How to Issue Pocket Money

[KindOfKash]

Hi - trying to figure out the best ways to incentivise my kids to do things that are good for them consistently (i.e. exercise, healthy eating) - is it money or something else?? What works best for you and your kids?

Kash

Neither of those things have anything to do with you giving them money.

Surely eating is determined by what parents buy and cook for them (or, depending on age, what they cook, which will be based on what they have been used to eating).

Exercise, again is partly down to habit, partly to support given (getting them there; getting them the right equipment; supporting and encouraging them over the years), and partly to do with helping them find the sport, or other exercise they enjoy.

Pocketoney is generally given once a week for younger DC or once a month for older DC. You could offer incentives for helping around the home.

Three different issues you want to teach your children about - money management, eating healthily, regular exercise
Keep them separate and fun

Thanks guys!

yeah good point - at the moment I'm not really giving pocket money. but the thing is I also want a way to tie treating them to the good behaviour and choices they make.

like I have a child who's an athlete, that is also really into fashion and make-up etc. I don't mind getting her what she wants but I also don't want to spoil her - just figuring it out

We’ll sometimes incentivise them to push themselves - eg get below 15 mins for 3km and you can have £5.

And sometimes for chores.

As I’m with NatWest we use Rooster.

£5 for each good or excellent effort grade on term report.they also had to do Sunday washing up

We also use Rooster. I found cash a pitb because I tend to use cards.

I'll offer rewards for cleaning their rooms but I expect them to contribute in the kitchen and sorting washing

If I had my time again I wouldn’t ’give’ pocket money to the kids for doing chores. I would instil in them that as part of a household we all chip in as part of the family.
I’d give them an allowance tocspen on what they want but not pay them pocket money for jobs.
that would be a non negotiable part of living in the house.
also exercise and healthy eating would 100% not be something you bribe them to do with money. IMO

True true!! do you use any tools - I think my little one responds well to reward charts but my older two not as much. trying to strike a balance between rewarding and spoiling lol

I've tried Rooster - I find it pretty tricky to use. How do you set tasks on there?

agree with your sentiment here. I don't really want to bribe them with cash money per se - but I do want to be able to show recognition or kudos for them having a good go at doing things.

You are right - there is a danger of over rewarding for the basics - they are a bit messy and I want to not have to have the same conversation with them every other day - it much rather it be set in stone (e.g. you do this x amount of times you are more likely to see positive results, but iso you choose another path you won't get what you want)

interesting - is there anything outside of chores you would like your kids to do more of?

I also feel that paying them to do basic chores means that very soon everything becomes transactional. "I won't do x unless you pay me y". I'm not sure I want my children to be getting the message so young that all and every bit of effort must be rewarded with cash. How, will that set them up for the future?

Having said that some parents swear by this approach. Listen to Martin Lewis talking about his childhood - he, was given money for doing chores. Which he says instilled his understanding of the value of money and probably set him on the path to his very successful career!

So what do I know! But I think ML is possibly the exception.

Haha - true - perhaps a child by child approach. you might get some really money motivated people, whereas others are motivated by other things - thinking particularly as they get like to that 11-14 age bracket.

I suppose this is why the stickers on the sticker chart used to work so well with them when they were younger - the sticker could mean anything!!
Someone needs to invent the new sticker for teenagers. Maybe that's what the instagram/tiktok like has become for some (gulp)!

We have a split with chores and pocket money.

The kids get a basic amount of pocket money not associated with any chores.
They have a couple of set chores not associated with pocket money that they do simply as being part of the household (I'm uber strict on these and technology is removed if chores aren't done).

Then there are paid chores that they can choose to add on to their ones or not. Each has a value (it's a faff to set up buy once it's done it's worth it) and they can add one a set amount of chores time wise. When they take them on they commit to them for four weeks.

It means when they're saving for something they can earn more or if they have a lazy week they can see that they have less money.

I really wish they'd keep their rooms tidy. And that's the one thing I offer extra cash for.

Other stuff like helping in the kitchen i just expect them to do. Same with laundry.

I know someone who offers extra money for instrument practice but I see that as if you want me to keep paying for lessons you better keep practicing.

See that was my fear to that paying them to help around the house would become "I'm not emptying the dishwasher unless you pay me"

For some daft reason my youngest loves sorting socks. He started doing it when he was about 3!

This is what we did. DD gets pocket money, her age in pounds per fortnight. Always has. Teaches her budgeting. It has worked.

Separately, she has jobs around the house. What we say is, “it’s the cost of being in a family”. At 14, that’s laundry, cooking, washing up, clearing away, shared with everyone. She is very responsible and hard-working.

If you tie money and jobs together at home, and they aren’t money-motivated, they won’t do it.

It's only very recently my oldest 14 has become money motivated. He's eyeing up a ridiculously expensive lego set, that retires this year.

I like that! Hybrid model!!

🤣🤣🤣 luckily my kids are really into their extra curricular. It’s more the curricular I think they need extra motivation for.

that and taking their sh*t out their mum’s car!

Good point. So the routine itself is based more on responsibility and sense of duty more so then money. Does she get any kind of reward for that at all (doesn’t need to be monetary)?

it happened a bit early for mine. What is he going to have to do to earn the money?

my brother and I used to do that. It’s like a puzzle. What about the things he doesn’t usually like doing but kind of has to?