Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Money matters

Find financial and money-saving discussions including debt and pension chat on our Money forum. If you're looking for ways to make your money to go further, sign up to our Moneysaver emails here.

Original poster

going on holiday whilst in debt

154 replies

thewearyone · 03/09/2023 22:28

Hi,

Me and dh has our lightbulb moment in July 2020 and realised that our debt was totally out of control. We set ourselves a target to be debt free by July 2026 - 5 years.

We have been so disciplined and have made great progress. We have paid off 36K in 3 years. We haven't once used a credit card, store card etc and this has become our new norm. We have also been able to build an emergency saving fund.

Next year a very close family member has a 'big birthday' and has invited us to join them on a special holiday. It will cost us 4K. We have settled for UK camping trips since starting our debt free mission and the plan was that we would not go abroad until is was all paid off.

I desperately want to go on this holiday. I have spoken to my dad about it ( he is going on the holiday) and he has offered to pay our 4K for now and then we will repay it when all of other debt is cleared. I am so tempted to do this.

would it be awful of us to do this?

OP posts:
Wildwildwoman · 04/09/2023 08:25

Is your DH in agreement or if you went in this holiday for your family big birthday would he feel.justtified in getting something for him if that makes sense?

thdskdrggs · 04/09/2023 08:28

My main concern would be is it as special for your DH? I'm all for living in the moment, I wouldn't punish myself for 5 years if I had a plan and was on top of it, you don't get these years back, BUT £4K is a lot for someone else's birthday. Is it a destination you're really keen to go to yourself? How does your DH feel about breaking the frugality for this holiday? Would you do it for his family?

Funkyblues101 · 04/09/2023 08:38

No way. £4k is a huge amount to spend on a holiday, even if you aren't already in debt. Camping is so much more fun and financially guilt-free. Why would you put another £4k burden on your shoulders which already have another 3 years of debt on them?

ZadocPDederick · 04/09/2023 08:38

£4K is a lot to spend on any holiday, and the chances are there would be quite a lot of extras. Are you really going to enjoy it, bearing in mind that it probably means another year of scrimping and saving to pay it off?

Changes17 · 04/09/2023 08:49

I would go. You could borrow the money from your dad to pay for the trip then over the next however many months reduce the debt repayments by the amount it takes to pay it off before going away.

Then you wouldn’t feel that you had dropped your good habits and potentially give up on the whole thing. If you’ve maintained it for three years you’ve done really well and you’re more than halfway. Special occasions like this really might never happen again.

PureAmazonian · 04/09/2023 08:50

I didn't even spend half of that on my honeymoon, because I know my financial situation and knew I couldn't afford it, let alone spending that to celebrate someone else's birthday.
Keep up the good work on paying your debts, don't rack up more.

Changes17 · 04/09/2023 08:51

Or you go to this one if it could cost less for one, then your dh could do a thing that’s special for him.

Flopsythebunny · 04/09/2023 08:52

dearanon · 03/09/2023 23:07

I would go on holiday.

That attitude to debt is why the op got into the mess she's in

marshmallowfinder · 04/09/2023 08:55

Goodness, no. I wouldn't do it just for a birthday. They'll be back before you know it and it'll all be forgotten. 4k is a HUGE sum of money. It will set you right back. It actually sounds well OTT anyway.

LizzieSiddal · 04/09/2023 08:56

If it was up to 2K, I’d say go for it but 4K is far too much when you’ve still got so much debt to pay off.

morelippy · 04/09/2023 08:59

Those holidays are for when you have no debt and a good amount of savings. Then you can afford them.

You're doing great OP. Just not yet.

Sunsnet · 04/09/2023 09:02

I wouldn't undo my work like that, especially not to go on someone else's expensive holiday. If I spend £4k on a holiday (only ever done this once) I want it to be all about what I want to do, not a relative's birthday. You also have the problem of owing your dad. What if your and/or his circumstances change, how long is he willing to wait for you to repay him?

Wait until you're debt free and have £10k+ saved, then take a holiday.

itsmyp4rty · 04/09/2023 09:05

I definitely wouldn't spend 4k to go on this holiday. But can you go but do it much more cheaply? Get cheap flights, stay in a cheap airbnb with cooking facilities, use public transport etc? I mean if it's Disney or something then it's probably not going to work, but might be worth thinking about.

PetiteNasturtium · 04/09/2023 09:07

Who is going on the holiday? I know you mention your Dad but really consider the dynamics of it. Personally I think stick to your plan and don’t go a further 4k in debt.

PRAMtran · 04/09/2023 09:10

Don’t go, if they’re close you probably see them all the time anyway. Once you’ve got no debt and 4k in your holiday fund you can have fun planning a holiday. If it was the right thing to splurge 4k you don’t actually have you wouldn’t be asking on here. Plus I imagine your dad will want his 4k back and a debt which isn’t paid back promptly can cause bad feelings

Akire · 04/09/2023 09:17

Is that the total holiday cost? Or does everyone need new passports, new luggage and whole new holiday wardrobes. Will there be hotel and other travelling to airport costs?

Can you earn some extra money in next year so pay half of it first then borrow the rest of your Dad?

What was main debt reason? If it was being a spendoholic then it could push you back into bad habits.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 04/09/2023 09:22

I couldn't justify £4k on a holiday (probably £5k when you count in extra costs) if I were in debt and part way through a long repayment plan.

CoteDOpale · 04/09/2023 09:28

WGACA · 03/09/2023 22:56

I wouldn’t put a holiday on a credit card in a million years. You’ll still be paying it back years later when you’ll barely be able to remember it.

Another one who doesn’t read. She’s not putting it on a card, Mumsnetter.

Call outs are going well.

ruffler45 · 04/09/2023 09:29

A few days holiday which will cost you 4 months to pay back at your current rate of debt reduction, just not worth it, and if your circumstances change in the meantime or the near future you will really regret it,

808KateO · 04/09/2023 09:35

Overthebow · 04/09/2023 06:22

You can’t afford it. Holidays are luxuries and you still have a huge amount of debt to pay off.

She's paid off 36k in only 3 years. She can afford it.

toomuchlaundry · 04/09/2023 09:43

If you have to get into debt for something (whilst you still have other debt to pay off) you really can’t afford it @808KateO

NoTouch · 04/09/2023 09:45

Personally I wouldn't be spending £4k of someone elses money and increasing already substantial debt for a luxury. It just wouldn't sit right with my conscience to use someone eles money and goodwill in this frivolous way when it had been caused by the same frivolous behaviour on my part. My priority would be paying off debt and having a savings cushion/rainy day fund.

But different people have different attitudes to debt, savings and living within their means. You need to reflect on yours and how it got you got into this mess in the first place. If you are happy with your attitude and the inherent risks, you dad is also fully informed of your financial position and he might not see his money for several years, then make the decisions you feel comfortable with taking ownership of and don't go crying to anyone else if the risks materialise.

EmmaPaella · 04/09/2023 09:51

It depends where it is and whether DH will also see this as a holiday if a lifetime? My DH would not see a holiday with my family as one!

In the yolo camp in theory, but (as a result) got myself into lots of debt when younger so I am on the fence.

EmmaPaella · 04/09/2023 09:51

It won’t be just £4K either, how much will you need to spend when there?

Sunsnet · 04/09/2023 09:54

808KateO · 04/09/2023 09:35

She's paid off 36k in only 3 years. She can afford it.

Show quote history

If you have to borrow money to pay for something you can't afford it.