Would you be this frugal for two years for this endgame?

[pinkponie]

So dh and I were talking and we need a bigger property due to an unexpected third dc. We have a v small 3 bedroom flat but there’s 8 years in between dc 1&3 (dc2 is opposite gender and his box room is so tiny, getting a single bed in was a struggle). It wouldn’t be idea, for dc 1&3 to share long term as dc1 would be a teenager when dc3 is five. She will need her own space for stuff etc. I guess it could be done but our living areas were getting too small for 4, let alone 5. This property was only meant to be for a few years anyway (been here 3) but house prices shot up round here since then, it’s crazy. Even if ours went up at the same rate, we’d still be £200k+ behind actual houses and that’s for a three bed. We can’t currently afford that. Dh crunched the numbers and said that if we live on £850 a month for the next two years then we can save about £50k which would obviously be very helpful. This also means separately to that we could pay off our flat in two years. So our cash in bank to put towards a next property would be around £250k. We’re in Scotland which means that we’d need approx £40k for the offers over value (if you don’t know, basically up here if so etching is worth say £300k, you’d be
paying 10-20% over that out of pocket, you can’t mortgage that extra % as it’s over the value of the property).

So it’d be £250k we’d have but probably £200k for a deposit on a property after over value and solicitors fees etc. But it means that for anything post bills, we’d have £850 a month. This needs to include food, nappies, fuel (don’t use a lot of fuel to be fair). Any entertainment. We’d have already paid for kids clubs and streaming services as part of our bills, this is separate to the £850. We worked out that means we would have the money for one fun activity a month such as soft play/inflatable world etc. We do have lots of really good parks a short drive away although the weather is unpredictable at best . We currently spend about £350 each on the two older dc at Christmas but dh reckons we’d need to reign it in to closer to £200. Birthdays are about £200 each, so trying to get closer to £100 etc.

I guess I’m asking if it’s worth being frugal for two years with the dc at the ages that they are (9,7, baby) or if this will be too tight? We’ve also agreed that we will do a one week holiday abroad a year. I feel bad that Christmas and birthdays will be less as well as just day to day entertainment etc. Of course they won’t go without anything but it’ll be all clothes off Vinted kind of stuff (not slating it, both mine and baby’s wardrobes are 100% Vinted purchases). Would you do this or would it be too hard? Thank you for any replies.

I would, your living standards are important long term and it’s much easier to be frugal when the kids are little, I would probably not have an abroad holiday in these living circumstances either

If it was me and if you both committed to it 100% I would do this to establish myself in a long term home.

What I wouldn't do is enter into it half heartedly and it end up taking 5 years instead of 2.

Yes. Short term pain but the long term gain is huge. Just realised that some months something might come up and you can't save as much as you would have liked, so don't be too hard on yourself.

For me, £850 a month to live on seems very low, are you including all eg insurance, council tax etc?

For 2 years, yes I’d do that. Especially if your wages may go up during that time or you may get promotions? Your DC will be more thankful for separate bedrooms when they’re older I think.

I would too. It also shows your children the value in that kind of longer term project.

It sounds like you can have a good life even on your frugal budget - streaming services, one fun activity a month (look out for offers/deals like cinema tickets through your phone or banking app), no one going without too much. It’s going to benefit your family immensely long term so I would do it!

What bills does the £850 have to cover?

Yes. No brainier.

people lives like this for 100s of years. Without the soft play.

If you are both on the same page and have a contingency budget, I would do it.
Your DC are still small enough to be content with the park, movie night and cheaper clothes... once they hit secondary schools things will get a lot more expensive and you might find it impossible to save that kind of money.

Read the thread! She says this is after all bills and is to cover food, fuel and fun.

I would do this OP for the long term game. We survive on about £700 for the same things and it’s tight but works well if you plan and budget.

Good luck!

Yes!

I'd definitely forego the annual holiday abroad, that would save a small fortune, like £5,000 for a family of 5.

have you also looked a different areas to see if you can get more for your money.

Keep looking for the property because it could be you find something suitable / affordable sooner than you expect, or find something that the vendor is prepared to take an offer on.

