What to do can't work or claim benefits

[Marianne22]

I've been on medication for depression and anxiety for 8 years.

I have dyslexia and an autism diagnosis.

I'm currently on a waiting list to be assessed for dyspraxia and something to do with cognitive ???

I know people CAN work with the above but I cannot.

I've tried. Day to day life is hard.

I had a PIP assessment in August and got awarded 2 points. I'm now waiting to hear back re a tribunal meeting.

There are lots of contradictions and false information in the DWP report.

I'm stuck. Husband works but it barely covers the bills.

Any advice please x

Are you getting child benefit. Have you had a benefit check to check for Universal credit entitlement? If you are unfit to work then you would need to go through a work capability assessment for UC but would have an extra element added if deemed not to be fit for any kind of work.

Thing is, OP, the eligibility for PIP is based on your personal daily living/mobility needs, not specifically whether or not you can work.

Obviously, many people who qualify for PIP will also be unable to work, but being unable to work doesn't in itself fulfil the criteria for PIP. As PPs have said, ESA or universal credit would usually cover that element.

Have you run the numbers through a universal credit calculator (Turn2Us or similar), taking into account your DC and your disability?

And are you claiming child benefit?

If you've checked all of that out and DH's salary is so high that you definitely don't qualify for any means-tested help, is there an issue with your being able to access DH's salary?

There was a similar post recently in which the OP wanted to know how to get PIP when they didn’t seem to meet (m)any of the criteria. Be warned: if you make it up you will be caught out. If you state you can’t look after yourself at all then be prepared for a life where you will have to live that disability every day.

Fwiw I cannot work. We cut our coat according to our cloth.

have you tried volunteering as a way of exploring what you can do and build up some confidence? It may help you identify some skills you could sue either working from home or in paid work locally. Your post is all about what you struggle with rather than , presumably, managing some home tasks and your dc. Who does school runs, teacher appointments , activities etc.

If your dh income is higher than the threshold to claim benefits maybe there is an issue with the outgoings and lifestyle. Is he extravagant while working away or saving money himself while you scrimp to get by on a limited amount or rely on dm?

Curious about your outgoings. What you're essentially saying is 'We have enough money, but we spend it. What can I do?' So, without more details, it's difficult to suggest anything.

PIP applications are often successful at the point of MR, but make sure they have the right info, because it doesn't sound like they do. Also, make sure you include the information about how you feel on your 'bad' days. Lots of people fill in benefit forms with info about what they can just about manage to do if they try their hardest, but can't sustain on a day to day basis. Don't be a martyr - tell them how bad it really is.

Have you had therapy OP?

Anxiety and depression are things you can recover from, to a large extent. I had 5 years of therapy and am a different person now.

With the right medication and with therapy it might be possible for you to get back to work.

I had panic attack disorder and agoraphobia through my 20s, I'm now mid 30s and as close to normal as I'm going to get, I now work full time. It's possible!

Maybe call the national autistic society help line?

Yes, the National Autistic Society have a guidance note on PIP on their website, although it sounds like the issues you're finding it hard to evidence are the MH ones, so might not be as relevant.

I'm not making anything up. Why would I?

We don't have spare money. I live off the child benefit. I can cook and wash I didn't raise I said I couldn't.

This thread has made me realise no one will believe me.

Can you research and see if there is something you can do from home? I used to do peoples ironing on top of working shifts and also child minded. Or possibly dog walking?

But what you're saying doesn't add up, even with the DC you didn't mention at the beginning.

You say you can't manage on your DHs 'good wage' despite presumably no childcare costs as you don't work. You also don't mention having high housing costs. People can't help you if what you're saying doesn't make sense.

Either your DH doesn't have 'a good wage' or there is a money management issue going on. Does working away cost your DH money? If he is employed, his employer should fully expense this (accomodation, food, travel) which can be quite cost effective as you're obviously not paying for his food most of the time.

Do you have access to money for clothes, food and other costs for the DC? CB on it's own obviously isn't enough, so your DH wage should be available to pay all household and child related costs and hopefully some personal spending money left over for each of you - is this happening, or does he keep you short of money? Do you have debts?

If you call Tesco and explain you're disabled you will qualify for priority slots, hope that helps with the shopping.

