2nd home stamp duty - how do we as a couple deal with this when I'm responsible?

[freehugs6]

I would welcome people's thoughts on this situation I am currently in. Myself and my partner are looking at purchasing a property together but it feels very complicated with a 2nd home stamp duty issue.

I have owned a property on my own since August 2023. He has sold his house which is due to complete in July. He lives with me (and has a daughter age 10 who stays with us regularly).

We would like to buy a property together because we are struggling for space. One issue arising from this is that I haven't owned my property for a year, I do not want to sell so early into its ownership and will be liable for second home stamp duty.

In simple terms, this is the situation:

1. I will remortgage my property to give me £80k in total (£40k from remortgage) to contribute towards a deposit / legal fees / stamp duty
2. He will also contribute £80k towards deposit / legal fees / stamp duty
3. He earns £140k, I earn £54k. I am aiming to pay half the mortgage on the new property.

He has said that based on our deposit contributions, he will own 60% of the property, and I will own 40%, because £20k of my contribution is 2nd home stamp duty.

I am not sure how I feel about the 60/40 split. I am trying to see things from his perspective but I am not ready to sell my home after such a short space of time which has put me in this difficult situation whereby I feel that I have to purchase another property and contribute to the stamp duty. If it were just the two of us there wouldn't be an issue around space and my home would be adequate. I am also taking out additional mortgage debt to finance the stamp duty.

An option I had thought about was that if we were to split and sell the property, the first £20k (being the 2nd home stamp duty) would go to him, with a 50/50 split on the rest of the sale proceeds. I'm not sure this is fair to him either, but can't quite get my head around it.

Thoughts please forum! Thanks in advance.

Why would you buy a house with someone you've only dated for 18 months? How soon did he move into yours?

He sounds like just another man who eyes up a solvent woman to bleed her dry - and he's not even hiding it that well.

Live apart and date. Keep your house. Let him house and look after his own daughter (he can afford it). Personally I would ditch him, he's underhand and sly.

It sounds as if he has conditioned/trained you to feel as if any problem is automatically your fault OP?
In the thread title you say that you are responsible (for the stamp duty issue) but it is due to HIS responsibilities (to his child) that there is a need to look for a new home.
Presumably it was his choice to move into your home, and he did it knowing that there would be a lack of space due to his responsibility towards his child. I'm wondering if he has a long term plan whereby his daughter moves in full time and her day to day care becomes your responsibility (he'll be expecting you not to resist this because he's conditioned you to feel as if all problems are your fault)
It then falls to you to take time off work to care for her etc, your career & earning potential suffers while his soars.

You only need a bigger house because of his daughter yet he wants to screw you over with a smaller percentage of the new home. He’s got a bloody cheek. He’s doing nicely moving in with you and you putting up his daughter on access days. Don’t give up your house.

What kind of partnership is this? With my married home, I paid the deposit from the sale of my house but he paid the mortgage. We owned it 50/50.

Echo everyone else - it is too soon to buy together (even leaving aside the unjust financial split).

Stay in your flat that you have only just bought. Let him buy a two bed for him and his DD. Visit, for the most part, when she is with her mum. Take stock in a year.

This is too much change at once.

I don't know where you live, but him paying rent as half your mortgage and bills seems a bit of a bargain. Who pays for maintenance such as broken boilers? Is the rent a fair market value for a room in the area, especially considering you are housing his DD for part of the time? What would you get on spare room.com?

Agree with @Changingplace- you bought on your own last year, because you didn't know how things were going to develop. Less than a year later you think it's progressed enough to buy together- how much has he contributed in the last 7 months to your house? Earning 3x your wage and demanding the higher split- he's being a dick.

PS but if you do buy, of course you own 50:50 if you are paying the mortgage 50:50. You might ringfence your deposits separately but it’s not entrenched for ever more.

So on 54k you'll be paying 100% of your own mortgage and 50% of your joint mortgage - 1.5 mortgages?! Let me guess, he has suggested that you go to interest only repayments on your own property but is hoping to pay off the one he has a share in?

The 50:50 split on the mortgage: I wouldn't do this with a partner, we would contribute in proportion to our incomes. And be joint tenants. I couldn't be doing sharing my life with someone who would try to walk away with more than 50% of our joint property. But if you want to contribute 50%, that's up to you.

I think a 50/50 split on the deposit is more reasonable, but it depends on all sorts of financial details.

Ultimately, it does not sound like a good idea to buy a property with this guy, he is screwing you over in all sorts of ways. Let him buy a property for him and his daughter, continue to live in your own place, and if you're really desperate to continue a relationship with him, go slowly.

He can buy his own property to house him and his daughter. Then when you are both in a position to want to do things on a 50 50 basis you both sell up and do so

I think this is unanimous. I agree with all the rest. This is not in your interests.

This. 100%. He clearly is looking out for his own interests only. Steer well clear before you get entangled in something much more complicated.

Right...so he is earning near on 3x as much as you yet happy for you to still pay half 🤨

Presuming you are not married and are partners with separate finances,

I think he is right that, based on the deposit amounts, you should be tenants in common with a 60/40 split.

I don’t think you should pay 50% of the mortgage though as you earn less, the mortgage payments should be split 60/40 as well.

The fact that you are releasing equity from your current property to finance the deposit isn’t anything he owes you for. That is your choice.

Another option is you don’t remortgage and you don’t put in a deposit, but only pay the £ in home stamp duty difference (2nd home stamp duty minus the usual stamp duty).

You then both pay the mortgage based on your relative incomes which would be a 72/28 split and you’d be tenants in common with the 72/28 split to be paid after his £80k initial deposit is refunded to him.

Editing to add, you keep your current home as sole owner and pay the mortgage from rental income by renting it out.

Editing to add, you keep your current home as sole owner and pay the mortgage from rental income by renting it out.

OP is unlikely to be able to convert to a buy to let mortgage

The vast majority of lenders would provide Consent to Let for a limited period, but I’m not sure that’s the answer anyway

He sounds horrible. Get a deed of trust if you don’t just agree to keep living separately.

However, you don’t pay second home stamp duty if you’re buying a main residence I don’t think.