mixed race at all, but I think dt2 would be quite hard to place. He is losing his summer tan so is a lot fairer now but has brown hair and brown eyes and doesn't quite look white.

The number of times I get asked are they all yours?! Nope - I jsut steal babies for the fun of dragging four children round the supermarket!

I am white and my DH is white/asian mixed and looks asian. DS1 is white with blonde curly hair. He is lovely looking like most mixed kids are but I hate to think people will think DH is not his dad. I feel a bit sad that he may be teased when he gets to school about that. Anyone had that? Am pg again and from what you guys are all saying it seems that siblings can come out completely different colours. how fascinating!

I suppose it would depend where you live. If you live in a culturally diverse area (and send him to school there) then he's unlikely to be teased for it.

I remember having a stand up row with a woman in Budgens about how DD1 couldn't be my daughter (I'm black) cos she was so white. Apparently this woman knew what mixed children looked like. In the end I walked away... after all I'm the one who did the 6.5hr labour... so I think I'm capable of knowing she's mine!

And breathe...............

my friend is white with a black dp. One child has very curly hair but her little boy although dark skinned has jet black but straight straight hair. She was on a bus in mexico and her dp and daughter were separated from them and sitting at the back. The bus stopped and police got on and started questionning her (in an agressive manner )and gesturing towards her son. The upshot is they thought he was mexican and that she had kidnapped him!!!!!! She was petrified!

I am as black as they come and my husband is white not particulaly pale.

Our son blue eyes and what I would descibe as blond curls.

I haven't had any comments latelymaybe because I live in a pretty mixed are at the moment.

When my son was younger I had interesting conversations with people.

He was born "white" with straight here and everytime I said "would you like mummy to .........." whatever it is I was asking some people looked at me funny. Shows what they know.

As Mars puts it I am the one who was there at the 31.5 hour labour and saw them pull out a 10.5 pound bruiser.

I will not be a thread killer . Not on my first week back

Sorry but I think you may have to be! lol

So glad to see how many sensitive mums there are out there thinking about how their children are treated or regard themselves. Fwiw I think (depending on where you live) it may be impossible to avoid some negativity or ignorance but as long as your children have been given a positive message at home about themselves they will be ok.

Sad story: I knew of a mixed race girl with Irish mum and (unknown) black father. Because of the shame and prejudice within her own family she was brought up being told her dad was Spanish when it was SO obvious from her features that she had black origins. I often wondered whether she ever guessed or confronted her mum about it.

I was very lucky (black African mum with Chinese a few generations back and white English dad) as both parents taught me to be proud of what I am. I remember being asked by kids in my white granny's village when I was about 12: "Why is your skin brown?" It was an innocent question and I was well-equipped to deal with it. Once I'd told them why the conversation moved on to something else.

People are always curious about mixed origins and sometimes the "Where are you from?" questioners never seem to consider that one has to answer the question all the time, but hey, I don't mind talking about myself that much. Sometimes when I'm feeling mischievous I'll say: North West London, just to make them ask me what they really want to know.

Good luck emma187.

my ds is half Indian, a quarter jewish and a quarter Scottish/english.
He has brown hair which goes golden brown almost blonde in summer and olive skin. He looks maybe Italian or Spanish. Some people say, when I tell them his dad is of Indian origin, they wouldn't have guessed so.

I get asked where his dad is from all the time (I am quite pale) so sometimes I say London to be mischievous. It's actually true dh was born in London but I know that's not what they are asking.

My ds seems to have got a little darker in the last few months since Summer - he has the most gorgeous skin colour and people are always saying how lovely it is. I feel quite envious of his all year round 'tan'!

One time recently I had a lady ask if 'he had been in the sun a lot' in quite a disapproving way - he is only 17 months. When I told her he is half indian she looked suitably embarassed.

Hi , my family are I Irish I was born and brought up in London , I'm sometimes mistaken for Spanish or Portugese my dd father's family are from Jamaica ,my dd is quite pale but lovely huge brown eyes and red/brown hair with lovely curls , always get asked if her hair is dyed??? at 5 years old .....we live in a very mixed diverse part of NW London so never think about these things at all, unless we go to relatives or away from London for the day and get so many questions about where we are from, etc.

hi bubblez,Im guessing your dh is actually part mixed not actually black, in which if mixed with white a very pale almost white child is very possible.Many darker skinned mixed race people ( i.e. Mel B, bob marley) are often wrongly referred to as black remember- even by themselves sometimes.i suppose its a case of which race they identify themselves with?? I dont know im not mixed but 2 of my children are and they have mixed race cousins who all look so different.Your children do look typically mixed race to me, i'd never think they were white.Too many people cant see past that stereotypical portrayal of mixed race seen in the media. As time goes on we will see more and more children from mixed relationships , and an increase of mixed race adults having children with other mixed race adults,and then in time people will stop expecting the 'typical' stereotype! I hope!!