How to Issue Pocket Money

[KindOfKash]

Hi - trying to figure out the best ways to incentivise my kids to do things that are good for them consistently (i.e. exercise, healthy eating) - is it money or something else?? What works best for you and your kids?

Kash

For context. I never grew up having a set pocket money routine so I naturally find it hard knowing what to give for what.

though I always remember my mum ripping me and my brother a new one every other Saturday for camping in our rooms and not helping out with the housework

are they automatic with doing the required chores yet or do they need reminding?

Never given pocket money, and especially not for chores!

They do get money or a shopping trip or whatever for good results at school or a hobby. Or for being a great dc:)

Apparently their friends get money - sometimes £50- £100 a month for doing nothing.

Dc have had Saturday jobs, which get knocked on head for big exam revision. They baby sit, garden, paint fences for neighbours. They volunteer through hobbies. They know I am not a money tree.

That’s really good. Sound like a hard working batch. You should be proud!

Their friends are living lavish aren’t they!?

When she was young, motivation was a high five

Now it’s deep psychological stuff. She’s proud of herself when she does her chores and specifically proud she knows how to cook and clean when so many of her peers don’t. There’s a lot of frankly manipulation. “MUUUUUM I don’t want to wash up” “I know love, but it’s my job to make sure you dn’t turn into that flatmate everyone hates” We laugh, she washes up. DH sometimes ‘steals’ her job and I say “urg, Daddy is babying you thinking you won’t do it, yuk” so next time she tries to do it quickly. She loves cooking with me, it’s just time to hang out.

She’s still very parent-focused though, we’re really close. When she turns into a peer-focused, avoidant teenager, I don’t know how it will go. I was a horrible teenager with an awful relationship with my parents so I’ve worked hard on a close, respectful bond.

I had jobs that I was nagged and pressured and bribed into, while my mum was miserable about them. It was awful.

Depends what that £100 is meant to cover, some teens will be buying their own lunches from that allowance or their own clothes.

I gave pocket money weekly and then monthly, it wasn’t linked to chores. I then did a cash reward per GCSE grade that was individualised for each DC to encourage them in subjects they found difficult. At 16 when they were studying for A levels they all got part time jobs off their own backs without me mentioning them getting one. Now they are 20’s and 30’s and really good with money. They have a healthy attitude to saving, spending and working hard.