Avoid care home fees by divorcing!

[champchomp]

I know this sounds extreme but I’m thinking ahead. DH is a bit older than me and is having some health problems. We have no mortgage and he has a good pension and savings. I’ve seen instances where a spouse has entered a care home and the other one has struggled to pay the fees and had to sell up and use all the savings. Hypothetically speaking would divorcing and splitting assets protect some of the money and property. I know anything could happen between now and if my husband needs care but it worries me and we have children we would like to help financially if need be. I’d always be there for DH no matter what and visa versa. But financially does it make sense to financially separate/divorce if care is needed for either of us?

This doesn't work and is a bad idea for several reasons.

You can either care for him yourself or pay for his care.
Morally you should not try and avoid paying if
you want care for him; from what you are implying, you and your husband have already enjoyed a life more luxurious than most. Your husband can continue to do this if he uses his money to pay for decent care.
Pay your dues, just like everyone else.

Would you be happy putting your husband in a council funded care home? Depending on area some are not nice at all…

Get a care annuity if you’re worried. A lump sum and they’ll agree to cover his care for life. Of course, if he dies early there’s no refunds. That’s the wager.

OP just research lifetime interest trust wills

osborneslaw.com/blog/life-interest-trust/

basically does what I wrote above and won’t cost you more than £500 to put in place including mirror wills for both of you

this way you can at least be sure half of your house will go to your kids if one of you passes

People will do anything for money.

I’m guessing you are fortunate not to have had close experience of dealing with someone with dementia. Because when that person is a danger to themselves and you, you have little choice. People with dementia can be aggressive, they commonly refuse carers, they wander the street at night, leave the gas on . . . I could go on. I know someone who desperately wanted to keep their relative with dementia at home, and the relative died an entirely preventable death as a result of throwing herself down the stairs.

The local authority will expect your husband to manage for a considerable period with carers x 4 a day, (even if he lived alone with no-one to care for him). Only when you and your children are on completely on your knees with exhaustion and stress would they find him a place in a care home, and there are hardly any fully funded places, most still require a top up. Money buys you choice and control and if you have the money it is worth every single penny.

Why should we be penalised for earning and saving and wanting to leave money to our children. Whether you pay for care or the council you get the same care.

I very much doubt you get the same care. When there was a possibility that my mother might have to go into residential care, I went and look at some of the facilities that were being suggested. (My mother would have been eligible for fully funded care). I would NEVER have let my darling mum spend her final days in any of the dirty, smelly, depressing places I saw. Friends recommended some places to me but they were "outside the Council's budget".

My father passed away in his early 50's so sadly never reached old age. Fortunately my Mother and my Husband's parent's didn't pay ANY care home fees. This can be achieved. We promised them they would never have to leave their homes. We made it work - changed working hours, took career breaks, used holidays, lived apart with our respective parents when necessary, used their (minimal) savings to buy in additional care when needed. And no, this was out of love for our parents, not to protect some huge inheritance - that just about covered the funerals! You don't need always need State funded care even if you not wealthy. If can fund it or "do" it yourself, leave the State funding for those who really need it.

This. Where do all these arseholes trying to avoid care fees think the money is coming from?? FFS.

This is all a bit silly. You actually cannot be forced to sell your main home to pay for your spouses care. As long as you are living in it the value is disregarded and there is no need to pay for care. After the persons savings (their own savings in their name and half of any joint) go below the threshold the LA pay. So no need to divorce him or live separately you can still keep your house.

You don’t get the same standards of care either BTW. With social care it’s very much you get what you pay for (unlike private medicine in my controversial opinion). The best care homes often only take private funders as LA fees are so rock bottom they would not be able to provide good care with that amount.

@champchomp I don't think anyone has suggested the obvious solution. Just toddle off to Dignitas before you both become too ill. Quick sip of the drink, and it's all over. No need for care home fees, and the children get everything.

I know this sounds flippant, but it is what I plan to do. I don't want anyone having to watch me dribbling into a bowl out of some sense of loyalty, or sitting by my bedside watching me flailing as the morphine and medaz wear off.

Fortunately, I have good friends who suggested dressing me in a clown suit and dropping a piano on my head, but I pointed out that that would be INdignitas 😜

It’s not “taken” for care home fees - it’s used to pay for them by yourself

As others have said a shared residence is disregarded. You would also pay inheritance tax above a certain limit if you did divorce and then left assets to each other.

My parents put their home into a Trust to avoid care home fees & inheritance tax.

After my dad passed away, my mum moved & the new property was not placed in trust. The McClure’s scandal has been all over the news.

It was the best thing that happened. As when mum needed care, we could sell the house towards care & mum got the loveliest care home for the last months of her life. That was utterly priceless for us.

We looked at the council homes & they were absolutely awful. I couldn’t have bested for her to have spent her last days there.

I can’t understand how people wouldn’t want the best care.

House 50/50 as PPs have said, and then split savings into two in single names. Our parents did this then when DD went into a care home the financial assessment was done on his money alone. DMs was not considered. So each had their own money to fund any care required. As it happened DM died first and her will left her money to her children.

Of course you’re not the only ones and loads feel this way!

we’re a nations of scroungers, lack of prosperity meaning people with a job and a house suddenly consider themselves worthy of wealth protection as if they’re bill gates. We love to hate and are tight enough to peel an orange in our pocket whilst pursing our lips at the undeserving.

expect endless pots of money we pay next to nothing towards, rewarding our good health and good luck by spending our later years forcing the local authority to spend out on enforcement to get us to pay for our own housing or excitedly accepting inferior council house care because at least we didn’t pay for it.

Just for the record, roughly half of care homes in the UK have a mixture of self- funders and self-funded residents. The self-funders are subsidising the others in those homes.

I never understand how these care homes justify the astronomical fees they charge. They employ staff on near enough minimum wages and serve dreadful food.

'Til death do us part, eh, OP?

In my very recent direct experience, the good thing about paying £1500 per week for care is that I got to choose the very best.
It's gutting waiting goodbye to the inheritance, which would have been the price of a decent flat but thems the breaks. Dad died 25 years ago so couldn't just split the property or anything like that.

Agree with this. I absolutely pay taxes to protect your inheritance.

And the company makes a big profit and the banks providing the mortgage an even bigger one - that’s how and why

It's because they offer 24/7 care - although I'm not saying some aren't immoral profit mongerers - but not all

Get some sound financial advice. (I'm in a similar situation) I think there is a critical illness cover you can buy should he become unwell which will cover care home fees. I can't remember the exact term for it but definitely worth looking into. We have a financial advisor to support us