You aren't quite getting it.
As the parent of a disabled person, it's about who has the responsibility to look after that disabled person - not the money per se.
If you are assessed as needing care but having to pay for it, it is your responsibility to pay. If you don't pay, you don't get.
This is inequitable in as much as it fails to account for the fact that just because you are more wealthy, you aren't necessarily more competent.
My fear for my son is that, having set him up in the benefits system as he was unable to do that himself, if he loses that entitlement for paid-fir care, he doesn't have the ability to subsequently advocate for his own needs to reapply - or even to remember to pay, set up a direct debit yo pay for care etc.
There needs to be a much more intelligent analysis of people's needs (beyond competency as well - as a clever person you might say my son has competency, but as a profoundly autistic person he can't interact enough in order to fulfill that competency). That allocates some people as "obligate care needers" regardless of funding, or does a sort of PAYE debit, and that checks when a person's funds fall below the limit and automatically restarts paying them or something.
If that were in place I wouldn't mind him not getting money from the government, but I do very much mind people assuming that not needing money from the government means he doesn't need proactive care, even if he can't ask for it.