Can't save- need ideas!

[7catsforthewin]

Hi there,

So a bit about our situation: we have a mortgage of £185k on a £400k house (worth more now).
Collectively my husband and I earn around £78k with me working part time. Have 2 kids aged 8 and 3 so £300 on nursery fees each month. We have pets so insurance, treatments etc amounts to £400 a month (two are very old!).
We have £10k in easy access savings account and children have £20k each in ISAs from inheritance but each month we just dip in and next month pay it back up!

I'm just not sure how we aren't able to save. We do two cheap UK holidays a year (one a long weekend). Food is extortionate especially feeding our two kids with multiple allergies.

Just feeling like a failure that we aren't able to save and so many of our peers go on multiple abroad holidays and seem to be able to save large amounts each month (we live in south east where many commute to London). I am thankful that my work means no after school or before school wrap around care is needed and we have no other debts apart from mortgage but I worry £10k can be wiped out very quickly.

Any tips???

write down everything before you spend it.
Stop spending it.

What is your take home income and your outgoings each month? It sounds like you’ve chosen the lifestyle you want with part time working, 2 holidays, and multiple expensive pets but don’t have a high income to be able to save as well. Which is fine if those things are what you want to prioritise, but on £78k you’re not likely to be able to do everything.

Choices.

I wouldn’t be paying for pet insurance for very old pets that are ill. I’m from a generation that did your best for them with what you could afford but PtS when the pain was too bad.

The way I approach saving is to have a fixed amount going automatically into a savings account each month before I pay for anything else. That way the saving is not discretionary. Decide what to put away, then set it up so it just happens. If you get to the end of the month and you've run out of money then you have to cut things (like pet insurance).

It sounds like you are the stage where finances are tight as you are paying out high amounts on situations that change. In the not too distant future your youngest will start school reducing childcare costs, that might also give you the opportunity to increase hours. It's horrible to say this as a pet owner and I have been there with a dog with a medical condition but those costs will also reduce. I would say you are budgeting tight for next 2 years but things should ease.

Stop paying pet insurance and put that amount into a savings account. Use it if you have to and if no need then its for your family.

£5000k per year on pets is insane! That invested would set you on the right track.
You need to do a proper budget of everything you spend. Do you have expensive phone contracts? Lots of subscriptions? Direct debits you have forgotten about? Go through everything with a fine tooth comb. What is this expensive food for allergies? Can you not get that on prescription?

Go through bank or card statements for last three months and note down any discretionary spending. This will let you understand what choices you are currently making so you can decide if you want to make different choices. It’s so easy to spend a lot of money on a load of small purchases that you don’t really register but they do add up quite quickly.

I’d try tracking expenses religiously for say 3 months if you can - you’ll be able to spot any frittering on things you don’t really care about.

Stuff people often aren’t getting great value from could be multiple TV subscriptions, expensive phone contracts for more data than they need, out of contract broadband, lots of top-up supermarket shops, buying new when secondhand would be just as good, gym you don’t use, frequent coffee and cake out - that sort of thing. If there’s an expense for something really important to you, I’d be slow to cut that - it’s more looking for things you wouldn’t miss or can easily do cheaper.

When our pet insurance two years ago increased to £180 a month for our 11 year old boxer we cancelled the insurance and put £200 a month into a savings account. We have accumulated over £2,000 and we also took out an interest free credit card to cover if we had/ have a shortfall. Perhaps cancel the insurances and put £200 a month into a savings account and get an interest free credit card in case you need to pay out vet bills.

Same

In wouldn’t spend £400 per month on my own health insurance/meds, so why would I spend it on my animals, particularly when money is tight.

This. We cancelled ours after last claim where we only got our premiums back. Shes 11+ now so when it’s too much it’s farewell time.
Do you buy lunches /coffee? Or eat out weekly?
If so cut that out. Do you drink? Ditto. Ahe the youngest goes to school you can save that £300. Not long now.

I'm a single mum on a tight budget.

• I cook from scratch,and don't buy brands except Lea & Perrins
• I turn the heating down a degree and wear thicker sweater/socks in the evenings.
• Parkrun rather than gym.
• Watch freeview, no subscriptions
• Take home-made lunch to work, leftovers or home made soup/bread.
• Don't eat out or buy coffee out
• Don't drink alcohol

Thanks everyone.

