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What should i do

102 replies

littlebunty2 · 07/01/2020 16:53

Thirty years ago my parents signed their house into my name, my sister was married to a professional gambler who made them bankrupt I think they were worried that the debt collectors would come after their house. My parents died Mum first then Dad. Me and wife spent a bit on the house over the years keeping it in good condition. My dad said that on his death when I sold the house to give my sister a share he wrote her a letter stating this which the solicitor held and I have a copy. Of course after his death when she found this out was angry because she thought she should get half. I didn't know what to do with the house so rented it for a few years then sold it last year. Now she has suddenly contacted me to say she knows I have sold the house and wants some. My solicitor told her she has no legal rights as its in my name I don't know what to do now, I had earmarked the money for certain things, I haven't seen her in seven years and she has no legal entitlement to any of the proceeds of the sale She is divorced from the gambler

OP posts:
PityParty4one · 09/01/2020 19:17

You dont actually care that its morally wrong.
Your father stated clearly "share" he probably didn't think he needed to stipulate half as he trusted you. Your sister has done nothing wrong apart from marry the wrong man which it seems you have been punishing her for over 20 years.

Put yourself I her shoes. How would you HONESTLY feel if she had all of the financial control?

Ginger1982 · 09/01/2020 19:17

Was there no other estate at all? Did your dad leave nothing else?

LittleLongDog · 09/01/2020 19:24

The solicitor has said the letter is not legally binding anyway.
But it was your father’s wishes.

What were you planning to give her? A percentage (what percentage?) but not half?

Lippy1234 · 09/01/2020 19:27

Littlecunty2 this has got to be a wind up.

TARSCOUT · 09/01/2020 19:32

Haven't read TFT if your DF wanted to leave half to DD he would have been advised to put it in trust. I think you should do what you think is best. In Scotland we have right of succession where she could have contested for 50% and I don't agree with this, a.person has no entitlement to inheritance.

littlebunty2 · 09/01/2020 19:33

The letter states an amount that is a quarter of the value to what I sold it for. When the letter was written the house wasn't worth as much anyway so the amount was less then half then. I have done work on the house, I rented it out. I hadn't planned on anything after not seeing her for seven years. My father also said he should have left it to my children

OP posts:
cptartapp · 09/01/2020 19:34

It doesn't matter if you were their 24/7 careers for ten years and she did nothing. That was your choice. What happened to their personal possessions and money? Did you get all that too?
You allude to what's fair when it's in your favour but are being anything but. She should get half.

littlebunty2 · 09/01/2020 19:39

She didn't want anything out of the house and there was little money in the will.

OP posts:
Lougle · 09/01/2020 19:47

I see my parents every day and help them with all of their financial issues, health issues, emotional support and practical support. My siblings see them once in a blue moon. We all live locally. If they were to die and there was any money, it would be split 3 ways. In fact, I don't care about the money. I'd rather have none than argue about it.

Your Dad trusted you. More fool him.

Scrumptiousbears · 09/01/2020 19:51

So how much is the value your dad asked you to give her?

Ginger1982 · 09/01/2020 20:36

So did you take all the money from the will too?

lucie8881 · 09/01/2020 21:02

This makes unpleasant reading.

You speak of the house as if you've acquired it through hard work and effort on your part. It was gifted to you by your parents, after their deaths you chose to keep it on and invest in it further. Not forgetting that over the years you have received rental income off the property, whether this broke even with your investment into the property, resulted in profit or indeed still left you in deficit isn't clear from OP. But regardless of that it was your choice to hold on to the property.

Regardless of the amount of money being discussed, it's only morally right that you do share with your sister, it was your fathers wish that you do so. You say that he verbally expressed a wish to divide the house profit between your children, but that really does come across as you attempting to justify cutting your sister out.

avocadont · 09/01/2020 21:12

At the very, very least you need to follow your fathers wishes. Who cares how long the house was in your name? It was his and your mother's home and if he wants a portion of what you made from selling the house to go to his child then who are you to ignore that?

Put yourself in your fathers shoes, would you trust one of your children to do right by you? How would you feel if they didn't?

cptartapp · 09/01/2020 21:27

How much money in the will? She should have got half of whatever.

sst1234 · 09/01/2020 21:57

OP is a troll, ignore.

DianaT1969 · 09/01/2020 22:33

Ah, I was hoping this wasn't true. I didn't want to think there was a brother like this in the world.

littlebunty2 · 09/01/2020 23:04

The amount is 40k its a lot of money. The amount left in the accounts was under 3k she had that this at the time. Thanks all for the input as I have said I haven't decided yet I will come back and update. Its not as cut and dry as some people think it never is it. Its been a few weeks since she contacted and I thought I would see what people thought. She lives away so I don't see her the thing that grates me if she gets the money I wont see her anyway

OP posts:
cptartapp · 10/01/2020 06:46

That's completely irrelevant. Inheritance isn't earnt.
But good luck.

BlouseAndSkirt · 10/01/2020 07:50

Deduct the amount you spent on the house and then give her half of the rest.

stevenage42 · 10/01/2020 08:04

Op maybe it is time to see your sister?

PegasusReturns · 10/01/2020 15:15

How much did the house sell for? I suspect a lot more than your dad anticipated when he said that he wanted you to give her £40k.

Can you really not see how badly you’re behaving here?!

Techway · 10/01/2020 16:17

OP, your dad only gave you the house to avoid a gambler, it wasn't yours, although legally it was.

You know what your Dad's intention was.If you do this then you will always have it on your conscious, you will morally be a thief and your sister will have a legitimate grudge against you.

Do the right thing.

MrMeSeeks · 10/01/2020 18:02

Why would she want to see you when you pull this? Some brother Hmm
Its a shame that your father didn’t put it in the will because he trusted you to do the right thing. Clearly a mistake.
It is cut and dry.

Looobyloo · 10/01/2020 18:22

Gosh this makes horrible reading. So your children deserve the money more than your sister to help them get on the property ladder?
You my dear are an absolute scumbag if you don't give her anything. Its not as if you worked your arse off to pay for your parents house, they gave it to you and irrelevant of how much you've spent on it your sister still deserves a share.

Why should you and your children gain from your parents hard work and not your sister?

I'm bloody glad you're not my brother!

OneKeyAtATime · 12/01/2020 07:58

Perhaps you are right legally speaking but this is not what your dad wanted. He made a mistake in how he passed on his house but you shouldn't use that as an excuse. You have to honour his wishes.
Perhaps it s 'a lot of money ' but it was his and you need to respect that.
Having witnessed a situation where one sibling does everything and the other is useless I however understand your frustration...