No.

i had twins one boy one girl. They chose to share until quite old.

you can move the rooms around - so depending on ages, at the moment you presumably have you and partner in master, and dc have a room each.

first six months baby will be in with you.

after that get dc 1 and 2 to share and baby goes in smaller room.

once dc1 hits teen years and baby is older swop to dc1 gets room on their own and dc2 and 3 share.

850 after all bills and kids regular activities

have you properly accounted for yearly expenses like car tax and services ? Do the kids ever need extras like dance shows or away games ? Baby will benefit form swimming and a baby club of some sort and occasonal Soft play and farm trip -£20 a. Week ?

one tank £50 - but you should have taken that out already ad it’s predictable

food - piece of string but £500 should give you a good diet - what do you currently spend ?again I can’t understand why you haven’t already excluded food - are you hoping to make savings there or do you eat out loads now ? How much are nappies these days ?

leaves 300for ? With growing kids you will spend some on clothes and shoes for them. One takeaway and one fancy trip out or lots of cheaper trips with ice creams or sharing a round of chips between 2

Ditch haircuts , make up is your Christmas present what else do people spend money on

you need to know where it currently goes to know if it’s worth it for you

Yes of course you should. Two years is finite and achievable.

Saying that, two abroad holidays for five people in that time is insanity; have a week in a caravan and shorted it to 20 months or whatever.

It is unclear to me where the £900 (£100 birthday / £200 Christmas per kid) per year for gifts will come from. If it is out of the £850 then that is £75 per month gone already. Similarly an abroad holiday at say £4000 will be £330 per month, which I think makes the whole thing completely unaffordable.

How much do you spend on fuel? If both working from home then that's very different to commuting 100 miles a day.

I think it will be tight and you will need to be incredibly disciplined to avoid dipping into savings. I also think it will be more of a challenge if you are both working and time-poor. When I was a SAHP (for a decade) it was far far easier to keep to a budget as I had the time to do so without burning out. Now I'm working 4 days a week we have more takeaways, food delivery, last minute dashes to the shops for forgotten things etc. which all adds up.

holidays abroad will be expensive,
you can do without those surely

Definitely sounds like it's worth it. Also make sure you've reviewed all your costs to check they are as low as possible (broadband, insurance etc). Eat out and takeaways as little as possible as it's so expensive - loads cheaper to get nice ready made food from the supermarket if you want something a bit treaty without cooking.

For days out, look into memberships of places you like to go as sometimes much cheaper than paying the 'on the door' price.

For holidays, depending on how much you spend, that could possibly be cut a little too - instead of a week's beach holiday, how about a short break to Disneyland Paris or similar?

Also see what extra money you can make by selling things or swapping your bank account etc.

Weirdly I think two years is the perfect time- I think eg 5 years is just too much of your lifetime and you’d be fed up/ bitter/ arguing by the end of it

850 a month isn't that frugal. 200 for a primary school-aged child at Christmas is plenty. One holiday abroad a year is a luxury. It seems a really simple decision to me. Your DC, especially DC1, will be much happier having their own room, and the whole family will be more comfortable having a suitable home.

Yes I would, but I would also make it a shared challenge of best days out for free, who can make the most inexpensive meals mid week. Etc etc.
and ensure you have one family treat a quarter otherwise it can get miserable . Dont see it as saving as such… see it as a challenge of how frugal can you be. Ensure you tell friends and family or they may become unnecessarily judgmental

yes I would, it’s a total no brainer. If your calculations are correct, it’s not like you’re even going to need to be ridiculously frugal… £100 instead of £200 on birthday presents etc. TBH I wouldn’t even bother with holidays abroad or soft play and you can save even more.

This is a situation where the longer term goal is really important and will make a massive difference. With your age gaps, I also think it would be incredibly hard for a teenager to have to share a bedroom with a much younger sibling, the teenage years are when they really need some privacy and space.

it sounds very doable and a good decision.

I agree that it doesn't even sound that frugal, still quite a decent amount of none essentials within the budget.

This, How are your living costs so low? We are a family of 4 and our costs average £2k/month on bills, insurance, food etc. Food alone is £100/week. And our mortgage is paid off so I thought my costs would be lower than many!