Earn 40k single parent and struggling

[Noncomplyturkey]

Never thought I would get to 47 be earning 40k and struggling financially, I’m JUST getting by, before you ask I don’t live an extravagant life, no flash card or holidays, just two teenage sons with a £1k a month mortgage and regular bills. I have no idea how others in similar circumstances that earn less are managing. My monthly outgoings have gone up by over £300 due to increased int mortgage rates, food, petrol, energy. Child maintenance is due to finish in September too as my twins go to uni (fingers crossed). I’m going to have to get a second evening job, anyone got any suggestions or miracles?

It’s so tough. But why is your child maintenance ending if your children are going to uni? I thought that meant it continued until uni completed.

I am also a single parent, I’ve a good income but I really stress about money. I think you’re doing great to have a mortgage, you’ll own your home outright as some point and you’ve got your children though school. You are doing very well! But it really does feel relentless at the moment.

Do you actually want suggestions or do you just want a moan and validation that things are difficult? (Which is fine). If it's the former you need to post your monthly/annual budget for people to scrutinise and offer advice

The annoying but obvious answer to these things is some version of -

1. Reduce outgoings
2. Increase incomings

This board is packed with ideas about how to do the first in terms of reducing bills groceries meal planning and various other tips and tricks. i’m sure people will be along soon to advise you on all of this or to link to previous trades or to give advice on managing your budget better with budget planning apps or budgeting bank accounts and taking stock of everything you spend

however the second one that is increasing your income is likely to be the much more long-term and feasible way of improving your situation. Is there a realistic way you could do this. There are various and £10 a day type of threads on this board for little bit of money here and there but is there a way you could significantly upscale yourself by earning free qualifications and things like Coursera or Udemy or so to upscale and re-market yourself and go for a higher paying job that brings in a better salary ?

Upscale was meant to be UPSKILL.
Doh!

I was under the impression that the maintenance that my x pays for the boys would finish in September, my ex told me that …tbh I’ve not questioned that….I will double check with CMS

Thankyou for your suggestions I’m new to MN so will check out other threads to see suggestions on those, I do check Martin Lewis site to review outgoings/bills regularly, I need to scrutinize further thou for sure

Child maintenance does stop when children go to uni.
Hopefully your ex may still continue to support the children in some way (but I'd expect the money to go directly to them).

Yes I’ve just checked this out, it stops in September. I’m definitely going to help my sons out financial even if it gets me in debt, and hoping their dad will help them out too

I was about to post similar. Nearly 3 grand a month coming in and you are 'struggling'?

Bin off Sky, Netflix etc
Get a sim only deal for your phone. I have unlimited calls and texts and 3gb data for £4.95 a month with talkmobile.
Stop with the Costa coffee Subway sarnies
Take in a lodger
Do online surveys etc in your spare time
Go through your bank statement and cancel any direct debits you dont need anymore.
Same goes for any ongoing subscriptions
Shop at Aldi / Lidl / Home Bargains / B&M Stores. Always good deals on branded items there.

Some really good suggestions.

The biggest cost we all have is housing. With teenagers nearly leaving home, could you opt to downsize your home to something more affordable?

I mean obv ditching the Costa coffee will help in the short term, but in the long term it's the larger ticket items that make the most difference.

You will honestly save a lot when dc are not living at home - food, energy, petrol, clothes, school expenses. I can give my dc quite a bit of help on similar take home with what I save when they are at uni.

40k is not 3k a month....after tax NI pension that would be closer to 2.2k take home

If you use Martin Lewis website have you used his budget calculator? Have you sat down with a budget to look at where your money actually goes?

And then looked at what is priority, what is need, what is want and where you can cut back. If you haven't already done this, it can be quite a surprise as to where the money is disappearing.

£40k might seem like a lot but with 3 adults in the house and £1000 for the mortgage, it's not.

I understand your struggles. I'm a single mum. It pisses me off when people complain they're short of money because they earn less, whilst completely forgetting they have 2 incomes coming into the house that add up to significantly more. The increased cost for fuel, energy, food isn't something anyone can swallow easily when they were only just covering costs previously.

This is a very good point and something I keep trying to estimate how much monthly costs will reduce when they go to uni, I’ve told them I will pay for their uni canteen/food card and towards essential expenses but they know they need to get a part time job as soon as they get to uni

I hear you totally!!

I’d consider getting a lodger or two when the kids go off to uni.you can rent out a room Mon- Fri short term that way kids can still visit at weekends and holidays. First five grand or so is tax free too.

The OP does not make it clear if the 40k is gross or net.

£1k mortgage is an awful lot. If you are not already in a 2 bed I would look to move to one asap. Even a one bed with a sofa bed in the lounge for you in uni holidays is an option.

Do your boys have summer jobs? I would encourage them to save some money so they can buy stuff for uni.

Yes, child maintenance and child benefit end 1st September.

My net wage is £2200, this is most of it mortgage is £1050, water £100, insurances £120, gas and electric £200, council tax £140, car £150 loan, Petrol £80, food £450 (def need to look at this!) child maintenance coming in is £300.
i have Netflix and Spotify for the boys, I shop at Aldi, I don’t go to a gym.

I don’t drink coffee, alcohol or smoke, I have the odd lunch with friends but that’s it.

Most of my mortgage is paid off in 3 years (for 13 years not really had a holiday -just got by for the boys camping trip each year) so I prioritized paying the mortgage/keeping the house. I know I could downsize it’s something I have thought about and will consider next year.

Have paid £20 per month into trust funds for them since birth, so they each have those to help with uni costs. They both have numerous festivals booked (paid for with their own birthday/Christmas money) from now till sept and doing some volunteering work on a number of weekends so them getting summer jobs would be tricky to fit in.

I'm reading this thread with interest as I'm also a single parent and DD goes off to uni next year.

I get quite despondent at times not knowing how I will manage into the future but forgot that certain outgoings will reduce...etc. when they leave (others not!)

Martin the Moneysaver has a very good tool on his site about parental contributions for Uni. If you are bringing in less than 25 K they will get maximum loan and maintenance grant. Further details on the site.

This will be measured at the point at which they apply to student finance england so it is worth bearing that in mind.

Part time job in theory a good idea but for intensive courses not always doable as it affects their study time.

I understand op. I earn a similar amount and have two (younger) boys. I keep thinking ‘this is a decent salary. Why am I struggling so much?’

I’m watching for good tips…

I really feel for others earning less 😢