Before you go to your tribunal Have a look on the CAB website. It tells you exactly how to answer each question as it’s not what you say it’s how you say it. For example, meal preparation. You may be able to make breakfast but if something was missing or the spoons were missing what would you do and how would you manage. Also, after making one meal, could you make lunch or would you be too tired after the stress of making breakfast? Do you need to be encouraged to eat if you’re very down. This could go right back to your DH/DP having to remind you to get out of bed. Have you lost weight due to not eating? You can take notes and don’t be rushed. If you realise you’ve forgotten anything at the end then ask to go back as they can’t score you on something you haven’t said

I don't understand why it's an issue now!! If this has been ongoing enough for you to be on medication for the last 8years! Surely it was an issue 8 years too!! And yes OP I'm not saying that you are making it up however understand how hard it is to have a dh that works away and two dc to look after by yourself...it's not easy but no one said it would be or should be. How long is your dh away for at a time?? And at age 8 and 10 your dc should be more manageable, who looked after them as babies and toddlers??

Have you asked your mum to look at your husband's wages, plus any benefits like child benefit. This is your income

Then all your bills, which is your expenses

Perhaps you can move some bills to a cheaper provider

What does your husband say ?

This thread has made me realise no one will believe me

No-one on the internet knows you, OP - they have no knowledge on which to judge you and they're not making your PIP decision, so it doesn't matter what they think.

The PIP rejection always sounds like they're calling you a liar when they say 'you can do x', when you know you can't - it's awful. But while its poorly-worded and insensitive, all they mean is that they haven't received sufficient evidence. So again, don't read too much into it.

This stuff happens all the time, especially when people are looking at eligibility for funding/services, etc.

Sorry to be harsh, OP, but what matters to the people holding the purse strings is solid evidence of eligibility. Your feelings don't come into it, and it would be foolish to assume they'll read between the lines and twig that your disabilities might actually be what's impairing your ability to advocate for yourself or organise appropriate evidence. You might be able to make that point at the hearing, but again, you'll need solid evidence.

Can your mum help to pull all this together and get your evidence a bit more focussed?

Forgive me if I’m mistaken, but this is very similar to a poster who was enquiring about PIP for dyslexia.

I know that having a raft of ailments and having life-buggering issues is hard, but as others have said you need to consider first of all your household finances, rather than thinking about how many boxes need to be ticked to access disability payments.

@BishopBrennansArse

If you call Tesco and explain you're disabled you will qualify for priority slots, hope that helps with the shopping.

She isn’t though. And that’s not fair on people who genuinely can’t get out. If this situation was this bad then she would have a career and why have two children? Why is her husband working away and leaving her if she is so incapable.

If the only outgoing me is travel fair that’s eating up their money then he clearly needs to work closer to home.

If your earning enough money to not qualify you for benefits then they have to have an honest look at their outgoings. Money is going somewhere.

@Marianne22

I'm not making anything up. Why would I?

We don't have spare money. I live off the child benefit. I can cook and wash I didn't raise I said I couldn't.

This thread has made me realise no one will believe me.

If your living of child benefit where is your husbands wages? Do you have access to it?

Apply for esa, some people who are not eligible for pip do qualify for esa.

(Sorry, haven’t RTFT. My socially distanced plumber just arrived.)

1. Self employment is probably your best way forward of you feel that strongly about working for an employer.

2. PIP/DLA tribunals are very fair to claimants. Get some help if you can, otherwise just present your case clearly and logically with reference to the points system.

You might be eligible for ESA (employment support allowance ) contact jobcentre plus it is separate to PIP. Btw it is fine to mention your children and the support you get from your mum

you need to consider first of all your household finances, rather than thinking about how many boxes need to be ticked to access disability payments.

I agree OP needs to get to the bottom of what's going wrong with her finances as it all sounds a bit odd, but in terms of PIP, it's for the DWP to decide whether she's eligible and OP is perfectly entitled to go through the process of applying and appealing.

There's no way my disabled adult DC would have been able to apply for PIP independently, so getting help to gather appropriate evidence is essential for many applicants, otherwise they will fail precisely because their disability has impaired their independence.

Take a representative with you when you eventually go to tribunal

You have to be very sick to claim pip, and you will more often than not be rejected the first time and have to send it back for an appeal, my epileptic partner went through a year of nonstop migraines with a huge increase to his seizures, we tried to claim pip to help us get through it as he earns 3/4 of the household money which suddenly whittled down to half of what I earn as sick pay, he was denied, he couldn't even get out of bed some days as his state was so bad but the assessment said he was fine he was seizing in his arms and legs in front of her, he'd fallen down the stairs recently before due to a seizure in his thighs and luckily hadn't hurt himself but non of that mattered to them. They only have so much money to work with so I can understand why, only the worst of the worse seem to be able to claim and even then its a fight to get it.

My only advice is when filling out the application forms fill in it as if it's your worst day, don't average it out and say you're fine to do stuff if you know some days you arnt. Also send in as much proof as you can get, push for official diagnosis and keep letters even if they're letters of appointments, any kind of proof that you can show them.

I'm sorry you're struggling, I wish you all the luck in the world to get some help and be able to breathe a little eaiser.