Which would you financially prioritise?

[Newbie1011]

If you had a substantial savings pot (or the potential to create one by the time you would need it) which of these would you / do you prioritise?

• savings for you and your partner to have a comfortable retirement
• private schooling for your children (if this would eat up your savings and make helping your children later on difficult)
• No private schooling but help for your children while at university and possibly a contribution towards a house deposit for them

It feels to me like if we save as much as I hope to in the next ten years or so, we might be fortunate enough that we could afford one of these things - but not more than that - and I’m curious as to what people would prioritise.

I would save for retirement with the possibility of using some of that to help dc in the future.

I would (and we did) do the third option

A. And if I could then afford to help out children I would.

But I don't fancy a miserable, poverty stricken retirement (which is currently what I'm likely to have). DC will make their own way in the world and I'll help where I can, but at the moment I'm trying to put some savings aside so we can afford to occasionally have the heating on when we retire.

A mixture of A and C, if possible.

retirement

I'd put back enough so that I wouldn't be poverty sticken in retirement and I'd try to help kids out with a tutor if they needed it for a few months before their exams. Definitely not independent school fees. I'd let them live home rent free whilst they saved for deposit.

I’d want to have enough money that I could make up the difference between the maximum student loan and what the kids would actually get, then prioritise retirement, then anything else.

A.

Put it this way, would you want your parents to sacrifice any chance of decent retirement to give you a leg up?

A, then C, then a bit more A.

I’d have to be so rich it didn’t impact anything else to do B.

A and potentially C, because I do think that kids grow up best when not handed everything on a platter.

Retirement, then kids future then private school if the other two things were already secured.

Yes my dc are at state school. That means we have been able to support expensive hobbies, an English tutor and three holidays a year. We are also mortgage free and saving for retirement. That means we anticipate being able to support them in staying with us to save a deposit. I would never consider paying school fees if it left us in a precarious position in old age.

A

Help yourself first, then your children if you can. It sounds selfish at first, but it makes financial sense - pay in as much as you can as early as you can to your pensions, then let compounding work it's magic.

A and C. With the hopes of saving later on for DGC university and house deposit, as my DParents did so for our DC, meaning DS is able to buy a significantly nicer house in a better area than he would otherwise have been able to.

Retirement definitely

No private schooling but help for your children while at university and possibly a contribution towards a house deposit for them

A mix of A and C depending on actual amounts and need. Eg if you saved £50k I’d prioritise retirement. If it was £200k id split 50/50 between retirement and DC. This is assuming you have ok pensions and it’s just extra retirement spending.

We're going for B but comfortable with what A looks like although very aware that it would look a lot better if school fees weren't a thing. So many factors need to be thought about. Private school wasn't in our plans until the last year so we've had to rethink things. Thankfully because we're mid 40s our retirement pots aren't looking too bad.

Retirement. Because your children want your time not your money and a happy healthy retirement for you will be fit you and them most

A then C. B would be my last option only if both A and C were fulfilled.

A . If a lot of cash A and C.

B
No doubt

We ended up doing B. Moved to the UK with some savings behind us, saved into ISAs initially with the idea that they would substitute for a late start to pension savings. Bought a house, started a family, moved house, decided we liked the look of a local private school for our eldest and "ought" to be ok for the fees. A few years down the line I'd fallen out of earning with mental health difficulties, but our children had ended up on chorister bursaries. Gradually dipped into the ISAs to help with fees. For senior school both had scholarship/bursary combinations that were, appropriately, predicated on us using up our savings along the way.

We are now in the extremely fortunate position of having an "early inheritance" from my mother downsizing which, age 50, we are using to rebuild ISA savings and establish a pension for me. Without it we would have been ok supporting our children at uni and starting to rebuild savings; I still only work part-time self-employed but my income is improving.

I do not regret prioritising my children's education one bit, the particular opportunities they have had have been so worthwhile (sure they could have got good grades anywhere, that wasn't what we were looking for.) I'm currently happy with the idea of working another 20 years doing what I do, especially as there are ways it can flex in the future.

We are also making small donations back to the schools that supported our children, and hope in time to increase these significantly towards their bursary funds that are so important to making their opportunities accessible to more children.

I have a generous pension so not worried about A. I also have savings.

B: I'm not a great fan of private education and DD has acheived much in state school so not worried about that.

C: This is the most probable option. I don't want DD leaving Uni with an insurmountable pile of debt. I'd like to be able to help her reduce her liability and one day 🤞 be able to buy ger own house. That's my aim, anyway.

This is so helpful and interesting. You all agree with my DH that A is the priority and that C is better than B! I have had a bit of a wobble lately after looking at our local state school options, that’s the problem. I’m worried my eldest will end up somewhere where she will lose her love of school and of learning and it would break my heart. But my DH had it tougher than me and he thinks they need to have a bit of adversity (!) and that we will be better placed to help them if we focus on safeguarding our own financial future. He is very keen to do A and hope that we can also do C when the time comes…. Deep down I know that makes most sense but there is an (over optimistic probably) part of me that wonders whether we could do B and then rebuild our savings enough ahead of retirement to do a combo of A and C.