Inheritance/unreliable husband

[PrincessLeia21]

I have a question- here’s the background.
Im an only child. My mother died recently and my dad has had some health issues and wants to sort out his will.
i would be the sole beneficiary of a property and contents valued at about £800k conservatively.
my husband cheated a year or so ago. We have stayed together but I am not convinced we will long term.
rhe thought of me inheriting this property and having to give half to him is not appealing.
we have consulted a lawyer who suggested a trust but once I’ve inherited, in order to sell the property for my benefit, the trust will have to be dissolved- and the proceeds would once again be considered marital assets in the case of divorce.
has anyone else experienced this? Any ideas to get round it? Or will I have to divorce now in order to protect myself?

You don't necessarily need to end the relationship either if you divorce. Tell him your trust is broken and this is the only way you could continue if you are not yet ready to leave him.

I'd divorce him now. You can't trust him. I wouldn't want to see him sailing off into the sunset with another woman and half of my dad's money.

Divorce him

Yes we rent.

There is no way on this earth I'd give someone who'd cheated on me and who I couldn't trust my father's money. No way. I'd divorce him now rather than waiting if your poor dad is so unwell.

or how about don't be unfaithful in a relationship to begin with ?

If you do divorce him before any inheritance, be sure to get a 'clean break' financial settlement so that he can not come back for a share of any money you may receive in the future.

As I said before, I would start divorce proceedings asap (whilst there is no inheritance to factor in to the equation). Whilst there is less in the marital pot, the financial settlement will be much easier and less costly to negotiate.

Once you receive any inheritance, you may end up with a protracted negotiation involving solicitors, court, barristers that will eat into any money that you get.

Ignore what he says. He’s a proven liar.

I will tell you now that if you divorce, he will not walk away from your inheritance when it’s the only thing between him and sofa surfing. He will be instructing a solicitor to pursue you for as much as he can get.

Divorce him now and do 50/50 based on current assets. As the property isn’t yours yet there is nothing to claim. Then put into trust and don’t sell for whatever your timeframe your solicitor recommends.

Divorce him, but you can still live as man and wife if you like.

Tell him that because he cheated, you want to know you can walk away from him easiest any point in the future if he does it again, so whilst you are happy to live with him for the time being (if you are) you want to be legally separated.

Your children won't even have to know, nor will anyone else if you don't want them to.

This means if he cheats, you can walk away easier. If he wants you as his partner, he's likely to be fairer about the divorce split of assets and if your dad dies, your DH doesn't get any of the inheritance.

If your H doesn't agree to the divorce, then I'd be wondering if he has his eyes on the inheritance/ is considering cheating again, because nothing else would change for him if he's faithful.

He says he wants none of your inheritance? 😂😂

A man who cheated on you and doesn't have a pot to piss in?
Not even a home of his own?
Get the ball rolling now OP.
He will take you for every last penny. 💐

Get divorced before you inherit otherwise it will likely form part of the divorce settlement

Yes. Absolutely.

There was an almost identical thread last week but the parent had just died. Husband walked out.

Divorce.

Never, ever underestimate what a disrespectful hsband will do.

Spot on

NO doubt about it.

I think it’s a pretty good idea to do.
I dint think inheritance, which have nothing to do with has built as a couple, should be part of divorce proceeding.
Which is also why they’re not always taken into account (eg when they’ve always been kept separate etc….)

@PrincessLeia21 id divorce now.
It’s just the inheritance. But you don’t trust him. You dint see a life with him. Dint drag it out.

Leave.
Even more so now knowing all the ba kground around finances and the age of your ds.

Start divorce proceedings immediately. The longer any inheritance comes after separation the less likely it is to be counted as part of the pot. So the sooner you do it the better, particularly in circumstances where you don't think (entirely understandably) you'll last in the long term.

Could he leave the house in trust for your kids, with a lifetime interest for you - so you can live there (but cannot sell it etc). That way at least you'd have somewhere to live, and he couldn't touch it.
Edited to add: could a proviso be added to this trust such that if the kids choose to sell, they have to provide an alternative property for which you have lifetime interest. (Say one wants to buy elsewhere with a partner and needs the lump sum from their share)

Of course he wants an entente cordiale! He’s piss poor and you’re going to inherit sooner rather than later. He is taking you for a fool.

Your father and mother presumably worked hard for that money and won’t want this guy spending a significant portion of it, some of which will be used trying to impress a woman no doubt.

Put your hard hat on. Protect your future and that of your kids. Get rid asap.

Morbid, but if you die first and he remarries, adios inheritance for DCs.

Just seen that you rent. I would honestly start divorce proceedings today. Your marital assets will be your inheritance.

This sounds horrible, I know, but I would put good money on your entente cordiale breaking down when the £800 000 hits your account. No man with nothing in his wallet won't have his eye on that.

Get divorced now.

The trust idea could work if you don't want to dissolve it and pass that on to any children you have. But I think if you have a trust you may do worse in a divorce if he argues you have access to money he doesn't so he needs a bigger chunk in the divorce. Best to divorce before that money is involved

Ltb. He is staying with you for your inheritance.. He has checked out of your relationship.. That's why he cheated. Your df would surely want you to have all of your inheritance?

I thought inheritances weren't counted as marital assets in the UK?