So 2 of our cats are only 10 and on petplan now are £103 a month so whilst not really old once over 10 it goes up so much! I have thought about scrapping all their insurances and putting £300 away a month but scared something awful would happen.

We have 3 subscriptions and 2 kids clubs. I will up my hours hopefully once youngest is in school 🤞but that's another 18 months away. Allergies wise it's insane- egg, legumes, enumbers, courgette, melon... It's a long list between them but it is what it is. I do lots of cooking from scratch but even that is expensive 😭
We buy clothes off vinted and our kids love free stuff like walks in woods and parks. My husband's gym membership means free swimming for kids which helps avoid swimming lesson costs.

I'm rambling just not sure how everyone seems to afford it all.

Absolutely everything everyone else has said.
Track your spending, cut down on treats and non essentials, reduce the amount of stuff you buy. Shop second hand if you actually need something. Cancel the pet insurance and have a good think if you're being kind by continuing whatever treatments they're having each month. Change how you holiday. Go to a uk holiday park once in the summer for example

What are your kids allergies? Cooking from scratch is cheaper than free from foods, which are rediculous in cost. There's decent and more affordable replacements for wheat flour and diary now. And since you work part time, you have time to batch cook and freeze snacks, bread, main meals etc

Did I read that you were borrowing from your kid's ISAs each month? That's doesn't sit well. If your lifestyle requires you to borrow from your children, you need to change your lifestyle.

Almost 5k per annum seems a large percentage of your income to spend on pets You don't mention your spreadsheet that keeps track of everything and you don't mention the last time you reviewed all your subscriptions.

Maybe look at a 12 month limited policy for your pets as they are older. Premiums are much cheaper than life long. I’ve just claimer for ddog to remove a tumour. I know we can’t claim again but to be honest if the cancer returns given his age we won’t put him through anymore. That said his insurance will renew in March and if premiums rocket I will cancel it altogether and put away a monthly amount.

No sorry that's written confusingly. Don't touch the ISAs and they can't until they are 18. I meant from our easily accessible savings!

If your username is correct, 7 cats is a lot.

You really need to do a full budget breakdown - but also, do you actually want to come to terms with what you spend? Most people who "can't save" are in denial. That sounds like a David Lloyd style gym, you could switch to Pure Gym + swimming lessons for the 8 year old. The 3 year old doesn't need them yet.

The MSE forum and Reddit's r/UKPersonalFinance will give you good factual advice, but you will have to give details on all expenditure. You Need A Budget is a good app to get you started.

You have to prioritise. For example if you're going to continue insuring and treating your cats you can't afford holidays. Or if you want 2 holidays, you can't afford your cats.

If you do a budget you'll be able to see where you spend your money and prioritise what is most important to you. But you can't have everything

I am not surprised you cant save with the cost of the pet insurance your paying out each month. I had no idea it was so much. I like animals but we have never had a pet as they are an expensive luxury. My parents have a dog because they are retired with plenty of disposable income.

On the plus side having £10K of savings and £20K for each child in an ISA is great at this point in your life.

Stop comparing yourself to others/the Jones's, they are likely broke or not paying out on pet insurance.

We have an annual spresadsheet for everything and record abslolutely ALL expenditure to see where all the money goes.

I want to say it gets easier but its just different ,as kids gets older they need different things and cost more.

You already have 50K in savings for you and your children, this is more than some people would ever be able to dream of saving in an entire lifetime.

Thanks everyone. Great ideas. I think we are going to cancel gym membership to start with. It isn't a super expensive one but because we are NHS workers our kids can go free.

Yes a lot of cats- it's my son's special interest (neurodivergent) and it has helped him so much in everyway. I will look into cancelling insurances and having sperate saving accounts for them too.

Kids snacks are so expensive and need to start making them home cooked (only thing I don't)

Just because it's his special interest doesn't mean you need MORE of them?
I say this as a committed cat lady, and well, as I'm an autistic adult cat sitter, they probably are my special interest too. I limited it to 2 cats though!

I think once you stop paying your nursery fees, you should be able to put a bit of that in the savings pot. Were in the same situation, 2 children gone through nursery 4 days a week. Almost at the end of it!